SPOILER ALERT: DON’T READ THIS UNLESS YOU’RE COOL WITH LEARNING THE RESULTS OF EPISODE 5 OF “CANADA’S DRAG RACE.”
Can we talk?
Canada had its first ever “Snatch Game” on Thursday night and, thanks to Jimbo doing a hilarious Joan Rivers and a few other excellent impersonations, it was a hoot.
I mean, I had never seen JoJo Siwa before (sorry, I missed “Dance Moms”), but Lemon cracked me up as the over-enthusiastic teenager. Ditto with porn star Rebecca More — Ilona Verley earned some genuine laughs impersonating the bawdy Brit (Brooke Lynn Hytes: “Spell cock”; Ilona as Rebecca: “C-ock”). Rita Baga was fantastic as a cranky, sleepy version of French singer Edith Piaf and Scarlett BoBo did a decent Liza Minnelli.
(Don’t take my word for it. Check it out on Crave if you haven’t seen the episode yet.)
But what the hell happened to Priyanka? Even though I had never heard of psychic Miss Cleo I figured Priyanka was going to kill it given her triumphs in the ‘Her-itage Moments” and “Canada Gay-M” challenges. Instead she was like a deer in the headlights whenever Brooke Lynn came to her for answers.
Priyanka claimed she was good at improv as a former kids’ TV host. I guess children are way easier to please than a bunch of drag queens and a couple of gay designers (hello Colin and Justin).
What’s that Priyanka? The Toronto queens are “dropping like flies”? No shit. Priyanka ended up in the bottom two but survived the lip sync against Montreal’s Kiara.
I’ve had Priyanka figured for top three or four, at least. Maybe Miss Cleo would know . . . er, never mind.
Thursday solidified Victoria’s Jimbo and Montreal’s Rita Baga as the front-runners. They’re both smart, quick-witted and inventive on the runway.
Speaking of the runway — “Night of a Thousand Celines” as in Dion — Jimbo was a hit there too as she recreated Celine Dion’s 2019 Paris Fashion Week look. Together with her Snatch Game triumph, it won Jimbo the maxi-challenge.
Jimbo’s wasn’t my favourite look, however. That was Priyanka, who started out in a replica of Dion’s over-the-top 1994 wedding dress and fur cape then stripped off to reveal a copy of her gold gown from the 2016 Billboard Music Awards.
Rita Baga did a double look too — the white Eurovision coat dress from 1988 and a sparkly black mini dress from Dion’s tour that same year — but it wasn’t as impressive as Priyanka’s.
Given Priyanka’s runway excellence, I don’t get how she ended up in bottom two instead of BOA, who underwhelmed the judges with both her Snatch Game and her copy of Dion’s fringed Met Gala dress. Maybe it’s just me.
Kiara had a nice look — a sparkly, ruffly version of Dion’s little black 2019 album release dress — but her Snatch Game was just as bad as Priyanka’s. Let’s just say if you have a strong Quebecois accent, imitating a celeb who doesn’t sound French is not the best call. Kiara might have redeemed herself with a clever answer or two to Brooke’s questions, but she had nothin’.
However, she definitely left it all on the stage in an epic lip sync to Dion’s version of “I Drove All Night” — perhaps a little too much as there were moments she looked frantic. Priyanka struck a better balance between tricks and emoting for the win.
And can I pause here and say I loved comedian Mary Walsh as guest host? (Mary to Brooke: “Miss Brooke Lynn Hytes, have you ever tasted cod tongue?” Brooke: “I’m sorry, I don’t speak East Coast lesbian.”)
The episode marked another first for Canada’s drag queens: the first reading session. Lemon won that mini-challenge, but I would have given it to Rita Baga. After all, she had the audacity to read Brooke Lynn: “I’m very grateful that we have this opportunity to do ‘Drag Race’ so finally a Canadian can win ‘Drag Race.'” That’s gotta take balls, tucked or untucked.
Anyway, if you want to talk about being shady, next week the seven remaining queens have to tell the judges which of their fellow queens should go home and why. Until then . . .
Catch “Canada’s Drag Race” Thursdays at 9 p.m. on Crave.
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