Because I love television. How about you?

Month: February 2022

Watchable Feb. 28-March 6, 2022

SHOW OF THE WEEK: The Dropout (March 3, Disney Plus)

Amanda Seyfried as Elizabeth Holmes and Naveen Andrews as Sunny Balwani in “The Dropout.”
PHOTO CREDIT: Beth Dubber/Hulu

There has already been much information about Elizabeth Holmes and Theranos in the public eye — including newspaper and magazine articles, a book and a podcast — but there’s something about a well-done dramatization that can really bring a story to life.

“The Dropout” is a well-done dramatization.

Amanda Seyfried gives a can’t-take-your-eyes-off-her performance as Holmes, as we watch her transform from a misguided but seemingly well-meaning college dropout with a dream into a monster in a Steve Jobs turtleneck and too bright lipstick.

Monster might seem overly dramatic, but how else do you describe someone whose reaction on hearing that a Day 1 employee and supporter has committed suicide is joy that a lawsuit in which he can no longer testify against the company has been won?

Her chief enabler is Sunny Balwani (Naveen Andrews), her 19-years-older boyfriend and eventual COO of Theranos, portrayed as a bullying, fearsomely loyal protector of Holmes and her company.

“The Dropout” makes it easy to believe that Holmes had good intentions when she created Theranos — a startup that claimed to have invented a technology by which blood tests could be performed with just a single drop of blood — but by the time it all came crashing down the goal of helping people had been irretrievably subsumed by the singleminded imperative to succeed at any cost.

What is truly astonishing is how many high profile people allowed themselves to be bamboozled by Holmes despite the lack of evidence that the technology worked — spoiler alert: it didn’t.

In the series, this wilful blindness is best personified by two actors: Sam Waterston, who co-stars as George Shultz, a former U.S. Secretary of State who became a bullish member of Theranos’ board; and Alan Ruck (“Succession”) as Jay Rosan, the Walgreens VP so desperate to put Theranos’ machines in the drug chain’s stores and beat its rivals that Holmes’ refusal to demonstrate the tech was no deterrent.

Believing in fraudsters is not a uniquely American trait, of course, but one wonders how much the vaunted idea of the American dream played into the elevation of Holmes to celebrity billionaire status.

Seyfried, speaking to a Television Critics Association panel, said she believed Holmes “was incredible at creating the story of Theranos and her invention . . . people must have questioned things, especially engineers and people in health care and science and medicine, but . . . she’d double down.”

Among the doubters were Holmes’s childhood neighbour, doctor and inventor Richard Fuisz (played by William H. Macy), and Stanford professor of medicine Phyllis Gardner (Laurie Metcalf). In the series, they join with the widow of the Theranos chemist who committed suicide, Ian Gibbons (Stephen Fry), to try to stop Holmes and Theranos, lending their voices to those of the company whistleblowers who fuelled the Wall Street Journal article that was the beginning of the end.

The real Holmes was found guilty in January of defrauding investors but not of defrauding patients, but the series doesn’t lose sight of the fact that ordinary people were harmed by Theranos’ deficient technology. (Holmes is waiting to be sentenced; Balwani has yet to be tried.)

In “The Dropout” we get a fascinating character study and an alarming cautionary tale that is just as compelling as any thriller.

Disney Plus will also stream Steven Spielberg’s Oscar-nominated “West Side Story” remake beginning March 2.

Short Takes

Sandra Oh as Eve Polastri and Jodie Comer as Villanelle in Season 4 of “Killing Eve.”
PHOTO CREDIT: Anika Molnar/BBCA

Killing Eve (Feb. 28, 9 p.m., AMC and AMC Plus)

Revenge and redemption are the themes as this darkly funny drama kicks off its fourth and final season. Ex-MI6 agent Eve (Sandra Oh) and ex-MI6 boss Carolyn (Fiona Shaw) are out to take down the murderous global organization known as the Twelve and avenge the death of Carolyn’s son, Kenny. Meanwhile, ex-professional assassin Villanelle (Jodie Comer) is looking to prove she’s not a monster by taking up with a church group. But can people, particularly remorseless killers, change? Eve certainly has, now working for a private security firm in London and going full bad-ass. Carolyn, meanwhile, has been put out to pasture as a cultural attache but has lost none of her wiles or wit. And Villanelle’s obsession with Eve appears to continue unabated. Camille Cottin is back as Twelve associate Helene while Anjana Vasan (“We Are Lady Parts”) joins the cast as potential assassin Pam. Having seen the first two episodes, in which Oh, Comer and Shaw are all at the top of their games, I anticipate a bloody but extremely entertaining ride to the finish.

Rhys Darby and Fred Armisen in “Our Flag Means Death.” PHOTO CREDIT: Courtesy HBO Max

Our Flag Means Death (March 3, 9 p.m., Crave)

I suspect the real Stede Bonnet — a British sugar plantation owner who abandoned his wife and children to become “the Gentleman Pirate” in 1717 — was a lot less benign than his comedy counterpart. This series created by newbie TV writer David Jenkins portrays Bonnet (played by Rhys Darby of “Flight of the Conchords”) as a fop and esthete with no stomach for violence whose crew is planning to mutiny until he gets lucky and snags a couple of British army captives. Things seem to really be looking up when he crosses paths with the famous Blackbeard (Taika Waititi), who’s grown bored with all the pillaging and is looking for an exit plan. Besides Darby and Waititi, who’s also an executive producer of the show, the cast is packed with well known actors and comedians, including Nat Faxon, Leslie Jones, Fred Armisen, Ewen Bremner of “Trainspotting” and Kristian Nairn of “Game of Thrones.” I’d characterize it as more of a mildly amusing time-waster than a comedy must-see, but it has its moments.

Crave also has Season 3 of the Elena Ferrante adaptation “My Brilliant Friend” (Feb. 28, 10 p.m., HBO) and Season 2 of “Star Trek: Picard” (March 3, 8 p.m., CTV Sci-Fi Channel). Plus, there’s the the debut of “Winning Time: The Rise of the Lakers” (March 6, 9 p.m., HBO), with a stacked cast — John C. Reilly, Adrien Brody, Jason Segel, Sally Field, Gaby Hoffman, Quincy Isaiah and more —portraying the 1980s, Magic Johnson-era Los Angeles Lakers; and the premiere of “Shining Vale” (March 6, 10 p.m., Starz), in which Courteney Cox stars as an unfulfilled wife, mother and author who moves with her family to a small town, into a house with a terrible past.

Jamie Dornan as “the Man” in “The Tourist” PHOTO CREDIT: Prime Video

The Tourist (March 4, Prime Video)

Irish actor Jamie Dornan (“The Fall,” “Belfast”) stars in this six-episode thriller as a man who, after being run off the road in the Australian outback, wakes up in hospital with no memory of who he is. Bad things happen as he travels from place to place following clues to his identity — with the help of cafe waitress Luci (Shalom Brune-Franklin) and probationary constable Helen (Danielle Macdonald) — with bad men after him. But why do people want to kill him and does that mean he himself is a bad person? Our perspective on that changes from episode to episode. In the end, the question becomes whether the man, granted a seemingly clean slate, deserves that second chance. Helen, meanwhile, gets a second chance of her own, blossoming from self-doubt, self-sabotage and subjugation by her needy, controlling fiancé Ethan (Greg Larsen) into an appreciation of her own worth. Macdonald and Dornan ground the mystery and the action in “The Tourist” with emotionally resonant performances that make it easy to invest in their characters. From brothers Harry and Jack Williams (“The Missing,” “Fleabag,” “Liar”), the series is a dynamic, sometimes violent ride that can also be funny as hell.

Sam Heughan and Caitriona Balfe as Jamie and Claire Fraser in “Outlander.” PHOTO CREDIT: Starz

Outlander (March 6, 9 p.m., W Network/StackTV)

It’s a marvel sometimes to think that Claire and Jamie Fraser are still standing after enduring wars, kidnappings, torture, rape and multiple near-death experiences, both his and hers, but the sixth season of the time-travel drama is finally here. It’s been the longest droughtlander yet, a 22-month wait. Has it been worth it? Based on the four episodes I’ve seen, there’s a lot here to engage the hearts and minds of fans. Life on Fraser’s Ridge in North Carolina in 1773 seems nominally peaceful, but Claire (Caitriona Balfe) and Jamie (Sam Heughan) know that the American Revolutionary War is coming and that Jamie will have to choose a side. Claire is still dealing with the trauma of her abduction and sexual assault by Lionel Brown and his men last season, and not in the healthiest of ways. Meanwhile, Fergus (Cesar Domboy) is consumed by guilt that he wasn’t there to protect a pregnant Marsali (Lauren Lyle) from Brown’s men. And there are some tensions with new settlers on the Ridge, including Tom Christie (Mark Lewis Jones), an old rival of Jamie’s from Ardsmuir prison, his daughter Malva (Jessica Reynolds) and son Allan (Alexander Vlahos). Ian Murray (John Bell) has some reckoning of his own to do with events from his time with the Mohawks, while Roger (Richard Rankin) and Brianna (Sophie Skelton) are settling back into life in the 1700s after last season’s failed attempt to go back to their own time. Season 6 has just eight episodes instead of the usual 12 to 16, but I expect they’re going to be jam-packed. And if you’ve read the books, you know there’s more hardship ahead for Jamie and Claire.

Odds and Ends

“Carbon: The Unauthorized Biography” highlights the element’s presence in every living thing.
PHOTO CREDIT: CBC

“The Nature of Things” continues its quest to bring scientific facts to the masses with “Carbon: The Unauthorized Biography” (March 4, 9 p.m., CBC and CBC Gem). The doc anthropomorphizes the element, using the voice of Sarah Snook of “Succession,” highlighting its importance as a building block of all life, as well as inanimate matter, but also its destructiveness as carbon dioxide overwhelms the planet.

This week’s Netflix offerings include the thriller series “Pieces of Her” (March 3), an adaptation of the 2018 novel in which a daughter (Bella Heathcote) tries to suss out her mother’s (Toni Collette) violent past; the docuseries “Worst Roommate Ever” (March 1), true stories about actual roommates from hell; and the reality series “Making Fun” (March 4), in which Jimmy DiResta and pals make children’s weird ideas for inventions into actual things.

If you’re a “Big Brother Canada” fan, the competition is back for a 10th season — where the heck did the time go? — March 2 at 8 p.m. on Global and StackTV.

Speaking of long-lived series, Season 9 of the romantic period drama “When Calls the Heart” is on Super Channel Heart & Home on March 6 at 8 p.m.

FX debuts the fifth and final season of the critically acclaimed family comedy “Better Things” on Feb. 28 at 10 p.m.

Here’s one I would have loved to screen but just could not get to: the BritBox original “Murder in Provence” (March 1), starring Roger Allan of “Endeavour” and Nancy Carroll of “Father Brown.”

And finally, if you’d like to see a young(ish) Canadian lad make good, Toronto tenor Conor Murphy (who has sung the national anthem for the Toronto Maple Leafs, including the night Zamboni driver David Ayres was in goal) is one of three singers featured in the special “Trinity: Classically Irish” on PBS March 6 at 3:30 p.m. (it repeats March 8 at 8 p.m.).

NOTE: The listings here are in Eastern Standard Time and I’ve verified the times where possible, but it’s always best to check listings for your own area. The selection of programs reviewed reflects what I’m given access to by networks and streamers, whether reviews are embargoed, how many shows I have time to watch and my own personal taste. The Odds and Ends section includes shows that I have not watched.

Clayton psychoanalyzes his way to a final four on ‘The Bachelor’

Teddi, Susie, Gabby, Rachel, Serene and Sarah celebrate “The Bachelor” moving the circus to Vienna. PHOTO CREDIT: All photos screen grabs, with apologies for the quality

I’ll be darned, the “Bachelor” producers flipped a switch on the Claytonbot 3000 and Clayton Echard actually made some sensible decisions on Monday’s episode.

First up was sending Mara home. It turns out she probably had a point about Sarah, but the way she went on and on about it ad nauseam was totally annoying and she had to go.

As for Sarah, it seems Shanae wasn’t the only one who was good at fake crying. Clayton decided Sarah wasn’t there for the right reasons, not because she was 23 but because he thought she was making shit up. So buh bye Sarah.

This doesn’t mean the episode was void of annoyances but, when all was said and done, Clayton had a final four. Bring on the hometowns and let’s get this ridiculous season over with.

But first, shall we recap?

Mara’s contempt for Sarah was written all over her face.

We had unfinished business from last week. You’ll recall that Mara, being super jealous that Sarah got a second one-on-one date — and truthfully, the only reason she got it was to piss Mara off — implied to Clayton that Sarah wasn’t ready to get engaged. And Clayton confronted Sarah, who cried copious tears — although I’m now wondering just how real they were — and they kissed and made up and she got a rose and marched back to the hotel to confront whoever had thrown her under the bus.

It didn’t take long for Mara to fess up that she was the one who talked to Clayton, although she framed it more as her looking out for him than her being green with envy that she, Mara, 32-year-old self-proclaimed bedroom and kitchen goddess, was being left on the shelf for a youngster.

Was Sarah overconfident? Sure, especially in light of what happened later in the episode. Was all this sniping just another useless detour into Dramaland? Of course.

But Sarah was also correct when she identified Mara’s manoeuvring as “a last ditch effort by someone who feels like they’re going home.” Because guess what? Mara went home at the rose ceremony, along with Eliza.

For the seven who were left — Susie, Serene, Gabby, Genevieve, Rachel, Teddi and Sarah — it was goodbye Hvar, Croatia; hello Vienna, Austria.

Once there, it was time for the ever popular princess date. And I have to say it is nice to see people go places and do things in picturesque locations, and not have fake ass dates that all happen inside a resort.

First Susie got to go shopping at some fancy store called Fisher’s, and production bought her bandage dresses and Louboutins and who knows what else since she walked out of there with at least 10 bags.

Susie got the season’s princess date, complete with designer gown.

Next stop was the atelier of designer Eva Poleschinski, where Susie got to pick out a ballgown to wear to dinner with Clayton at Schonbrunn Palace. And one wonders how much pressure was brought to bear to get her to pick the red dress since dinner was followed by Chris de Burgh (go ahead and google him young’uns) performing his 1986 hit “The Lady in Red.”

Hey, at least it wasn’t country music.

It certainly does feel like Susie is pulling ahead of the pack. And no, I haven’t read the spoilers nor do I care to. Nor have I done a scientific survey of how many women who get the princess or “Cinderella” date also end up with the final rose, but I know eventual winner Rachel Kirkconnell got it on Matt James’ season.

Susie reiterated that she was falling in love with Clayton and I did worry a little when he talked about seeing “so many sides of Susie” and the only ones he mentioned were the funny one, the serious one and the romantic one.

I will, however, grudgingly admit it was kind of sweet when Clayton said that if you took all the fancy princess-in-the-castle trappings away Susie “would still make me smile just as big.”

Doesn’t matter what we think anyway; Susie’s smitten, she got the rose, Clayton’s meeting her folks.

So what’s the opposite of a Cinderella date? How about taking five women to be psychoanalyzed on TV by a total stranger?

Sarah, Teddi, Genevieve, Rachel and Gabby had to endure couples therapy with Clayton, which is pretty rich since none of them are yet part of a couple. It was just another means to get the women to unearth private trauma for our public entertainment.

Genevieve has an uncomfortable — and pointless — therapy session with Clayton.

The most traumatized of all was Genevieve, although it was the therapy session that was causing her pain.

“I don’t like talking about my feelings and I don’t like being emotional in front of people, especially crying,” said Genevieve.

“Try to express what you feel,” said the psychoanalyst, clearly well coached by the producers.

“I want to understand who you are,” added Clayton, promoting the fiction that if Genevieve just fessed up there could be a hometown date in her future.

What utter nonsense. It wouldn’t have mattered if Genevieve spilled every deep feeling she’d ever had, she was never going to get a hometown rose.

Mercifully, Clayton ended the charade and sent Genevieve home, bizarrely thanking her for “making this journey fun,” a real non sequitur under the circumstances.

And then there was Sarah, who said she loved therapy. She happily cried in front of the psychoanalyst while recounting how the other women tried to tear her down. Clayton babbled that his and Sarah’s trust was now “on a whole other level,” so Sarah’s confidence shot to a whole other level, too. Hell yeah, she was getting a hometown date, she figured.

But then the psychoanalyst told Clayton and his dates that someone hadn’t been honest about their feelings: “performative” was what she said.

Dun dun dun dunnnnn.

At the after party, Clayton invited the women to essentially snitch on the dishonest person.

It turns out there was a thorn in Sarah’s rose after all.

Rachel recounted Sarah coming to her and Teddi after her first one-on-one date to say she and Clayton “were crying together,” which Clayton said wasn’t true. Apparently, Sarah had blabbed so many details about her close connection to Clayton that Teddi and Rachel considered sending themselves home.

When Clayton accused Sarah of being manipulative, she denied everything while doing her best imitation of a crying face.

“I’m just gonna be real with you. I really felt like you were trying to fake cry to me,” Clayton told Sarah, which was spot on.

I guess the difference between Sarah and Shanae was that Shanae had mastered the ability to squeeze actual tears out of her eyes whereas Sarah’s cheeks stayed dry.

Tellingly, her eyes continued to stay dry in the van that whisked her away when Clayton sent her home.

He declined to hand out a group date rose.

The next day, Serene — on her second one-on-one — kicked things off by making sure Clayton was OK after the, um, trauma of sending Sarah home.

What Clayton and Serene lacked in rhythm they made up for in enthusiasm.

Somehow he managed to soldier on as he and Serene toured Vienna’s city centre in a horse-drawn carriage, ate hot chestnuts and danced to accordion music with the obligatory senior citizen couple who gave them a glimpse of their own potential future — yes, that’s right, you too can spend your golden years trying to teach people from some random reality show how to polka.

At dinner later, at the Belvedere Palace, Serene confessed she hadn’t brought anyone home to meet her parents since her high school boyfriend. And she and Clayton compared notes about growing apart from people that you started dating when you were really young and how it can seem like you wasted part of your 20s, but “then I think, no, you learn from every moment that you go through,” Clayton said.

And I’m sorry, but that sounded like an actual line of conversation rather than just a talking point.

Serene told Clayton she was falling in love with him, which made Clayton grin from ear to ear. And he gave her the rose and then they stood in front of the famous Klimt painting “The Kiss” and, duh, kissed.

And then — I can hardly believe I’m writing this — the episode ended with a rose ceremony.

Rachel, Teddi and Gabby await their fate alongside Susie and Serene.

Since Susie and Serene already had roses, and Rachel was a lock for another one, it came down to Teddi and Gabby.

As the first impression rose winner, Teddi might have seemed like a shoo-in but, to be honest, the fact she had her one-on-one so late in the season did not bode well. And indeed, she was the one sent home.

Clayton didn’t seem all that broken up about it, telling her, “It was so nice to get to know you and you’ll forever have a special place in my heart” as he handed her into the van. Not one for long goodbyes is Clayton.

But let’s be honest, he did Teddi — and us — a favour. How nasty would it have been if Teddi lost her virginity to Clayton and then had to suffer through the “I’ve been intimate with both of you” speech that we all know is coming? Consider it a bullet dodged.

Next week it’s hometowns and, if we don’t get tripped up with any special two-part episodes, we just have another four to go and we can all get our Monday nights back.

You can watch next Monday at 8 p.m. on Citytv. And you can comment here, visit my Facebook page or follow me on Twitter @realityeo

Watchable Feb. 21 to 27, 2022

SHOW OF THE WEEK: The Porter (Feb. 21, 9 p.m., CBC and CBC Gem)

Arnold Pinnock, co-creator and executive producer of “The Porter,” as Glenford. PHOTO CREDIT: CBC

Marsha Greene, one of the co-creators of “The Porter,” says the historical drama is about aspiration and ambition. She was talking about the dreams of its characters when she told me that in an interview, but she could as well have been describing the people who made this show happen.

“The Porter” is indeed aspirational and ambitious and, more importantly, has seen those ambitions realized, based on the two episodes I’ve watched and rewatched. It’s something of a unicorn in homegrown television, a series that tells a Black Canadian story with a majority Black cast and creative team.

This is a richly drawn portrait of not only a time and place in Canadian history, but a substantial world whose Black characters live nuanced, complicated lives. We see not only the trains where the porters attend obsequiously to the white passengers — “the most invisible (men) on the Earth,” Junior (Aml Ameen) calls them — but the Black community of St. Antoine, Montreal (also known as Little Burgundy), where the porters are respected and admired.

You can tell that every detail of the series has been thoughtfully conceived and honed, from the writing and performances, directing and cinematography, to the set, costume design and soundtrack. It all comes together in an absorbing story rooted in the 1920s but relatable to the here and now.

Ameen, a British actor, and Ronnie Rowe Jr., a Toronto actor most recently seen on the bridge of “Star Trek: Discovery,” are porters Junior Massey and Zeke Garrett, friends and World War I veterans. A tragedy involving a fellow porter sets them on opposing paths: Zeke to try to win improvements in working conditions through unionization; Junior to try to improve his financial condition by smuggling whisky to Prohibition-era Chicago, where their train makes regular runs.

Their stories intersect those of the other lead characters: Marlene (Mouna Traore), Junior’s wife and a Black Cross nurse; Miss Queenie (Olunike Adeliyi), a Chicago gangster of whom Junior runs afoul; and Lucy (Loren Lott), a performer and bartender at the Stardust nightclub who aspires to fame in New York City.

Arnold Pinnock and Bruce Ramsay, who originated “The Porter,” also play parts as porter Glenford and conductor Dinger, while celebrated American actor Alfre Woodard portrays brothel owner Fay.

Those brief character sketches barely scratch the surface of everything that happens in Season 1. While I’ve only seen two episodes, I’ve read ahead about the other six and it’s clear there’s much more story to come should “The Porter”be granted subsequent seasons.

Canada doesn’t mine its history — let alone its Black history — for TV drama the way some other countries do. The last Canadian historical drama I recall that told a specifically Black story was the miniseries “The Book of Negroes” (2015), which is set in America and Africa as much as Canada.

By breathing vibrant life into an overlooked portion of the country’s past, “The Porter” has set a standard that hopefully other Canadian creators will emulate.

BLK: An Origin Story (Feb. 26, 9 p.m., History and StackTV)

Screen grab from the trailer for “BLK: An Original Story.” PHOTO CREDIT: History/YouTube

Chances are you’ve heard of the Tulsa Race Massacre, when over two days a white mob burned down the Black community of Greenwood in Tulsa, Oklahoma, and killed as many as 300 people. Ever heard of the Shelburne Race Riot in Nova Scotia?

No lives were lost, but the white rabble there inflicted 10 days of terror, beating Black people and destroying their homes. Why? Because a Black preacher named David George baptized a white woman. And the intent in Shelburne was the same as that in Tulsa: to put Black people in their place.

This is one of the bits of history — Canadian history, not just Black history — elucidated in “BLK: An Origin Story,” a four-part docuseries that traces the presence of Black people in this country as far back as the 1700s.

The first episode, the one I watched, covers the migration of three groups of Black settlers to Nova Scotia beginning in 1783; the second, Black and Indigenous War of 1812 vet John “Daddy” Hall of Owen Sound; the third, the Hogan’s Alley community that began in Vancouver in the 1850s; the fourth, Little Burgundy, the Montreal neighbourhood that is the setting of “The Porter.”

Listen, we all know that history documentaries sometimes seem like things we should watch rather than things we want to watch, but my attention didn’t flag once while I watched this one. Not only is the subject matter interesting, it’s delivered by a lively assortment of mainly Black Canadian experts, not just academics but poets like George Elliot Clarke and El Jones, and authors like Lawrence Hill.

There’s so much I didn’t know: that besides being populated by Black Loyalists escaping the American Revolution (the people whose names were entered in “The Book of Negroes,” source of the CBC miniseries mentioned above and the Hill novel it was based on), Nova Scotia also became home to “maroons,” self-liberated Jamaicans who were forcibly deported after they battled the British colonizers there, as well as Black veterans who supported the British in the War of 1812. Or that the maroons helped build or rebuild some key edifices in Halifax, including Citadel Hill and Government House. Or that Nova Scotia schools weren’t officially desegregated until the 1950s although the last Blacks-only school didn’t close until 1983.

It’s all covered in more detail than I can do justice to in this post.

What wasn’t in the least surprising was the discrimination so-called “free” Blacks faced when they arrived, often denied the land they had been promised for their service to the British, left at the mercy of white settlers to earn livings and feed their families, to the point that many of the Black settlers fled Nova Scotia for Sierra Leone.

The popular narrative of Canada as it relates to its Black population tends to be fixated on the Underground Railroad: Canada as a shining beacon to those escaping enslavement in the southern U.S. But as art historian and researcher Charmaine Nelson says, “We’ve enshrined in our curriculum a 31-year history when we were abolitionists, and obliterated, ignored and erased our two-century history of slaving.”

Sure, that’s an indictment of our smug sense of superiority to our American neighbours — already shot to hell by the convoy protests in Ottawa — but it’s also an opportunity for honest reflection.

Personally, I’m all for Canadians learning more about the history of this country and not just the parts that play into our overblown reputation for being nice.

History also has the three-part miniseries “Abraham Lincoln” starting Feb. 21 at 9 p.m., an examination of the life of the U.S. president as well as his attitudes toward slavery. It’s part documentary and part dramatization, with Graham Sibley playing Lincoln.

Short Takes

Frida Gustavsson as Freydis and Sam Corlett as Leif in “Vikings: Valhalla.”
PHOTO CREDIT: Bernard Walsh/Netflix

Vikings: Valhalla (Feb. 25, Netflix)

If the end of the TV series “Vikings” in 2020 left you hankering for heroic quests, Norse accents and people dressed in leather and furs, this show inspired by Michael Hirst’s original should scratch that itch. Hirst is an executive producer on this one, created by movie writer Jeb Stuart (“Die Hard,” “The Fugitive”). It shifts the action 100 years past the previous series and focuses on relative youngsters Leif Eriksson (Sam Corlett), son of Erik the Red; his sister Freydis (Frida Gustavsson) and Prince Harald Sigurdsson (Leo Suter). “Valhalla” returns to Kattegat, now ruled by Jarl Haakon (Caroline Henderson), and to Uppsala, where Haakon sends Freydis on a pilgrimage. Leif and Harald, meanwhile, head to England to avenge the St. Brice’s Day Massacre, which in the show — if not in actual history — is the destruction of all Viking settlements in England by King Aethelred II. But the campaign is complicated by tension between Vikings like Leif who believe in the old gods and those who have converted to Christianity, including Harald’s half-brother Olaf (Johannes Haukur Johannesson).

Netflix also has “RACE: Bubba Wallace” (Feb. 22), a docuseries about the only full-time Black NASCAR driver.

The Moonrunners urban dance crew in “Why We Dance.” PHOTO CREDIT: CBC

Why We Dance (Feb. 25, 9 p.m., CBC and CBC Gem)

For a few glorious months in Grade 4 (or was it 5?), I was an aspiring ballet dancer, complete with my first pair of toe shoes. And then the free lessons at school ended and the toe shoes got put away in a chest, but that enduring love of dance is why I give things like this documentary a second look. As part of “The Nature of Things,” filmmaker Nathalie Bibeau (“The Walrus and the Whistleblower”) examines the human impulse to dance, what purposes it serves and which other species can move to a beat, which might ring a bell if you’ve watched videos of Snowball the cockatoo. Human dancers strut their stuff here too, including members of Toronto Indigenous troupe Red Sky Performance.

Odds and Ends

Zoey (Soleil Moon Frye), Penny (Kyla Pratt), Michael (EJ Johnson) and Dijonay (Karen Malina White)
in “The Proud Family: Louder and Prouder.” PHOTO CREDIT: Disney

Disney’s big debut this week is the revival of its early aughts animated series “The Proud Family.” “The Proud Family: Louder and Prouder” (Feb. 23, Disney Plus) focuses on an older version of Penny Proud (Kyla Pratt), as well as her friends and family, while expanding to include LGBTQ characters. The movie thriller “No Exit” also premieres under the Disney Plus Star banner, on Feb. 25.

HBO and Crave have the documentary “Frederick Douglass: In Five Speeches” (Feb. 23, 9 p.m.), in which five of the anti-slavery activist’s speeches are highlighted by five Black actors: Nicole Beharie, Colman Domingo, Jonathan Majors, Denzel Whitaker and Jeffrey Wright. Also premiering on Crave are “Super Pumped: The Battle for Uber” (Feb. 27, 10 p.m.), the first instalment of a Showtime anthology series starring Joseph Gordon-Levitt, Uma Thurman and Kyle Chandler; and the Clint Eastwood film “Cry Macho” (Feb. 26, 9 p.m.).

Lifetime has the docuseries “Janet Jackson” (Feb. 26, 8 p.m.), which claims to be an unfiltered look at her “untold story.”

Prime Video, meanwhile, has another music documentary with “Charli XCX: Alone Together” (Feb. 24), showing the pop star making an album with the help of fans while quarantined at home during the pandemic.

PBS’s “Nova” is highlighting people with disabilities with “Augmented” (Feb. 23, 9 p.m.), about biophysicist Hugh Herr, who lost his legs in an accident at 17 and became an inventor of better prosthetic limbs; and “Predicting My MS” (Feb. 23, 10 p.m.), which follows filmmaker Jason DaSilva and how he handles his diagnosis of primary progressive multiple sclerosis.

Finally, BritBox has a second season of the Scottish crime drama “Traces” (Feb. 22), which stars Molly Windsor as a forensic lab assistant hoping to solve her mother’s long-ago murder, and co-stars Laura Fraser (“The Loch,” “Breaking Bad”) as her boss; Martin Compston (“Line of Duty”) as her boyfriend and Canadian Jennifer Spence as a prickly professor of forensic anthropology.

With Shanae gone, Mara picks up the villain torch on The Bachelor

Monday’s episode of “The Bachelor” was about as hard to swallow as the fish eyes and other unpalatable things eaten on the group date. PHOTO CREDIT: All photos screen grabs unless otherwise indicated

Is it possible for a person to be possessed by the spirit of someone who’s still alive?

I’m just asking because no sooner had Shanae been kicked off “The Bachelor” — finally! — then Mara went on a jealousy and insecurity rampage that culminated in her trying to get rid of Sarah.

This is all part of the evil producer plan, of course: stoke Mara’s self-doubt by ensuring she gets the very last rose at the rose ceremony, then send the woman she’s most threatened by on a second one-on-one date while Mara is stuck in group date purgatory. Presto chango, a new villain!

It wouldn’t surprise me in the least if it turned out that Mara — perhaps realizing her chances of getting a one-on-one were about as good as the women ceasing to over-pronounce the “t” in Clayton — signed up for the villain edit.

And Clayton continues to be the perfect producer stooge, dutifully confronting Sarah with Mara’s accusation that she wasn’t ready to get engaged, feigning confusion, then stepping away “to think this through,” leaving Sarah a sobbing mess. That doesn’t seem like something you would do to someone you claim to see a future with but, at this stage, it appears that when the producers say “Jump!” Clayton doesn’t even ask how high; he just leaps.

The women said that Clayton sending Shanae home showed he’s not a bad judge of character after all. Too bad viewers can’t share that perspective.

If anything, the result of the two-on-one between Shanae and Genevieve showed that Clayton has been playing the game all along.

Genevieve Parisi and Shanae Ankney wait for Clayton Echard to give one of them the rose.

Consider that up until this point Clayton has appeared to swallow all of Shanae’s whoppers hook, line and sinker. And now, suddenly, he draws the line?

Shanae did what she’s done all along: lied (she claimed to have overheard Genevieve saying she wanted to go home the night before) and faked emotion (tearing up because she’d been single for five years and, at 29, had never been in love). And then she exulted at pulling one over on Clayton: “Getting this rose tonight is gonna feel better than sex.”

Genevieve appeared to cry real tears while basically apologizing to Clayton for not being vulnerable enough. Ugh.

Clayton asked Genevieve point blank, with Shanae sitting there, “Are you an actress” — Shanae’s word — “and have you been lying to me?” A startled Genevieve said no and then asked Clayton why he’d ask her that.

Instead of answering, he walked away for a little think, no doubt counting down the minutes until he was allowed to stop pretending, and go back and hand out the rose, which he said was “going to somebody who helped me see the truth in all of this.”

“So Shanae, I’m just, I’m so sorry, but I cannot find it in my heart to give you this rose.”

And just like that, Shanae’s five-week reign of terror came to an end. I have to be honest, it felt way longer.

“Fuck Clayton. I never want to see him again,” Shanae said, which sums up how viewers feel about her. I’m sure more than one member of Bachelor Nation was popping Champagne along with Shanae’s fellow contestants.

With Shanae gone, all seemed to be sweetness and light at the cocktail party on rose ceremony night. Clayton was sucking face with his favourites Sarah and Rachel. He even kissed Hunter. But Mara, an entrepreneur from New Jersey, was fretting that Clayton didn’t know what a “keeper” she was. She only got about three minutes with him and spent that time force-feeding him what looked like cold poutine.

Mara Agrait was ready to fall in love in Croatia, come hell or high water.

“I am a grown ass woman. I know what I have to offer and I know who I am, and I came here to find love,” she ranted before breaking down in tears.

Translation: I am 32 years old. I am ready to get married and start churning out little Echards. Why does Clayton like women who are younger than me?

Listen, nothing against someone who really wants to be coupled up, but if Mara is as “strong, powerful, passionate, independent” as she claims, perhaps she could ratchet down the desperation.

She finally got her rose after Sarah, Serene, Susie, Teddi and Eliza had got theirs, with Marlena and Hunter sent home.

And then it was time for Clayton and his chosen nine, including Rachel, Gabby and Genevieve, to leave Toronto and head to Hvar, Croatia, where Mara’s complaining continued apace.

When Teddi got the first one-on-one — and come on, she was the first impression rose winner; she should have got one way before now — Mara sniped that some of the women were more girlfriend than wife material and that Clayton was doing himself a “disservice” by not availing himself of Mara’s awesomeness.

Anyway, Teddi and Clayton were off on the ever popular “let’s walk around this town and do the most cheesy, touristy things possible” date, followed by the standard true confessions dinner.

Clayton and Teddi Wright, but not in Croatia, because apparently ABC
couldn’t find any photographers in Croatia. PHOTO CREDIT: John Fleenor/ABC

Teddi told Clayton that she was — gasp! — a virgin and Clayton’s response was a master class in awkwardness. First he told her that he “would have never known” since there was physical attraction between them. Then he hastened to add that their connection was more emotional. And then he asked, “Have you been in love since that point?”

First off, what point? Secondly, since Teddi said she was saving herself until the first time she was in love, clearly she had never been in love because, if she had, she wouldn’t be a virgin.

Clayton blathered about how he wanted Teddi to be “fully vulnerable” — and is there a double entendre in there somewhere? — and Teddi said she trusted Clayton and felt safe with him.

He gave her the rose and they kissed just like people who aren’t virgins do, and Teddi said she could see herself falling in love with Clayton and best not to let your mind go there.

In the meantime, when Mara found out she was on the group date along with Serene, Rachel, Susie, Gabby, Eliza and Genevieve, and that 23-year-old Sarah was getting a second one-on-one, she bemoaned Clayton “going for the youngest girl in the house, who I couldn’t imagine being ready to get engaged.”

And look, I’m a lot older than Mara, but this a bullshit, ageist argument. Chronological age is not a guarantee of readiness for anything. My mother got married at 18 and she’ll be celebrating her 62nd wedding anniversary this year. Besides, the most immature woman on the show so far has been Shanae at 29.

But Mara put on her game face during the group date, which involved the women donning medieval armour-type outfits and being led through challenges by a female knight named Katarina (at least I think that’s how it’s spelled).

Mara figured she had the competition in the bag because she out-muscled Rachel in the strength challenge; chowed down on pig’s liver and cow’s stomach and fish eyes and other, um, delicacies; and, as a sign of her devotion to Clayton, recited a poem that included the lines “I cook and clean and I’m great in bed/Come on Clayton, use your head.”

Personally, I preferred Genevieve’s “I endured an epic war against the evil shrimp dragon.”

In any event, Serene was declared to have the virtues of a true knight, which meant she got to wear a cape and smooch Clayton.

At the after-party, Mara complained to Clayton that she’d been “vulnerable, sweet, cute, flirty” but still hadn’t got a one-on-one. Furthermore, Clayton was wasting his time on younger women like Sarah, one of whom Mara alleged — OK, she meant Sarah — had said she couldn’t picture herself engaged after just a couple of months.

But Mara speaking her “truth” was no match for Rachel telling Clayton she was falling for him, so no date rose for Mara.

Susie Evans in “beast” mode ahead of her impromptu clock tower date with Clayton.

Mara was miffed, so when Clayton got an unsigned card saying “Meet me at the clock tower,” it seemed like Mara might have more to say. (Some people even speculated it was Shanae taking another kick at the can.) It was just Susie, who became the second woman to tell Clayton she was falling in love with him.

And then, finally, it was time to emotionally torture Sarah.

After first having a staged pep talk with host Jesse Palmer about his “biggest fear” potentially coming true, Clayton dropped the bomb on Sarah that she’d been called out for possibly not being ready to get engaged and thus, he was “confused” and “scared.”

Sarah Hamrick before Clayton dropped Mara’s “truth” bomb on her.

Sarah began to cry and to strenuously object, saying she absolutely wanted to get engaged to Clayton. And then Clayton left her there at the table, bereft, to step away to think, which was obviously a bit of producer manipulation.

In the meantime, Sarah cried her eyes out. She was still crying when Clayton came back to the table, telling him she was afraid to lose him over a “blatant lie.”

Well, of course, she wasn’t going to lose him. It was just some bullshit drama. Sure enough, Clayton told Sarah that he was sure she was there for him and “you want what I’m after.” Sarah cried on his shoulder after he gave her the damn rose.

Cue Sarah, mad as hell, heading back to the hotel suite to confront the “liar” and the words “To be continued” on the screen. So there’s more Mara and Sarah drama ahead next week and is this bloody season over yet?

You can watch Monday at 8 p.m. on Citytv. And you can comment here, visit my Facebook page or follow me on Twitter @realityeo

Watchable Feb. 14 to 20, 2022

SHOW OF THE WEEK: Severance (Feb. 18, Apple TV Plus)

From left, Tramell Tillman, Zach Cherry, John Turturro, Britt Lower and Adam Scott in “Severance.” PHOTO CREDIT: Apple TV Plus

The term “workplace thriller” seems like an oxymoron, but there are indeed thrills to be had in this series about a mysterious company whose employees undergo brain surgery to divide their work and personal lives.

The first question that comes to mind is why anyone would want to undergo such a radical procedure. In the case of main character Mark (Adam Scott), it’s to minimize the pain of his wife’s death, a loss that left him unable to do his previous job as a history professor.

When we first meet Mark (Adam Scott), he’s crying in the parking lot of Lumon Corporation. By the time he has taken the elevator down to the macro-data refinement or MDR department, he’s wondering why he has a crumpled tissue in his pocket and whether the fact he’s sniffling means he’s getting a cold.

The controversial “severance” procedure, which involves implanting a chip into its subjects’ brains, means that employees have no memories of their personal lives when they’re at work and none of their work lives when they’re at home. The split selves are designated “innies” and “outies” by the company.

It isn’t explicitly stated why this would be considered desirable by the corporation — a corporation that doesn’t appear to make anything of tangible use to the outside world — but clearly the idea is to produce compliant workers, unfettered by the emotional entanglements of their home lives.

But humans have a way of pushing against boundaries.

The trouble starts with new employee Helly (Britt Lower), who refuses to go passively to her assignment in MDR when she awakens after her severance procedure. When her request to resign is denied she comes up with ever more drastic ploys to escape what she calls hell, to the point that Mark — the new department chief since his friend Petey (Yul Vazquez) suddenly disappeared — begins to question Lumon’s methods.

The rebellion spreads, even to by-the-book veteran Irv (John Turturro) and ultra-competitive Dylan (Zach Cherry), whose main interest is in racking up company perks.

Irv begins to stray after a chance meeting with Burt (Christopher Walken), the chief of the optics and design department. Their shared appreciation for the company art — paintings featuring founder Kier Eagan — grows into something deeper.

Deterrents like the psychological punishment of the “break room” and a new security door — installed on the orders of coldly forbidding boss Harmony Cobel (Patricia Arquette) and her henchmen — can’t keep Mark and his co-workers from wandering the long, white halls in search of information and companionship.

Directors Ben Stiller, who also executive produces, and Aoife McArdle do an excellent job of rendering the sleek, sterile and vaguely threatening environment inside Lumon, contrasting it with the outside world, which is bleak in its own ways.

Eventually, outer life begins to contaminate inner life and vice versa, whether it’s a forbidden book left in the conference room or Petey turning up in the non-Lumon world.

Then Dylan makes an inadvertent discovery, a way that his co-workers’ “innies” might be able to glimpse their “outie” selves. The MDR team comes up with a risky plan whose execution produces the thrills I mentioned previously. It yields some answers but also raises even more questions — ones that will presumably be answered in Season 2.

Despite its sci-fi trappings, “Severance” is a very human story.

Lumon’s attempt to play god can’t squelch human curiosity or the need for connection; the drive to know yourself and others. Likewise, our desire to know more about these characters propels us through the series.

Apple also has the docuseries “Lincoln’s Dilemma” (Feb. 18), which aims to give a more nuanced portrait of the American president and his position on ending slavery.

Short Takes

Olly Sholotan as Carlton Banks and Jabari Banks as Will in “Bel-Air.”
PHOTO CREDIT: Evans Vestal Ward/Peacock)

Bel-Air (Feb. 14, 9 p.m., Showcase and StackTV)

This reboot of beloved 1990s sitcom “The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air” puts dramatic meat on the bones of a street-wise West Philly kid moving in with his wealthy relatives in the posh Los Angeles neighbourhood. The “one little fight” that got Will (played by Jabari Banks here) packed off to Bel-Air is now a beef with a gang member that sees Will point a gun and get arrested. When his mother sends him to live with his Aunt Viv (Cassandra Freeman) and Uncle Phillip (Adrian Holmes), it’s because his life is being threatened, a threat that continues to hang over him and his best friend back home. Cousin Carlton (Olly Sholotan) is Will’s enemy in this show, at least in the three episodes available for review. A popular lacrosse player who snorts Xanax to control his anxiety, Carlton’s dominance of his snobby, majority white high school is threatened not only by Will’s prowess on the basketball court but his pursuit of Carlton’s ex Lisa (Simone Joy Jones), which brings the cousins to physical blows. There’s a lot more: Phillip is still a lawyer but is now running to be elected district attorney; Viv is an art school teacher who gave up her promising art career for her family; Hilary (Coco Jones) is an influencer and aspiring chef whose disinterest in a traditional job rankles her mother. There’s also younger sister Ashley (Akira Akbar); house manager Geoffrey (Jimmy Akingbola) and jack-of-all-trades Jazz (Jordan L. Jones), who meets Will driving him from the airport. The show’s mix of soap opera-worthy plot lines with serious themes relating to Black identity works if you’re not looking for anything too deep or nuanced.

Natalie Martinez and Matt Lauria in “Down.” PHOTO CREDIT: Courtesy of Hollywood Suite

Into the Dark (Feb. 14, 9 p.m., Hollywood Suite)

This anthology film series carries the imprimatur of Blumhouse Television, whose movie arm is known for hits like “Paranormal Activity” and “The Purge.” The conceit here is that the horror films are all linked to holidays. Fittingly, the Valentine’s Day kickoff features two instalments ostensibly tied to romance, “Down” and “My Valentine.” In “Down,” which I screened, two office workers (Natalie Martinez and Matt Lauria) are trapped in an elevator in an empty building on Valentine’s weekend. But the ordeal turns deadly beyond the deprivation of being stuck without food and water in a small space.

From left, Tom Green, Jay Baruchel, Mae Martin, Debra DiGiovanni, Jon Lajoie, Brandon Ash-Mohammed, Caroline Rhea, Colin Mochrie and Dave Foley on “LOL: Last One Laughing Canada.”
PHOTO CREDIT: Amazon Studios

LOL: Last One Laughing Canada (Feb. 18, Prime Video)

For its first Canadian reality series, Amazon’s Prime Video has chosen a spinoff of its own international hit. The “Last One Laughing” franchise is a bit like a comedic version of “Big Brother,” with 10 comedians put in a room for six hours with cameras catching their every utterance. The goal is to crack up their fellow comics while remaining straight-faced themselves. Whoever wins gets bragging rights and $100,000 for the charity of their choice. This first Canadian season boasts an embarrassment of riches. Jay Baruchel hosts while the competitors include standups Deborah DiGiovanni and Brandon Ash-Mohammed, TV stars Andrew Phung of “Kim’s Convenience,” K. Trevor Wilson of “Letterkenny,” Caroline Rhea of “Sabrina, the Teenage Witch” and Mae Martin of “Feel Good”; Quebec YouTube celeb Jon Lajoie: and revered veterans Colin Mochrie, Tom Green and “Kid in the Hall” Dave Foley. The fun, besides having that much Canadian comedy talent in one room, is in seeing who cracks first. If a comedian laughs or even smiles, Baruchel hits them with a yellow card; a second infraction gets them bounced from the contest. I’m not gonna lie, the first episode got off to a slow start, but then the cast started to hit their stride. I have never laughed so hard at the sight of someone making grilled cheese sandwiches. One note: if you’re offended by profanity, just know this is loaded with f-bombs.

Prime Video also has Season 4 of “The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel” (Feb. 18), a show I love and would have loved to review if not for an embargo.

Odds and Ends

Kanye West as seen in “jeen-yuhs: A Kanye Trilogy.” PHOTO CREDIT: Netflix

The docuseries “jeen-yuhs: A Kanye Trilogy” (Feb. 16, Netflix) spans 20 years in the life and career of Kanye West, now known as Ye. Directed by Chike Ozah and Clarence “Coodie” Simmons, it got mostly favourable reviews when it premiered at Sundance in January. Screeners weren’t provided by Netflix. Netflix also has Season 2 of reality series “Swap Shop” (Feb. 16) and Season 2 of Steve Carell comedy “Space Force” (Feb. 18).

If you’d like to see the work of Canadian filmmaker Jean-Marc Vallee, who died Christmas Day, before he got famous for titles like “Dallas Buyers Club,” “Big Little Lies” and “Sharp Objects,” CBC Gem has his 2011 romance “Cafe de Flore” screening on Feb. 14.

Sundance Now has a new season of Nick Hornby’s anthology series “State of the Union” (Feb. 14). This time, veteran actors Brendan Gleeson and Patricia Clarkson star as a couple trying to save their 30-year marriage. Stephen Frears returns to direct.

New to Disney Plus this week are the animated special “The Wonderful Winter of Mickey Mouse” (Feb. 18) and “Marvel Studios: Assembled — The Making of ‘Eternals'” (Feb. 16).

Crave has Season 2 of possibly the chillest unscripted series in the world, “Painting With John” (Feb. 18, 11 p.m., HBO/Crave), in which artist, musician, actor and director John Lurie paints and talks, sharing lessons from his estimable life.

This post was edited to tweak my review of “Bel-Air.”

NOTE: The listings here are in Eastern Standard Time and I’ve verified the times where possible, but it’s always best to check listings for your own area. The selection of programs reviewed reflects what I’m given access to by networks and streamers, whether reviews are embargoed, how many shows I have time to watch and my own personal taste. The Odds and Ends section includes shows that I have not watched.

The joke’s on Bachelor viewers as Shanae Show gets carried over

Clayton Echard and his group dates in Toronto’s Distillery District on Monday’s episode
of “The Bachelor.” PHOTO CREDIT: All photos except screen grabs John Medland/ABC

Welcome to Toronto. I’m really sorry we weren’t able to get rid of Shanae for you.

Yes, Monday’s “The Bachelor” crossed the border into Canada and featured, among other things, a comedy roast presided over by Russell Peters, but the joke was on viewers.

We were punked, essentially. Last week’s promo promised a two-on-one date between Shanae and Genevieve, and surely this would mean the end of one of the franchise’s most unlikable villains.

But nope. The two-on-one had barely got started when the dreaded “To be continued” popped onto our screens. The Shanae Show will be back next week.

And will Clayton finally smarten the hell up and send her home?

I mean, what is the point of a two-on-one if not to get rid of the villain? Still, the way Clayton conducted himself earlier in the episode didn’t exactly inspire confidence.

It began with the women lamenting Shanae’s behaviour of the night before, when she crashed the group date after-party, cussed out Sierra and Genevieve for talking about her, and threw the women’s football trophy into some bushes (the women said it was a pond, but I didn’t hear a splash). And just writing all that down emphasizes how bonkers ridiculous this manufactured drama is.

Clayton claimed he was going to address the Shanae situation before the rose ceremony and har, har, we’ve heard that one before.

First, though, he had a one-on-one date with Serene, who seems like a nice, normal person.

Clayton Echard with Serene Russell, who went on two dates with Clayton in this episode.

They had the run of the Galveston Island Historic Pleasure Pier so yes, we were still in America at this point. They went on rides, ate ice cream, kissed a lot, pretty standard stuff.

Clayton said he and Serene had a strong physical connection. “It’s just a matter of can we go deeper?”

Well, she could. Him? Not so much.

I mean Serene shared a story over dinner of losing her grandmother, who was a surrogate mother to her, and a cousin who was like the sister she never had within a couple of years of each other. It was obvious the loss still felt fresh. Clayton thanked her for sharing not once but three times.

And then he rewarded her for being “vulnerable” by giving her the date rose and lots of kisses, naturally.

“I definitely feel like I am falling in love with Clayton,” Serene said. Oh, honey!

It was time for the rose ceremony that we didn’t get to last week, but first Shanae. Clayton took aside the winning team from the tackle football group date to get their perspective on Shanae crashing their party. They recounted her vindictive, trophy-tossing behaviour. Alas, Susie unwittingly provided Clayton with an out by saying “I think she has to just apologize.”

So when Clayton took Shanae aside to address her behaviour, looking suitably solemn — “Throwing the trophy in the pond was not the right thing to do,” he said. Ya think? — he suggested she do just that.

Shanae lunged for the lifeline like Clayton latching onto a pair of lips.

“I want to apologize,” she said, feigning contriteness. “I was heated in the moment and, after going home and actually thinking about it, I should have never done that. That’s not my character, that’s not me.”

Shanae apologizes for trophy-gate, complete with crocodile tears.

She even managed to shed tears when she tried it out on the other women. “I am really sorry and I hope we can get past this,” she told them.

Sierra touched Shanae’s back sympathetically. Susie and Marlena both verbally accepted the apology. Clayton must have been so thrilled. No need to get rid of one of his favourite face-sucking partners. As soon as Shanae told him how “great” the apology had gone, he puckered up.

Too bad he didn’t realize when she said great, she meant her acting.

“That’s the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do in my entire life, apologize to people that I wasn’t sorry for. I’m not sorry hoes!” Shanae crowed. “I need an Oscar award for that performance . . . This is Meryl Streep and this is Shanae Ankney right here,” she said, holding a hand high above her head.

Something to keep in mind when the inevitable tearful — and just as fake — apology comes at “The Women Tell All.”

Some of the contestants were still hoping Shanae wouldn’t make it through the rose ceremony. Of course, she did. Jill, Lyndsey and Sierra got dumped and since Sierra had been one of the women who ratted out Shanae’s toxic behaviour, Shanae got to boast about how she “sent another bitch home.” At least Sierra warned Clayton, “Don’t be stupid, OK?” on the way out, for whatever that was worth.

It was off to Toronto, Canada, and thank you, Clayton, for calling it a beautiful and breathtaking city, even if that was part of the script.

The contestants took in sights like the Toronto sign in Nathan Phillips Square, Osgoode Hall and the Berczy Park Dog Fountain before checking into the penthouse of Hotel X, where Gabby learned she was getting the one-on-one date.

Apparently Gabby hadn’t been on Clayton’s radar until he saw her hilarious side. And yes, it was kind of funny that she thought Clayton might be feeding her an actual beaver tail when they stopped to sample the fried dough on the waterfront.

They also took a helicopter ride with a view of the CN Tower (for some reason, I thought they did the EdgeWalk, but I was wrong), played street hockey and hung out in the Toronto Music Garden. When Gabby encountered an adorable dog she got right down on the ground to pet it, which made me like her even more.

One of the cute pooches you’re likely to see in any Toronto park.

Gabby said she felt like she was “in a movie like ‘The Notebook'” and that she was falling for Clayton “in a very deep manner,” but she had something to tell him that might scare him away.

What was this deep dark secret? That she had been insecure in past relationships and had felt undeserving of love due to growing up with a mother who withheld her affection. In fact, she no longer had a relationship with her mother but said tearfully she hoped to in the future. “Right now I have a lot of healing to do.”

Clayton said — wait for it — thank you for sharing, also that it meant a lot that she’d opened up to him and he felt he understood her much better now. He handed over the date rose and they did some smooching in the Hotel X rooftop pool.

Then it was group date time for Rachel, Sarah, Serene, Marlena, Susie, Hunter, Eliza, Teddi and Mara, and they headed to the Distillery District — if you ever come to Toronto, make sure you check it out — to meet up with Clayton, host Jesse Palmer and comedian Russell Peters, both of whom are Toronto natives.

Russell Peters with “failed contestant” Jesse Palmer and “his stunt double” Clayton.

Peters was there to help the women roast Clayton and each other and he gave them a sample. “Clayton, he’s from Missouri. This guy is vanilla as fuck.”

Tell us something we don’t already know.

The women were game to take Russell’s advice to be mean.

“Clayton, you’re from Eureka, Missouri, right? Do you kiss your mother with your mouth open or closed?” asked Marlena. She also outed Hunter’s irritable bowel syndrome and compared Shanae to a herpes outbreak.

Mara, the oldest remaining contestant at 32, and Sarah, the youngest at 23, sniped at each other, although Mara veered from roast to straight insult when she ended with, “Just go home you desperate bitch.”

The members of the public who were in the audience, and who would have zero insight into all the drama, must have wondered what the hell they were listening to, especially all the jokes about Shanae, whom Hunter compared to “Jeffrey Dahmer calling himself a victim at his own crime.”

Clayton found it all hilarious. He told Marlena at the after-party she had a future in standup comedy. She was hoping her performance and the fact she told Clayton she’d be “all gas, no brakes” in their relationship would be enough to score the date rose.

But Clayton was feeling feels with Rachel — “she’s almost on my mind at most times of the day” — and it went to her. That was a blow to Susie, who had borrowed a microphone to do an unroast of Clayton, sharing the things she liked about him, two of which were his smiles and his dimples when he smiles.

As hard as it’s been to figure out who’s breaking away from the pack given Clayton’s indiscriminate displays of affection, Rachel is definitely a frontrunner.

In the meantime, Genevieve and Shanae had received the two-on-one date card and there was dread in the air — no, not theirs, ours! There were just 17 minutes left in the episode, so obviously the date would carry over into next week. And you just know the producers will milk that date drama for every drop of Shanae badness.

All we saw was Genevieve and Shanae taking a tense limo ride, meeting Clayton in Queen Victoria Park alongside Niagara Falls and boarding a Niagara City Cruises boat. And just in case we had any trouble figuring out which one was the villain, Shanae was in a black raincoat and Genevieve in white.

Genevieve had the humility to say in her confessional that she was nervous while Shanae boasted about her confidence, comparing Genevieve to a chihuahua and miming throwing her overboard. “This is the last time I’m taking the trash out,” she said.

Back at the hotel, the other women discussed the fact that if Clayton kept Shanae it would affect how they felt about him and it’s hard to believe that Clayton hadn’t already cottoned on to that potential consequence in his eagerness to keep Shanae around. Either the dude is seriously obtuse or he’s a producers’ dream, willing to do whatever they suggest to keep the drama going.

So once again, because I’m Canadian, I apologize. There is more Shanae nastiness ahead. Would it be too much to hope that Clayton not only gets rid of her but that they deposit her on Goat Island for a while?

You can watch Monday at 8 p.m. on Citytv. And you can comment here, visit my Facebook page or follow me on Twitter @realityeo

Watchable Feb. 7 to 13, 2022

SHOW OF THE WEEK: Hidden Assets (Feb. 13, 9 p.m., Super Channel Fuse and Super Channel on Demand)

Belgian actor Wouter Hendrickx and Irish actor Angeline Ball in “Hidden Assets.”
PHOTO CREDIT: Guillaume Van Leather/Saffron Moon/RTE/AcornTV)

A presumed terrorist bombs a fashion show in Antwerp, Belgium. A drug dealer’s home is raided in Shannon, Ireland, revealing ties to the bombing. And it’s up to Belgian and Irish detectives working together to untangle those connections and try to stop a second attack.

Throw Canada into the mix. Although the action — at least in the two episodes I saw — doesn’t stray from Europe, the drama is a Belgian-Irish-Canadian co-production, with Quebec company Facet4 Media on board alongside Belgium’s Potemkino and Ireland’s Saffron Moon.

The main cast is also either Irish or Belgian. Angeline Ball (who will forever be Imelda in “The Commitments” to me, although she’s done plenty of other TV and film) is detective Emer Berry, who leads the Irish Criminal Assets Bureau. Wouter Hendrickx is Christian De Jong, a Belgian counter-terrorism detective. They forge a working relationship that is neither adversarial nor buddy cop, and their time onscreen is all about the work, as opposed to other series that focus on the troubled home lives of their workaholic leads.

In fact, the series as a whole moves with the kind of brisk, no-nonsense approach that Emer and Christian seem to bring to their jobs. It’s not flashy or histrionic, nor does it get lost in the weeds of its plot: you can follow the threads without strenuous mental gymnastics, but that doesn’t make it boring.

Also part of the mix is Irish expat Bibi Melnick (Irish actor Simone Kirby), who lives in Antwerp with her Canadian husband James (British-Canadian actor Charlie Carrick) and runs a prosperous ship chandler company. She gets dragged into the investigation by the fact two of her employees, both immigrants, are linked to the bombing, and by her estranged brother Fionn (Irish actor Peter Coonan), who has ties to the Irish drug dealer.

Canadian actor Michael Ironside, who has a list of credits longer than my arm, also co-stars as Bibi’s father-in-law, hedge fund mogul Richard Melnick.

Through Bibi and her workers, the show touches on issues of refugee migration, Islamophobia and right-wing political populism. But overall, it seems to be a crime drama that is mainly about the crime and the solving of it.

I have one quibble with a scene in which Berry runs out of the police station to shoot at two gunmen on a motorcycle who have just ruthlessly and efficiently executed a witness. But she and De Jong are likeable leads who seem quite capable of connecting all the dots.

Short Takes

Actor CCH Pounder at a memorial to the enslaved people who led a revolt in Louisiana in 1811.
PHOTO CREDIT: Smithsonian Channel

One Thousand Years of Slavery — The Untold Story (Feb. 7, Smithsonian Channel)

This four-part docuseries comes from the production company of actors Angela Bassett and Courtney B. Vance (who also narrates) and takes a view of slavery beyond its history in America and the horror stories that we’re used to, sharing the accounts of enslaved people who fought back. The first episode, for instance, covers the history of the 1811 German Coast revolt in Louisiana; the 1831 Jamaican plantation rebellion that led to the abolition of slavery in the British Empire; the 1839 uprising aboard the slave ship Amistad and the survivors of the Clotilda, the last ship to bring African captives to America — illegally — in 1860. The episode’s final story — of Clotilda survivor Matilda McCrear and her three great-granddaughters — demonstrates that the legacy of slavery, despite its odiousness, can be a positive one. At the age of 73, in 1931, Matilda walked 17 miles to the Dallas County Courthouse to claim compensation for being stolen from West Africa. Her claim was denied but, in 1965, her descendants took part in the civil rights marches that led to the passage of the Voting Rights Act. These stories are told with the help of Black actors and other celebrities, including CCH Pounder, Debbie Allen, Lorraine Toussaint, Dule Hill and Bernice King, daughter of Martin Luther King Jr.

David Oyelowo and Gugu Mbatha-Raw in “The Girl Before.”
PHOTO CREDIT: Amanda Searle/The Girl Before

The Girl Before (Feb. 10, 10 p.m., Crave)

The first hurdle you have to get past in this thriller series based on the JP Delany novel is that anyone would agree to move into a house with such a long list of restrictions, no matter what the rent, particularly a house so unforgivingly austere. Yes, London is undoubtedly a frightfully expensive place to live, but no pictures allowed? No knick-knacks? No books?!? As a lover of things, the single tiny closet struck terror into my heart, never mind the fact that the occupants’ safety might be at risk. But Emma (Jessica Plummer) and Jane (Gugu Mbatha-Raw), both women looking for a clean slate after suffering traumas, do agree to move in — three years apart — and both get romantically involved with Edward Monkford (David Oyelowo), the ridiculously controlling architect who set all those conditions. The mystery revolves around a death in the house. Was it an accident or was it murder? If the latter, who was the killer? The answer, when it comes, isn’t that difficult to guess. As actors, Mbatha-Raw and Plummer acquit themselves respectably, digging into Jane’s and Emma’s pain as well as their strengths, which brings warmth to this otherwise chilly tale. Treat it like the tastefully accoutred whodunit that it is and all will be well.

Crave also has the documentary “Triumph: Rock & Roll Machine” (Feb. 7), about one of Canada’s better known rock bands; the “docu-comedy” “Pillow Talk” (Feb. 10), which explores relationships between four real-life couples and one pair of roommates, playing fictionalized versions of themselves, with all the interactions happening in the bedroom; the Steven Soderbergh movie “KIMI” (Feb. 10); spinoff series “Power Book IV: Force” (Feb. 6, 9 p.m.); and Season 2 of “Dollface” (Feb. 11).

Judge Emma Waddell admires a mini Manhattan townhouse in “Best in Miniature.”
PHOTO CREDIT: CBC Gem

Best in Miniature (Feb. 11, CBC Gem)

Speaking of things, one wonders what Edward Monkford would make of the doll-sized objects in “Best in Miniature.” Tiny pieces of furniture and decor, even working fireplaces and chandeliers, may not have much practical purpose, but they’re certainly fun to look at and to watch being created. This competition series starts with 11 miniaturists, Canadians and Americans with one Brit thrown in, who are vying for $10,000 and a residency at the school of the International Guild of Miniature Artisans in Maine. The contestants’ only limits are imagination and skill — and the ticking clock — as they craft their mini dream homes, which include a five-storey townhouse, an Atlanta mansion, a haunted house, an A-frame cottage, a medieval lair for sibling witches, even a shipping container home. The detail of some of their minuscule creations is truly amazing, particularly when it comes to furnishing their homes. Judges Emma Waddell and Micheal Lambie pick a winner each week and send one competitor home. Aba Amuquandoh is the host. The series comes from Toronto’s marblemedia, the company behind the popular “Blown Away.”

CBC Gem also has “The Head” (Feb. 7), a mystery about a massacre at an Antarctic research station.

Odds and Ends

Julia Garner as con artist Anna Delvey, a.k.a. Anna Sorokin, in “Inventing Anna.”
PHOTO CREDIT: David Giesbrecht/Netflix

I have watched two episodes of the Shonda Rhimes-created series “Inventing Anna” (Feb. 11, Netflix) and I have thoughts, which I would love to share with you, except reviews are — sigh — embargoed. It’s based on the true story of Russian Anna Sorokin, who conned thousands upon thousands of dollars out of banks, hotels and New York’s elite by pretending to be a German heiress named Anna Delvey. The Netflix series uses a fictionalized reporter played by Anna Chlumsky to frame the tale. It’s a fascinating story and if you’d like to hear the real details from people who were involved, I recommend the podcast “Fake Heiress.” Netflix also has Season 2 of “Love is Blind” (Feb. 11), the spinoff “Love Is Blind Japan” (Feb. 8) and Season 4 of the animated sitcom “Disenchantment” (Feb. 9).

Disney Plus has the Korean drama “Snowdrop” (Feb. 9) about a forbidden romance between a couple of university students (Jung Hae-In and Jisoo of K-pop band Blackpink) in 1980s Seoul.

British streaming services have a couple of female-led detective dramas on tap. First up is Season 4 of “Agatha Raisin” (Feb. 7, Acorn), starring Ashley Jensen (“After Life”) as the stylish amateur sleuth. BritBox introduces a new crime enthusiast in “Sister Boniface Mysteries” (Feb. 8), with Lorna Watson as a Vespa-driving Catholic nun solving mysteries in the 1960s English countryside.

Prime Video’s offerings include another rom-com, “I Want You Back” (Feb. 11), in which Charlie Day and Jenny Slate play 30-somethings who are trying to win back their former partners with each other’s help, except we can all guess they’ll end up together, right? Prime Video also has “LOL: Last One Laughing Brazil” (Feb. 11).

From OUTtv comes the LGBTQ dating series “Dating Unlocked” (Feb. 11). The daters here represent a range of gender and sexual identities. And they’re not all looking for love in the traditional sense — some just want hookups, some are polyamorous — but the desire for human connection is something they can all get behind. Non-binary “intimacy nerd” Yaz is the charismatic host.

NOTE: The listings here are in Eastern Standard Time and I’ve verified the times where possible, but it’s always best to check listings for your own area. The selection of programs reviewed reflects what I’m given access to by networks and streamers, whether reviews are embargoed, how many shows I have time to watch and my own personal taste. The Odds and Ends section includes shows that I have not watched.

Shanae is tackled but not ousted as the Bachelor drama continues

Mara tackles Jill on the group date, a good approximation for how viewers feel after another punishing episode of “The Bachelor.” PHOTO CREDIT: All photos but screen grabs Felicia Graham/ABC

Houston, we have a problem.

Not only did Bachelor Clayton Echard not send Shanae Ankney home at Monday’s rose ceremony, which was expected, he continued to be oblivious to the BS she was laying down throughout the episode.

After the contestants moved on to Houston, Texas, two more women came forward to tell Clayton that Shanae couldn’t be trusted. And what did he do? Fell for more of Shanae’s nonsense — hook, line and sinker.

Judging by the way Clayton hoisted Shanae up onto a bar so he could apply suction to her mouth, with hand planted on her booty, we could be dealing with a simple case of thinking-with-his-dick-itis.

But that doesn’t negate the fact that Bachelor Nation feels like it’s taken a few of Teddi’s football tackles after a third week of pointless drama revolving around one insecure, vindictive contestant.

I don’t want to call Clayton names or insult his intelligence, but dude, what were you thinking?

It’s one thing to have the mean girl stuff happen where you can’t see it, which was the defence Clayton mounted on a recent episode of the “Bachelor Happy Hour” podcast, but Shanae’s nastiness was on display during a sit-down between her and Elizabeth and Clayton and, not only did Clayton not see it, he turtled.

Decided he didn’t want to deal with the conflict, walked away, cancelled the cocktail party, and then gave a rose to Shanae and sent Elizabeth home, to the horror of the other 14 women who remained.

Clayton’s discomfort is written all over his face as Shanae and Elizabeth debate.

I mean seriously: it seemed like a good idea to give a rose to somebody who spent several minutes whining that she was being bullied because nobody wanted the stupid plate of shrimp she brought out to the hot tub?

As Elizabeth sensibly pointed out, “Why was that my responsibility?”

It wasn’t, it isn’t, regardless of whether she was in the hot tub that day or not. And for the record, Elizabeth was in the hot tub, not upstairs having a shower as she told Clayton, but it doesn’t bloody matter! It’s a tempest in a teapot, or in a shrimp pan, if you will.

As Jill said, “I lost brain cells because I listened to Shrimpgate” and Jill is all of us.

That Shanae walked back into the mansion carrying a plate of — you guessed it — shrimp was the producers messing with us. Let’s move on.

So Elizabeth and Kira and Melina got sent home, and we were forced to watch Shanae gloat about how she won and nobody should fuck with her, and the next day everybody flew to Houston. And then we had a pointless interlude where a man named Clarence, one of Clayton’s football friends, came to visit Clayton in his hotel suite just to further drill into our heads that Clayton wants a family.

Because Clarence has a wife and a child, he is a shining exemplar of Bachelor #goals. Pssst, did you know Clayton wants kids, y’all?

Mind you, we knew we were in trouble because Clayton told Clarence that he expected to be hung up on two, “maybe three, possibly four women” at the end of this. Which I guess explains all the promos about him telling three women he’s in love with them.

Will Rachel be one of those three? It seemed like a possibility after their one-on-one date.

Rachel and Clayton only have eyes for each other on their one-on-one date.

They went horseback riding; they dropped in on some poor family and ate their barbecue; they whispered — literally whispered — sweet nothings to each other on a picturesque dock.

At dinner, there was a minor fakeout when Clayton said he was confused and had questions for Rachel, but what he wanted to know was how “a woman as beautiful as you with this badass job” ended up on “The Bachelor.”

The badass job was the short answer. Rachel, who’s a flight instructor and a pilot, described being in a relationship with a man who didn’t support her career. She told Clayton she wants to get married and have kids, but she also wants to keep flying.

He assured her he would “never, ever hold you back from doing something that you love.”

After that they got serenaded by — what else? — a country band called Restless Road, and Clayton gave Rachel the rose and they kissed a lot, and he told her, “I’ll never dim your light.”

That’s kind of sweet. It’s the kind of thing that might give me the warm fuzzies if it wasn’t for the fact I can’t get excited about seeing someone as lovely as Rachel end up with a man who got bamboozled by Shanae.

Come to think of it, can I steal the name of that band to describe this season?

Time for the group date, but first Sierra, Genevieve and Gabby had a conversation in the hotel suite in which Sierra suggested the group date contestants warn Clayton about Shanae’s character, or lack thereof, in an effort to get her sent home. Of course, Shanae, who was napping in her room — a mark of a true villain as Corinne Olympios can attest — overheard them and I have questions.

Did they not realize that Shanae was within earshot? Why didn’t they whisper? It’s just so convenient.

And then, fancy that, the group date was a tackle football game, because the franchise is an equal opportunity provider of chances for contestants to get violent.

Sarah, Eliza, Teddi, Marlena, Jill, Susie, Mara, Sierra, Hunter, Lyndsey, Genevieve, Gabby and Shanae were split into two teams, coached by Houston Texans Jonathan Greenard and Kamu Grugier-Hill.

It was the Purple Punishers vs Shrimp Stampede in the Bachelor Bowl.

Shanae was on the — wait for it — Shrimp Stampede team, but the Purple Punishers had Olympian Marlena to run touchdowns and also an ace tackler in Teddi, so they beat the shrimps 21-0. And that meant they won extra time with Clayton at the after party.

(As an aside, the “Bachelor Bowl” commentary from host Jesse Palmer and sports anchor Hannah Storm made me miss the late Fred Willard, who used to team up with Chris Harrison, but I will give Jesse credit for one good line about Jill, “an architectural historian, also a vegan, Hannah, and she just ate grass.”)

At the after-party, Sierra put Operation Sink Shanae into effect. Both she and Genevieve told Clayton that Shanae wasn’t to be trusted. “We believe that if you have the full story you wouldn’t want somebody like that to be your wife,” Sierra told him, while Genevieve said, “She just can’t get along and she’s lied and she can’t apologize for what she’s done.”

Clayton was frustrated that the Shanae drama hadn’t been squelched and “Shanae seems to be involved in all the conflict.”

I believe the correct expression would be “Where there’s smoke, there’s fire.” But Clayton was more interested in the sparks generated when he and Shanae put their lips together.

He halfheartedly confronted Shanae when she crashed the after party — because of course she did — but she didn’t even have to lie this time to wriggle off the hook, telling him how she’d overheard Gabby, Genevieve and Sierra plotting against her.

After Clayton’s and Shanae’s smooch sesh, she walked over to where the other women were sitting, said, “Genevieve and Sierra, keep my name out of your fucking mouths,” picked up the Bachelor Bowl trophy, threw it in some bushes and stormed off.

“It’s Shanae Show, not The Bachelor,” smirked Shanae. And she’s absolutely right, it is, and it’s ruining what was already shaping up to be a lacklustre season. How much longer will we have to put up with her is the question.

There was no “to be continued,” but the promo for next week showed a two-on-one date with Shanae and Genevieve. Confusingly, the promo for later in the season also showed both Shanae and Genevieve. Surely, Clayton won’t go on a two-on-one and keep both the women.

We’ll find out next week. It airs Monday at 8 p.m. on Citytv. And you can comment here, visit my Facebook page or follow me on Twitter @realityeo

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