of them was with Brendan Scanzano. PHOTO CREDIT: All photos courtesy of Citytv
Do you know what happens when a dog pees to mark its territory? Every other dog that walks by tries to pee on that exact spot.
So there’s a big flaw in Kamil Nicalek’s analogy suggesting he’s warning other men off his territory at Camp Paradise, i.e. Caitlin, the same way his dog does when he takes a leak. That’s not how it works, bro.
Take Brendan Scanzano, for instance. No one has marked his figurative territory better than him since “Bachelor in Paradise Canada” began, with him and Illeana virtually inseparable since Day 1.
But if you want to stick with the pee analogy, new arrival Adam Kunder unleashed a veritable fire hose on Brendan’s turf in Sunday’s episode when he took Illeana on not one but two dates.
How will this triangle work out? We’ll have to wait till next week to find out where Illeana bestows her rose.
But given that the strongest couple on the beach appears to be threatened, Lisa Mancini might have had the right idea when she joked on a previous episode about having a “Bachelor” show for friendships. Four weeks into “Paradise Canada,” the bromances and womances are looking more solid than any boy-girl pairing.
For instance, Kamil was boiling mad and ready to defend his best friend Brendan S, to the point that his aggressive attitude was freaking Caitlin out. (Although to be clear, the most he threatened to do was to flick Adam’s backwards baseball cap off his head.) I kind of get Kamil’s defensiveness. I don’t want to see Brendan get hurt either, although Caitlin also has a point: Illeana is a grown-ass woman and can make her own decisions.
Not everyone was pulling for Brendan S and Illeana. Joey expressed the opinion that Illeana was being “suffocated” by Brendan and told him to his face he was like “a lost little puppy” following Illeana home.
On a more thoughtful note, Joey also theorized that Brendan — who shared how much he longed for a regular family life since his parents had split up when he was 3 — was looking for a committed relationship to help him feel whole. So maybe we’ll just call him Dr. Joey from now on.
Brendan was already fretting about Illeana’s level of commitment the night before Adam arrived when she left him to chat first with Alex and then Jeremy. (And I have to come clean here. I said last week that the promo showed Alex kissing Illeana, but that was Kit he was smooching. Sorry, wrong blond.)
To put things in perspective, these folks had been hanging out for just seven days by the time Adam showed up. That’s more summer vacation romance than put a ring on it, although Brendan said he was ready to leave Paradise with Illeana.
On the other hand, Illeana did tell Brendan during a romantic hot tub encounter, “There’s really no way that someone could come in and take your place.”
So how did she go from that to telling besties Angela and Caitlin that she got “a lot deeper” with Windsor, Ontario firefighter Adam after just one date?
Well, kissing had something to do with it, lots and lots of kissing. Sure, Illeana might say it was the fact she and Adam both like to meditate and journal (although he calls his daily entry a “mission statement”), and that they had deep conversation (he told her he’d been engaged and had a friend die in a tragic accident), but Adam himself hit the nail on the head: “The sexual chemistry is out of control.”
Bartender Kevin Wendt, who has a front-row seat to all the action, told other cast members that “from minute 2 to hour 5, they were just making out,” “they” being Illeana and Adam.
It’s worth noting this isn’t the first time we’ve seen a “Bachelor” show makeout sesh in a bouncy castle — yes, I’m talking about Nick Viall and Corinne Olympios — although at least Illeana didn’t straddle Adam, not that we saw on camera anyway.
But let’s take a break from the Illeana, Adam and Brendan S show to talk about other folks.
The only person as disappointed as Brendan to see Adam arrive was Chris.
He put on his best man bun in anticipation of a new woman hitting the beach and possibly saving his ass from elimination, but nope, just another dude.
Oh well, there’s always a friendship rose from Lisa. Oops, wait, is that Lisa kissing Josh in a hot tub?
Yeah, the Josh and Angela flirtation from last episode lasted only as long as it took for Brendan Morgan to reclaim Angela after she got back from her date with Josh. She admitted to “a smooch” with Josh but melted when Brendan told her, “Honestly, today has kind of been an eye-opening day for me. It helped me realize how much I actually like you.”
So Josh rediscovered his admiration for Lisa being her quirky, cos-playing self. Lisa felt he was being genuine and not just rose-hunting, and I’d like to believe that too, because I want nothing but good things for Lisa. But if Josh truly is a “Bachelor Nation” fan, as the cast list claims, he probably knows how to play the game.
So who did Chris zero in on when Lisa’s rose seemed uncertain? Would you believe Vay?
Not only did he tell Vay he had more than a casual interest in her, he asked Joey, Vay’s Paradise flame, to consider sending her on a date with Chris. Like I’ve said before, the dude’s got some balls.
Joey, with an eye roll, described Chris’s manoeuvres as throwing a hook in the water but without any bait on the hook. He also speculated Chris would hit on the camera woman next.
You might be wondering why Chris would ask Joey to send him on a date. It’s because Joey was given a card that invested him with the power to send any two of his fellow campers on a rendezvous.
He flirted with the idea of sending Adam on another date, but with Caitlin this time, who was down with it. She was feeling underappreciated by Kamil, given how much attention he’d focused on supporting his buddy Brendan S, and also stressed since Brendan and Illeana were both friends.
But, in the end, Joey sent Adam and Illeana on yet another date.
Why? I suspect producer influence had more to do with it than Adam’s promise of Calgary Stampede tickets.
This time it was a hockey date, but the scoring appeared to be about tongues in mouths rather than pucks in nets.
Still, Illeana intimated that Adam wasn’t a shoo-in for her rose.
So next week we find out who she’s gonna pick. Meanwhile, Lisa stresses over who to give her rose to (given Chris’s entertainment value to the producers, my money would be on him). There’s also more tension between Kamil and Adam. And is there trouble ahead for Kamil and Caitlin, the other longest lasting couple in Paradise so far?
In the promo, we hear Mike Ogilvie saying that “Kamil is just on a downward spiral on his way out of Paradise” and “I’m Mack truck Mike and if you don’t move over I’m gonna run you off the road.” Is that Caitlin we see Mike asking out on a date? I don’t know for sure, but that’s definitely Stacy crying.
You can tune in next Sunday at 8 p.m. on Citytv. And don’t forget “Bachelor After Show: After Paradise” at 9:30 p.m. If you want to talk Paradise with me you can comment here, visit my Facebook page or follow me on Twitter @realityeo
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