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Tag: Dale Moss

Bachelorette No. 1 gets her man. No. 2? To be continued

November 6, 2020 /
Clare Crawley and Dale Moss had their first one-on-one and their fantasy suite date
all in one on “The Bachelorette.” PHOTO CREDIT: Craig Sjodin/ABC

I can’t be mad at Clare Crawley for blowing up “The Bachelorette.”

Let’s be honest, how many more dates between her and men not named Dale did you really want to sit through, especially with everybody stuck in the bubble at La Quinta Resort? I hate to say it, but I miss helicopters and hot tubs in the middle of nowhere.

And yes, I know that new Bachelorette Tayshia Adams still has her own “journey” to go through, but at least she’s starting with 16 men, not 30 or more. She’ll have them whittled down in no time . . . er, well, she won’t be as quick as Clare.

Yes, Clare, the oldest Bachelorette in franchise history, turned out to be the speediest too. In just four episodes she went from Night 1 “I think my husband’s in this room” boilerplate to a proposal from the man of her dreams. Dale Moss, the former pro football player who had her in a tizzy straight out of the limo, put a ring on it in Thursday’s episode and, as far as I know right now, they’re still engaged.

When we all congratulated ABC on installing a more mature woman as the star of the franchise, obviously none of us expected this outcome, but Clare’s maturity had a lot to do with it (and to be clear, I’m not saying that 39 is old). When you get to a certain age, when you’ve had enough crappy experiences in your love life and you meet someone who ticks all the boxes, you’re not playing; you want to get on with it.

So Clare got on with it.

After last week‘s group date in which Clare declined to give anyone a rose, host Chris Harrison showed up at her door for a “we need to talk” chat. “The path we’re on right now, we can’t continue,” he said.

Clare admitted she’d been creeping Dale’s social media after filming first shut down due to COVID-19, although she swore on her father’s grave there had been no contact. But she learned that she and Dale had things in common: the loss of a beloved parent (her dad, his mom), a family member in a care facility (his sister, her mother). “I feel like Dale is my match,” Clare told Harrison.

“You spent your whole life looking for someone that’ll remind you of your dad. Is Dale that man?” Harrison asked.

“I think he is,” Clare said, tearing up. Even Harrison had to wipe his eyes.

“Congratulations, you’ve just blown up ‘The Bachelorette,'” he said.

It was a little more complicated than that, of course. First Clare had to find out whether Dale felt the same way she did. That night, in place of the cocktail party and rose ceremony the other men had been expecting, Dale and Clare had their first one-on-one date.

I won’t repeat the whole conversation — although I thought it was kind of cool that they both shared stories about their fathers having to hitchhike to go see their mothers when they met them — the bottom line was that they admitted to falling in love with each other.

Bri Stauss and Chris Watson from “The Bachelor Presents: Listen to Your Heart”
serenade Clare and Dale on “The Bachelorette.” PHOTO CREDIT: Craig Sjodin/ABC

There was much smooching, some slow dancing to live music (Chris and Bri from “Listen to Your Heart,” yay!) and then they retired to Clare’s suite, a.k.a. the fastest fantasy suite in the history of the franchise.

Chris Harrison wasn’t playing either. Once he had confirmed that all was well in Clare and Dale land, Harrison was resolute: there was going to be a proposal and it was going to be that night.

Skeptical? Hell yeah. I think we all felt how Neil Lane’s face looked when Harrison FaceTimed him and said, “I need to get the ring today.”

The other guys weren’t buying it either when Clare fessed up that she had found the love of her life in Dale. “I’m really nervous for her, I think she’ll get hurt in the end,” said Hamilton, Ontario wildlife manager Blake Moynes — who was also annoyed that he bought a book on dementia and Alzheimer’s so he could talk to Clare about her mom and it was all for naught.

But seriously, it did seem crazy to think that Dale was really going to propose. Even Clare seemed doubtful. And as she stood on a terrace in a long white dress waiting for Dale to arrive, Harrison walked over with a concerned look on his face and said, “There’s something I need to tell you.” Oh no.

Cut to Blake and Kenny hanging by the pool, speculating that Dale wasn’t ready to get engaged. Then back to Harrison: “I just want to say, we are so proud of you.”

Meanest fakeout or what?

I’m sure Clare forgave him, because Dale did it: he got down on one knee, he asked Clare to marry him, he put the ring on her finger. I don’t know if it will last, but it’s been a crap year and a particularly shitty week, so hell yeah, I’ll take a happy ending.

“I’ve waited a lot of years for this,” she said — which if you’ll permit me one quibble, makes me wonder what we watched when Quebec’s Benoit Beausejour-Savard get down on one knee during a “Bachelor Winter Games” tell-all special, but never mind. Clare and Dale were happy; the other 16 guys not so happy, particularly after Harrison came to tell them that Clare and Dale had left the resort as an engaged couple.

But wait, there’s more: they could go home and lick their wounds (although with the possible exception of Jason, who really seemed to bond with Clare on their one-on-one, how invested could these guys have been after just a couple of weeks?) or they could put on their suits and prepare to continue their “journey.” And they had just hours to make up their minds.

Despite the grumbling from fellows like Blake and Riley about how into Clare they had been, all 16 guys made their way to the party room, even Jason, to meet “your new Bachelorette.”

Ta da, it’s finally been confirmed: Tayshia Adams is the replacement Bachelorette.
PHOTO CREDIT: Kwaku Alston/ABC

And yes, the franchise’s worst kept non-secret was finally confirmed when Tayshia Adams stepped out of a limo, looking absolutely gorgeous. After Harrison assured her she wasn’t being punked we saw her head toward the men . . . “to be continued.”

So yep, we’ll have to wait till next week to see who Tayshia sparks with and what the hell Harrison means when he says “Everything is about to change.” And oh yeah, Clare and Dale will be back to “tell all.”

“The Bachelorette” airs Tuesdays at 8 p.m. on Citytv. Feel like chatting about “Bachelorette”? Come visit my Facebook page. You can also follow me on Twitter @realityeo

On The Bachelorette, Clare only has eyes — and lips — for Dale

October 28, 2020 /
Yosef Aborady with Clare Crawley on Night 1 of “The Bachelorette.” PHOTO CREDIT: Craig Sjodin/ABC

I guess in hindsight we should thank Yosef Aborady for being such a jerk. His tirade against Clare Crawley on “The Bachelorette” was about the only part of the episode that wasn’t about Clare’s obssession with Dale Moss.

Look, I hope Clare and Dale live happily ever after, I really do (and if you’ve been reading my recaps for a while, you know I avoid spoilers on purpose, so I have no idea if they’re still together or not), but I get why the guys not named Dale were so annoyed on Tuesday: we surpassed peak Dale and ran head on into Dale fatigue.

In weeks 1 and 2, Clare at least pretended to be interested in the other men; this week not so much.

She basically scuttled the first group date so she could gab to her friend, former Bachelorette DeAnna Pappas, about Dale. Then, the extended cocktail party she promised the disappointed men turned into an extended makeout session with Dale in Clare’s suite. On the one-on-one date, Clare was so disinterested she couldn’t be bothered to show up for dinner and got host Chris Harrison to send the guy home. And on the second group date, she grilled the men about their resentment of Dale then declined to give anyone a rose.

It looks like next week’s episode, airing Thursday instead of Tuesday because of the U.S. election, is when Clare will blow up “The Bachelorette” and that’s a good thing. Dale seems like a decent fellow (although I’m not convinced he’s as into Clare as she is him), but it’s time to change the channel to something besides “The Dale and Clare Show.”

Which reminds me, Yosef: the single dad decided to give Clare a piece of his mind over last week‘s strip dodgeball date. Not only was it “classless” and “distasteful,” it was an “atrocity,” he declared, which seems like a strong word for a bunch of guys showing their “man goodies,” but OK.

“I expected a lot more from the oldest Bachelorette that’s ever been. I can’t believe that occurred,” scolded Yosef. “You’re not setting the right example for my daughter. ” (Huh? You’re gonna let your 4-year-old daughter watch “The Bachelorette”?)

“I’m ashamed to be associated with you. I can’t believe I sacrificed so much to be here just to watch this distasteful and classless display,” blah, blah, blah.

And then Yosef, who should perhaps reflect on the definition of the word “classless,” told Clare she “sounded a little crazy” on the first group date when she chided the men for seeming more interested in hanging out with each other than with her. Oh boy.

Clare tried to interject and Yosef tried to talk over her: “Do not interrupt me … I’m not done yet.”

Oh, but he was.

“Do not ever talk to me like that,” said a furious Clare. “I never thought I would have to tell any man (other than Juan Pablo Galavis) I would never want them being the father of my child and I stand by that. I would never want my children having a father like you. Get out of here.”

Yosef went but not quietly. “I expected more from the oldest Bachelorette in history. Remember you’re almost 40,” he sniped as he walked away.

Perhaps Yosef should remember that he’s the father of a little girl and he just set the example of being completely disrespectful to a woman. I get it, the strip dodgeball was kind of skeevy, but the way he expressed his opinion about it was condescending and misogynistic, so good riddance to Yosef.

The encounter left Clare in tears and it was Dale to the rescue. He hugged and comforted her, told her he was sorry, that she didn’t deserve Yosef’s abuse, that Yosef was lying when he said the other men were trying to appease her. “I’m here to please you, how about that?”

Mission accomplished. “It’s not even the second rose ceremony yet and I’m so falling in love with Dale,” Clare said.

Anyway, Clare told Harrison she was too rattled to salvage the rest of the cocktail party and went straight to the rose ceremony, handing out another 14 (on top of the four we saw her give out last week).

For the remaining men, the botched evening was a sign of things to come.

I have no idea why DeAnna Pappas showed up in Clare’s suite the next day. Weren’t they all in a bubble? Did DeAnna really get multiple COVID-19 tests and quarantine for days just so she could listen to Clare gush about Dale and smell a pair of Dale’s pants? Yes, seriously, Clare and DeAnna both smelled a pair of Dale’s trousers that Clare kept after he ripped them on a group date.

The upshot was that Dale, Chasen, Jason, Jay, Eazy, Ed, Blake and Riley were kept waiting for hours for their date to begin, then Clare breezed in and told them they’d have a “really long cocktail party” that night instead. They didn’t realize the “really long” part referred to the time that Clare and Dale spent making out on her bed after he told the other men he wanted just five minutes with her. Who knows how long they would have stayed in there and what they would have got up to if Eazy hadn’t knocked on Clare’s door.

And then, with Clare being told by the producers she had to hurry her time with the rest of the men, Dale went back for seconds, interrupting Jay. Dale and Clare were up against a wall smooching and getting a little handsy when Chasen walked in.

The other guys were understandably pissed, especially after Dale got the date rose and tried to justify it by saying he was the “best man suited,” whatever that means.

Clare, admitting in her confessional she’d had to restrain herself from having sex with Dale the night before, went off for a one-on-one with Zach J. and, man, was it awkward. The couples pedicure was a bust and it was all downhill from there. After a swim, Clare leaned in for a kiss, but Zach didn’t meet her halfway, so Clare pulled back and then Zach made everything worse by grabbing Clare by the neck, twice, and trying to force a kiss on her. Clare said that made her feel “extremely uncomfortable” — gee, I can’t imagine why — so uncomfortable that she didn’t show up for dinner and it was up to Harrison to tell Zach he was going home.

Clare gets her turn at the Bachelorette Roast alongside Brendan, Joe, Bennett, Zac C, Demar, Ivan, Kenny, Jordan C and Ben. PHOTO CREDIT: Craig Sjodin/ABC

And then came the second group date, a roast presided over by comedian Margaret Cho. The guys all claimed to be sick of Dale, who was in the audience, but they made him the main target of their jokes. Did they really think that ridiculing him would change Clare’s mind? If so, I’ll just echo what Clare said: “Are you new here?”

Instead, the roast made Clare feel defensive about Dale and so later, as she chatted with Bennett and Brendan and Ben and Demar and Jordan and Joe and Ivan and Zac and Kenny, she asked each of them to explain why they made fun of Dale. She declined to give any of them a rose, declaring, “I did not get what I needed with you guys.”

That set the stage for next week’s big bang and for Tayshia Adams to take Clare’s spot as Bachelorette. There will be anger, there will be tears, there will be drama with a capital D.

I’m not certain if Citytv is airing it Nov. 5 or not, but it will definitely be on ABC at 8 p.m.

Feel like chatting about “Bachelorette”? Come visit my Facebook page. You can also follow me on Twitter @realityeo

On ‘The Bachelorette,’ all is bare in love and dodgeball

October 21, 2020 /
Clare and the “red team” after a game of strip dodgeball on Tuesday’s “The Bachelorette.”
You should see what the losers were wearing. PHOTO CREDIT: Craig Sjodin/ABC

Welcome to “The Bachelorette,” the “naked edition.” If you want to be with Clare prepare to get bare: either your feelings or, in the immortal words of Demar, your “man goodies.”

Yep, it was that kind of night.

We started with Clare getting touchy feely with the fellows on a group date, segued to a one-on-one that was more of a therapy session and ended with another group date that must have used up a full season’s supply of ass-covering black bars.

Regardless of what happens with Dale Moss — don’t worry, I haven’t forgotten about him — Clare Crawley is definitely blazing her own trail through her “Bachelorette” journey. I’m not sure we’ve seen a Bachelorette who cuts to the chase as quickly as she does.

When self-described “Italian stallion” Brandon couldn’t give Clare a reason for wanting to be with her other than “You’re so beautiful” Clare speedily gave him the boot. When she had to coax the guys on the first group date into asking for one-on-one time, she told them straight up, “You guys all want to hang out with each other you can do that and I can go home and go to bed.”

When Canadian dude Blake Moynes broke the rules (again!) by stealing alone time he wasn’t entitled to, Clare rewarded him with an early rose.

No doubt, we’ll soon see Blake disappointed along with everybody else as Clare and Dale get closer, but she at least made an effort with some of the other men, judging by this episode.

Things kicked off with a kind of cheesy group date about “love language.” Clearly, with everybody in quarantine at La Quinta Resort, we’re not going to see the wide-ranging and varied dates of the BP (before pandemic) era. So we had Riley, Jordan, Yosef, Ivan, Ben, Bennett, the two Zachs and Dale having to make lovey-dovey speeches to Clare, “Romeo and Juliet”-style, as she looked out a fake window.

Dale’s was the longest. To sum up, he told Clare he was committed to giving her everything he had, physically and emotionally. He started to make good on the physical part in an exercise in which Clare was blindfolded and each of the men, also blindfolded, had to touch her while the other dudes watched.

In theory, this was about regaining the touch that everyone had been deprived of in the COVID-19 pandemic; in reality, it was about stirring up jealousy as the men watched other guys getting handsy with Clare, none more so than Dale.

Clare and Dale get touchy-feely during the first group date. PHOTO CREDIT: Craig Sjodin/ABC

Dale got to do a little more touching, and kissing, at the date cocktail party during which Clare confessed to Dale that her feelings for him scared her. But he didn’t get the date rose. It went to New York lawyer Riley, who also shared smooches with Clare and a “prom” slow dance (did somebody on production tip him off that Clare never went to her high school prom or what?).

The date also exposed a condescending attitude on Yosef’s part toward Clare. When Clare told the men they had hurt her feelings by not stepping up for alone time, Yosef — claiming to speak for all of them, which pissed Riley off — told her, “You’re crazy to think that we didn’t all come here for you.”

That doesn’t sound like love language to me.

On the one-on-one date, meanwhile, the language sounded more like therapy than love speak.

Clare warned former pro footballer Jason they would be sharing deep parts of themselves, which had Jason terrified. Clare, or more likely somebody on the production team, had discerned that Jason was using his sense of humour to compensate for a dark past, so during their evening together Clare and Jason did a little primal scream therapy, read inspirational letters to their younger selves, and busted slates covered in negative words that other people had used to describe them.

Clare, doing her best imitation of a therapist, got Jason to admit to witnessing unspecified painful things in his childhood, which he had kept hidden by pushing other people away and hooking up with multiple women — all of which Clare insisted didn’t scare her.

In one final bit of exorcism, Clare burned the dress she wore during the “Bachelor” finale in which she told Juan Pablo Galavis to get stuffed. It remains to be seen whether other garments will follow on other therapy dates, perhaps a “Bachelor in Paradise” bikini or a “Bachelor Winter Games” parka.

And then came the final group date, a.k.a. “Clare’s Extreme Dodgeball Bash,” a.k.a. “strip dodgeball.”

Because it wasn’t humiliating enough for the “blue team” of Blake, Kenny, Brendan, Garin and Demar to lose every game of dodgeball to the “red team” (Eazy, Brandon, Joe, Jay and Chasen) — thus forfeiting extra time with Clare — they had to walk back to their suite starkers or very nearly so. A couple of the guys kept their jock straps on; the rest just covered their bits with their hands.

“She might see my man goodies tonight,” Demar said prophetically before the game started. That she did and a few others besides. The date card said she wanted a man with some balls: I guess she wanted proof.

Blake Moynes during the dodgeball game, before he lost all his kit. PHOTO CREDIT: Craig Sjodin/ABC

Anyway, Blake — belying the myth of the polite Canadian — got dressed, combed his beard and wandered over to where Clare was partying with the winners, interrupting Jay right in the middle of a scintillating story about wanting to open his own gym.

Clare let him hang out for a few minutes — despite Jay and the rest of the red team returning to stare him down — and told him she appreciated him coming but did some dodging of her own when Blake tried to kiss her.

The date rose went to Chasen, with whom Clare bonded over the fact they were both considered losers in high school.

We never got through the rose ceremony, probably because the inevitable blow-up with Yosef is being saved for next week. Yosef told the other men the strip dodgeball game was “classless” and that he was going to let Clare know his thoughts — because no doubt she’s just dying to hear them, as are we all.

We saw Blake get his rose and the kiss he’d been denied the night before, and then Clare pulled Dale away so they could talk and do some hot and heavy smooching; like, seriously, she looked like she wanted to devour him.

Next week, Yosef tells Clare he’s “ashamed to be associated” with her and it looks like resentment over Clare’s relationship with Dale will start to build.

“The Bachelorette” airs Tuesdays at 8 p.m. on Citytv. Feel like chatting about “Bachelorette”? Come visit my Facebook page. You can also follow me on Twitter @realityeo

On a quarantine ‘Bachelorette’ Clare Crawley’s already smitten

October 14, 2020 /
Clare Crawley waits to meet the men on Night 1 of “The Bachelorette.”
PHOTO CREDIT: Craig Sjodin/ABC

Welcome to the Bachelorette Bubble where you’ll get a swab up your nose and, if you’re lucky, a rose on your lapel.

Or is that unlucky — considering that any man not named Dale Moss appears to have zero chance with the oldest Bachelorette in franchise history (and yes, apparently we have to be reminded of that over and over and over again).

One thing that producers couldn’t keep quarantined at La Quinta Resort in California were all the stories about Clare Crawley walking out partway through the season to get with Dale, with “Bachelor” and “Bachelor in Paradise” fave Tayshia Adams replacing her as Bachelorette.

No, ABC hasn’t admitted that’s what’s going to happen — and if you thought they would on Night 1, what are you, new? — but it certainly was strongly hinted at in the promos.

And don’t forget Clare’s reaction after she first met Dale, a 31-year-old former pro football player. Seeming shaken, puffing out her breath after Dale left her to go inside, she said, “I definitely  feel like I just met my husband” — a pronouncement startling enough to bring host Chris Harrison over from wherever he hangs out as the limos empty of men to tell Clare that no one had ever said that at this stage before. But hey, here comes another limo, so snap out of it.

Clare Crawley with Dale Moss on Night 1 of “The Bachelorette,” the man she pegged
as her future husband. PHOTO CREDIT: Craig Sjodin/ABC

Clare did her duty, chatting with as many of the men as she could manage before handing out 23 roses.

An early theme of the proceedings seemed to be congratulating Clare for being 39 years old — gasp — and still trying to bag herself a man instead of, you know, admitting her old maidenhood and retreating to a solitary life with her two dogs.

In the video call in which Harrison told Clare she’d been chosen as the Bachelorette he said that since she hadn’t given up on herself, “we feel it would be appropriate if we didn’t give up on you.”

Um, you don’t say.

We were reminded of Clare’s Bachelor history, including being runner-up on Juan Pablo Galavis’ season (ick) and a couple of unsuccessful forays on “Bachelor in Paradise.” Curiously, “Bachelor Winter Games,” after which she actually ended up engaged, however briefly, to Canadian food dude Benoit Beausejour-Savard, got left out entirely. Is that because Clare doesn’t consider Benoit one of the “jerks” from her past?

In a conversation in which Harrison dutifully pushed Clare’s buttons, getting her teary-eyed talking about her late father, Clare declared, “I’m here and I haven’t given up on love and I never will. Just by showing up it shows I still want it and I still deserve it,” as if that was actually a question.

It was time to bring on the 31 men. Instead of the usual “getting to know you” packages filmed in some of the standouts’ hometowns, we got footage of them in quarantine at La Quinta, some of it self-taped. Think solo chess games, jumping on the bed, bubble baths and masks, both the coronavirus and cosmetic kind (well, OK, only one guy applied a cosmetic mask). And I don’t know about you, but seeing those big guys’ eyes water after their COVID-19 tests (they had to take more than one to be cleared to meet Clare) made me hope I never have to take one myself.

I won’t bore you with all the men’s names because, let’s be honest, you’ll have forgotten most of them by the time the season ends.

Besides Dale, one of the interesting ones was Blake Moynes, a 29-year-old wildlife manager from Hamilton, Ontario, Canada. He broke the show’s rules (which is funny because rules get broken all the time if it adds to the drama) by contacting Clare during the quarantine. “It meant everything to me,” said Clare, tearing up, adding that she was struggling because her mother, who’s in a care home with Alzheimer’s, had just fallen and broken her nose.

Clare with Canadian competitor Blake Moynes. PHOTO CREDIT: Craig Sjodin/ABC

Blake was rewarded with the first kiss (or at least, that’s how it was edited) but then watched in disappointment as Clare spirited away Dale to give him the first impression rose — and an even smoochier kiss.

Speaking of drama, West Virginia lawyer Tyler C. ratted out medical device salesman Yosef Aborady for allegedly creeping on some woman that Tyler knew on Instagram, but Clare believed Yosef when he said there was no substance to the accusation and sent Tyler home.

Clare mediates between Tyler C. and Yosef. PHOTO CREDIT: Craig Sjodin/ABC

Sounds like Clare might regret that since the word online is that Yosef said some nasty things to her that got him kicked out ahead of a future rose ceremony. We’ll see. To me, the single dad reeked of smarminess and cockiness, which you’d think somebody with all Clare’s experience would suss out right away.

Another potential villain was Bennett, who went to Harvard and said that when you tell people that, it’s described as dropping the “H-bomb.” No, really, he said that. He showed up to meet Clare in a Rolls-Royce and a tux with a white scarf draped around his neck.

Another guy wore a straitjacket, because he’d gone “a little crazy” waiting to meet Clare. There was a knight — in shining armour, get it? Someone wore a fake pregnancy belly in homage to Clare’s “Bachelor” entrance. Someone else wore a T-shirt with a photo of Clare’s dogs, which was good enough to earn a rose without any one-on-one time. There was a dude in a parachute because he’d “fallen” for her and another in a plastic bubble.

I’ll tell you what the men didn’t wear a lot of was ties and socks, lots of fellows baring their ankles. The best dressed had to be sports marketing agent Eazy in his salmon suit, although I couldn’t help but notice when he made his entrance by bursting through a poster that read “Your Future Husband” he seemed to smile at the camera before he smiled at Clare.

Anyway, hold those thoughts. It sounds like in just a few short weeks, the drama is going to be all about Clare blowing up “The Bachelorette,” as Harrison put it. Stay tuned.

“The Bachelorette” airs Tuesdays at 8 p.m. on Citytv. Feel like chatting about “Bachelorette”? Come visit my Facebook page. You can also follow me on Twitter @realityeo

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