Tag: Bachelor in Paradise Canada (Page 1 of 2)

Bachelor in Paradise Canada brings sparkling end to season

July 10, 2023 / Debra Yeo

The final players of “Bachelor in Paradise Canada” Season 2: Chelsea, Austin, Lisa, Connor, Joey, Tessa, Matia, Celine, Garrett, Meagan, Juan Pablo and Ana. PHOTO CREDIT: All photos Citytv

SPOILER ALERT: If you haven’t seen the “Bachelor in Paradise Canada” Season 2 finale there are spoilers ahead.

If Sunday’s “Bachelor in Paradise Canada” is the last episode we ever get at least it went out with a bang and by bang I mean an engagement.

Season 2 improved on the performance of the 2021 edition, which produced just one couple (who are no longer together). On Sunday, there were three: Austin Tinsley and Chelsea Vaughn (duh), Joey Kirchner and Tessa Tookes, and Garrett Aida and Meagan Morris.

And who got the brass ring, er, the engagement ring? Why, the Alberta cowboy and the Brooklyn singer. Despite having been an item for only a couple of weeks of Paradise time (six episodes for those of us at home), Joey and Tessa became affianced.

And not just that, they made “Bachelor” franchise history, according to Citytv, when Tessa became the first woman on any show to propose. More on that later.

First let’s rewind to the beginning of the episode.

They mysterious lady in red who interrupted Matia’s goodbye last week was — double duh — Celine. (And in the interest of pinpoint accuracy, she was wearing red shorts and a bikini top, not a dress or romper, as I said last week.)

Following Matia’s realization that a pair of comely breasts (hello Krissy) did not trump an emotional connection, Celine came back to get her man and, in a roller-coaster of an episode, this was one of the high points as Matia and Celine hugged, kissed and cried. (Not gonna lie, I cried too.) I’m a little fuzzy on the timing since we last saw Celine on FaceTime from the Edmonton airport on her way to Calgary, but apparently she made it home for one night and then flew back the next morning.

And anyway, who cares? As Austin said, “I’ve never seen a more beautiful moment here in Paradise than that moment right here.”

Hold that heartwarming thought.

Clearly, Paradise was coming to an end and the new cast spigot had been turned off, so Sam, having been dumped by Cole, and newbie Marilyn, who had one inconsequential date with Connor, wisely decided to leave.

They weren’t quite Humphrey Bogart and Claude Rains in the airport scene in “Casablanca,” but Sam said she and Marilyn had “kickstarted a beautiful friendship” and they left the beach with their arms around each other.

They left behind six couples, including Connor and Lisa, and Juan Pablo and Ana.

Noah Erb and Abigail Heringer came to Ontario to show everyone there is love after Paradise.

Cue an American Paradise couple come to give everyone a pep talk: Noah Erb and Abigail Heringer. If you’re a franchise watcher you’ll recall that they met in Season 7 of “Bachelor in Paradise,” broke up before the season ended then got back together again after.

“You guys are in positions where you don’t have to make it that hard,” Noah told the Canadian-American couples. “You guys still have the opportunity to, if you really are feeling that with somebody, go all the way, make sure they know it, or if you’re really not, make sure they know it.”

Alas, Lisa decided to take the latter part of that advice.

As the couples walked a red carpet as part of a casino night group date, Lisa said in her in-the-moment that she needed to get some things off her chest. “I so badly just want to have a happy ending with Connor. There’s just stuff I need to say about how I feel. I just can’t stay silent.”

As if that wasn’t foreshadowing enough, at a game that involved the contestants placing bets on each other, Lisa was singled out as the person most likely to get cold feet.

The question, I suppose, was how warm had Lisa’s feet been to begin with?

Not very was the impression left during a chat between Connor and his friend Noah. After Noah concluded that Lisa hadn’t fully invested in Connor, Connor started having “a slight panic attack” in his ITM, getting lightheaded and having trouble breathing.

Unfortunately, this was not a production fakeout; Connor was about to get his heart broken.

Connor Brennan and Lisa Mancini at casino night before things fell completely apart.

Connor and Lisa went to have a chat. When Connor asked Lisa if she wanted to see him outside of Paradise, she sighed and said, “Ah, Connor,” adding, “I don’t think this is good for either of us.”

Connor interpreted her response as her turtling to protect herself emotionally. Lisa said in her ITM that Connor checked a lot of boxes, but “something’s missing there.”

Whatever the case, they went their separate ways. “I’m leaving sad again,” said Connor, who previously struck out on both “The Bachelorette” and “Bachelor in Paradise” U.S. And honestly, that makes me a little sad.

Somebody else appeared to be struggling during the casino night. That would be Joey, especially after the other contestants voted him and Tessa most likely to leave engaged.

One never knows how much of what’s said in ITMs is what players really feel and how much is torqued to serve a plot line, but Joey seemed genuinely uneasy as the end of Paradise drew near. Although he is an actor so . . .

Joey said it was terrifying, despite the fact that he loved Tessa, since his relationship with Vay in the first season had come to such a bitter end and “there’s shit left over from that.”

Tessa reassured Joey that she was all in, but his uneasiness carried over into the fantasy suite.

Because yes, it was fantasy suite time. And, as host Sharleen Joynt made clear, that was no place for couples who weren’t falling in love or already there. So that ruled out Ana Cruz and Juan Pablo Osorio, and Matia and Celine.

Matia Marcantuoni and Celine Paquette left Paradise together, but who knows what happened then?

Despite their heartfelt reunion, Celine noted, “We’re not in love with each other yet. We’re not boyfriend and girlfriend.”

So they left Paradise arm in arm hoping for the best. I have no idea if they got it. Too bad we didn’t get a reunion show to figure this stuff out.

As for Ana and Juan, Ana wanted to go to the fantasy suite, but it was clearly game over as soon as Juan told her, “You genuinely are an amazing person” — without even making eye contact. “To go into the fantasy suite and explore this with you, I’m not ready,” he added.

They left, definitely not together.

Austin and Chelsea seemed the most solid as they ventured into the fantasy suite. Chelsea sent Austin on a scavenger hunt of Paradise places where they had key moments, including her Episode 1 “nip slip,” their first kiss, the first place she said she was falling for him, etc., culminating in the prize of her and a bottle of champagne, and a toast to “leaving here together.”

Garrett and Meagan also made it to the fantasy suite, with Garrett telling Meagan, “We’re genuinely, like, on the road to falling in love.” I’m not sure if, like the road to hell, that one is paved with good intentions, but it worked well enough for Meagan.

And then there were Joey and Tessa. Joey was still expressing doubts, specifically in his own emotions, but they went to the fantasy suite nonetheless. “We at least owe it to ourselves to see what it would be like to be with each other and then from there we can decide what we’re gonna do,” he said.

The theme of Joey being afraid he was going to break Tessa’s heart continued into the ITMs, even as they sat on the bed together. The next morning, Tessa told Joey that when they discussed what they’d do outside of Paradise, “I didn’t expect one of those options to be leaving here without me.”

But Joey said Tessa had “talked me off the ledge.”

Whether there really was a ledge, or just an effort to build some suspense going into proposal day, only they and the producers know for sure. But it’s not a stretch to think you’d be scared out of your gourd at the thought of potentially proposing to someone you’d known for two weeks.

As for Austin and Chelsea, he said waking up next to her was “bliss” and “I can’t wait for whatever tomorrow brings and the rest of the years.”

Garrett said he and Meagan had “cracked the code.”

Garrett Aida and Meagan Morris exchange final roses and “I love you’s” on the beach.

They were first up on the final rose deck. And apparently that road to love of which Garrett spoke was more like an autobahn, because he told Meagan, “I love you” and she said it back, both of them shedding happy tears, and they exchanged final roses and walked off hand in hand.

Next!

Chelsea told Austin that “falling for someone this quickly in an environment like this is something that scares the shit out of me, but I’m gonna try to take a page out of your book and lean into that instead of running away from it, and I can confidently say that I love you Austin.”

Austin Tinsley and Chelsea Vaughn left Paradise with full hearts.

“I love you too,” Austin said. And that was a feeling “I’m gonna run towards every day of my life.”

No, there was no ring, but it was a sweet conclusion for Paradise’s longest standing couple.

Finally, we came to Joey and Tessa. The former had put his cowboy hat and boots back on for the big occasion, which was fitting since Tessa called him her “disco cowboy.”

There were feels right from the get-go as a clearly emotional Joey told Tessa, “You’ve only known me for a very short period of time and you already made me a better person, and I can’t thank you enough for that. And I love you.”

After saying the L-word back, Tessa told Joey that “through the ups, the downs last night, us just trying to figure it out, I’ve just got nothing but confidence that you and I can take on the world.”

And then she posed a question: “Joey Blake Kirchner, will you be my Joey for the rest of my life?” A choked up Joey said “Yeah” and she slipped a woven orange and yellow and brown ring on his finger.

No, what? I’m not crying.

Joey Kirchner pops a version of the question to Tessa Tookes on the Paradise Canada finale.

“As hard as you can try you’ll never be able to one up me,” said Joey, pulling a ring box out of his back pocket and getting on one knee. “Tessa Tookes, you want to go to the disco with me?”

“Let’s go baby, ” Tessa replied.

It was lovely and totally on brand. You wouldn’t expect Joey to say anything as conventional as “Will you marry me?” would you?

How can you not be grinning ear to ear after a finisher like that?

The episode ended with the three happy couples hanging out and cheers-ing to “finding love in Paradise.”

So even though we didn’t get a reunion, I do have a little intel on what happened after the fact. The good news is that Joey and Tessa, and Austin and Chelsea are still together, the former in Toronto, the latter in New York. If you hop over to thestar.com/television you can read my interview with the four of them.

Garrett and Meagan did not last, unfortunately, and I have no further info about that.

All in all, it was a good season. Since Citytv has put the show on hiatus for at least 2024 there’s no telling if it will ever come back. If this is all we get at least we went out on a high.

Good luck to Joey and Tessa, and Austin and Chelsea.

At some point I hope to start recapping “The Bachelorette” if my crazy schedule allows, but it won’t be till late July at the earliest.

Everyone have a good summer in the meantime.

You can comment here, visit my Facebook page or follow me on Twitter @realityeo

Bachelor in Paradise Canada: couples implode on the beach

July 3, 2023 / Debra Yeo

Yes, two new women hit the beach: Marilyn Smith and Krissy Kennedy. Neither will be here for a long time, *as the theme song says*, perhaps not even a good time. PHOTO CREDIT: All photos Citytv

Is it still summer where you are? I think winter is coming on “Bachelor in Paradise Canada.”

There was a melancholy, elegiac feel to Sunday’s episode, the second last of the season — maybe even the show as a whole?

Couples were breaking up, people were leaving. Part of the impetus for Paradise falling apart, to use Lisa’s words, was the arrival of two new women: fan contestants Marilyn Smith and Krissy Kennedy, 20-somethings from Toronto and Vancouver respectively.

It is laughable, of course, to believe that anyone arriving at this stage of the game stands a chance in hell of finding “love,” let alone any kind of viable connection. The point is to stir shit up, because god forbid we have an episode where we just watch people who are into each other making out and hanging with their friends.

So Marilyn and Krissy arrived with date cards in hand and a bit of attitude — Krissy: “I am a part-time student and a full-time bad bitch.” OK, yawn — and quickly asked Connor and Matia to go on dates with them.

There were two narratives at play here: one, that despite Lisa finally being all in on Connor, he would ditch her for Marilyn; two, that Matia would lean fully into his f-boy reputation and dump Celine for Krissy, despite having just spent the night in the boom boom room with the former.

The first was ridiculous. Look, I’m not going to pretend I know what was going through Connor’s mind. Yes, Marilyn seemed like a nice enough woman and I imagine going jet-skiing together would be fun, which is the underwhelming adjective that Connor kept using to describe Marilyn. But the whole “I want to get to know her a little bit more” plot line reeked of producer manipulation.

Connor Brennan gets to know Marilyn Smith after their “fun” jet-ski date.

Maybe Connor did kiss Marilyn (repeatedly according to her) because he was subconsciously trying to push Lisa away and avoid getting hurt, but Marilyn never seemed like a genuine threat to his relationship with Lisa.

That impression was sealed during a conversation between Connor and Marilyn that was singularly lacking in chemistry and depth. In between the awkward pauses, Marilyn told Connor she had come to the beach hoping to find love, but she had never had a relationship, apparently because no one she had dated had met her high bar.

Connor said that was a red flag. Ya think?

So Connor went back to Lisa, telling her of Marilyn, “That ain’t it.” Tell us something we didn’t already know.

We can, however, perhaps finally bury once and for all the bad rap against Connor’s kissing skills laid on him by Bachelorette Katie Thurston. “Connor is a good kisser,” Marilyn said. And yes, it’s been said before, including by an audience plant at a “Men Tell All,” but a Canadian wouldn’t lie about it, would they?

As for Matia and Krissy, it seemed initially that all the progress made raising Matia in our estimation through his relationship with Celine was about to come undone.

Not to put too fine a point on it, the dude seemed to be thinking with his little Matia.

The buxom Krissy was Matia’s type physically, “probably the best looking girl I’ve seen here,” and he told Krissy he’d formed “no real connection” in Paradise, which surely would have come as news to Celine the day after they slept together.

Matia reasoned in his in-the-moment interview that despite his “great connection” with Celine, “I do feel it’s something just in Paradise because I feel like I know as soon as I’m out in the real world that’s gonna be super challenging to keep that going.”

So Matia proceeded to form a deep, tongue-first connection with Krissy’s lips.

Matia Marcantuoni’s jet-ski ride with Krissy Kennedy wasn’t so smooth. I guess the smooching was.

Personally, I think Matia should have interpreted his overturning the jet ski and dumping himself and Krissy into the cold lake as an omen, but instead he confessed to Celine that he had kissed Krissy and would “like to take another day just to see if there’s actually something there and if there was then I just wouldn’t waste your time.”

Whether that was Matia’s genuine wish or what production wanted him to say, talk about a slap in the face to Celine!

“I feel like I’ve just been put through so much here and it’s just like I’m at my wit’s end,” said Celine. “I just don’t know how much more I can give to anybody here. I don’t want to wake up tomorrow again and just do this all over. I don’t have it in me anymore.”

That should have been the point where Matia tried to convince Celine to stay but, instead, when she asked him if he had anything else to say, he replied, “No, there’s nothing I want to say right now.”

So Celine left and Matia was free to suck more face with Krissy. And look, I know these episodes are edited like crazy and people might be playing roles as opposed to being themselves, but Krissy’s gloating after Celine left rubbed me the wrong way.

She couldn’t even get Celine’s name right in her ITMs, calling her Seeley and Shanae, and really Matia, this is your pick?

Anyway, Celine’s departure played a role in the brewing drama between Sam and Cole.

It started earlier with Sam urging Cole to go talk to Krissy, even though that wasn’t what she really wanted.

Cole ITMed that Sam was feeling pressure “to be the girl she thinks I want or something” and “at this point with Sam everything we do just feels like an act,” whereas Sam lamented, “Why can’t he just be obsessed with me?”

Still, things seemed normal as Cole comforted a crying Sam after Celine’s departure. And then Sam let slip an “I love you,” which stopped Cole cold as he leaned in for a kiss. But Sam quickly course-corrected that she “never meant that” and they finished the kiss. In his ITM, however, Cole said Sam’s outburst “seemed almost manipulative to me and that should speak to the toxicity of the situation.”

Yikes.

Cole Medders and Sam Picco on an earlier episode in the proverbial happier times.

When Sam once again tried to minimize the “dumb” thing she said to Cole, the conversation turned to her reaction to Cole flirting with other people and Cole being annoyed with her saying things she didn’t mean. And it got heated.

“You don’t get to tell me, though, that you’re OK with something and then actually in reality behind the scenes you’re not OK with it. That’s not fair,” Cole said, his voice rising.

“I’ve given you the freedom to, at every turn, without any complaints, to kiss whoever you want, do whatever you want to do. At every turn you’ve kissed whoever you want, Jake, Joey, body shots, whatever, I have never complained or said a thing about it . . . but every time I look or talk or touch another human being you freak the fuck out. How is that fair?”

Sam protested that she had never been upset, but Cole countered that she had and she had punished him. And Sam stopped trying to argue and Cole walked away.

It seems obvious that Cole was cool with Sam being with other guys because he’s just not that into her, which has been apparent almost from the beginning of their coupling up, whereas Sam has been very much into Cole. So when Cole said it was a one-way street, he was right, though perhaps not in the way he meant: Sam seemed to really care about him; he seemed to just be killing time.

Cole said in his ITM, “I’m not proud of myself for the way I raised my voice or voiced those feelings, but they’ve been there for a while, they’ve been bubbling below the surface and I felt really trapped by her for a while now. I’m just, I’m done.”

And he was, although he waited until the next day to leave, first apologizing to Sam for not giving her “everything that you wanted or needed.” He had the cheek to ask for one last kiss before walking off the beach, though. Sam gave it to him, of course.

It’s not that things were all doom and breakups at the Christie’s Mill Inn and Spa.

Garrett and Meagan, for instance, went on a yoga date and apparently something about Meagan teaching Garrett yoga helped them understand each other better? I don’t know.

Tessa Tookes and Joey Kirchner have become one of the more solid couples on the beach.

Tessa and Joey became the first couple to lob a fully formed L-bomb — or a mutual one, anyway, leaving aside Sam’s dud. They exchanged “I love you’s” and Joey said in his ITM he never had anyone understand him “to the depths that Tessa does.” Even Austin and Chelsea, the dad and mom of the beach, haven’t gotten past the “falling in” stage yet. Go figure.

And Connor and Lisa had a special “date” in which she shared her love of painting with him and he shared his love of music via portable keyboard and sang a song, the chorus of which was “I believe it’s what you say, not the time you take to say it.”

Do I expect to be humming it in the days ahead? No, but it was kind of sweet, and I have been a Connor and Lisa shipper since the beginning.

But we’re not done with Matia yet. Turns out Celine left him a note, which Matia took to a deserted dock (well, except for the camera person) to read. It looked like it was in Celine’s actual handwriting, although the cynic in me is tempted to think this was all part of a grander production plan. You know, give Matia a heel turn by having him turn his back on Celine and then voila! A letter convinces him to do the right thing. Redemption all around.

Mind you, Matia seemed genuinely emotional after reading the note, which said in part, “Thank you for allowing me to get to know the true you. Thank you for all the laughs. You always made me feel special in every way you knew how.”

Is it any wonder that Matia decided he made a mistake throwing Celine over for Krissy? Like, duh.

He FaceTimed Celine, apparently while she was in Edmonton to catch a connecting flight to Calgary. There were tears on both sides as Matia told Celine he had underestimated their connection, he was sorry and he’d like to stay in touch outside Paradise.

“A lot of people say I’m very closed off, but I think at the end of the day it really just takes the right girl and I think Celine was that girl,” said Matia. Also, “I realize it’s not always about looks.”

Speaking of looks, Matia broke the news to Krissy that he was still into Celine and he was leaving, although Krissy chose to interpret his departure as having nothing to do with any feelings for Celine because, you know, having known Matia for about 24 hours she was clearly the expert.

“I think Matia is ending things because he doesn’t want to come off as like the fuck boy of the season,” she said. Then she added, “Matia doesn’t have much more going for him than his looks” and “Matia is more boring than a sack of hammers. Goodbye. Get me out of here.”

With pleasure, Krissy. Buh bye.

And then, just as Matia took his leave of all his Paradise pals, saying, “I gotta go get Celine,” a brunette walked over to the group in a red dress or romper, and people squealed. Lisa called it “the biggest shock of Paradise” in her ITM. Given that Matia started to wipe his eyes after seeing the mystery woman, I’d bet you dollars to doughnuts that it was Celine coming back to the beach.

We’ll find out in next week’s finale, which also features a casino night; a visit from American “Bachelor in Paradise” couple Abigail Heringer and Noah Erb; a suggestion that all might not be well between Connor and Lisa; Garrett staring at an engagement ring; tears for Joey and Tessa; and a nervous Austin.

You can watch next Sunday at 8 p.m. on Citytv. And you can comment here, visit my Facebook page or follow me on Twitter @realityeo

Bachelor in Paradise Canada: ‘stupid drama’ Knee-Gate puts Maria and Josh on their heels

June 26, 2023 / Debra Yeo

Host Sharleen Joynt, guest judge Priyanka and bartender Kevin Wendt reflect how I feel about Knee-Gate during the first “Bachelor in Paradise Canada” roast. PHOTO CREDIT: All photos Citytv

Here we are folks, the eighth episode of “Bachelor in Paradise Canada” and since everybody has stopped kissing everybody else with wild abandon (except for Ana, more on her later) our best bet for drama is . . . more Knee-Gate? Really?

Yes, Maria and Tessa were still sniping at each other over the fact Maria touched Joey’s knee on last week’s episode.

To quote Austin on the subject, “I don’t know, dawg.”

How convenient that the first ever “Paradise Roast” happened the day after Tessa and Maria had their set-to. As the cast split into pairs (and one trio) to write their jokes, Tessa and Celine decided to go after their “common enemy,” Maria.

Why was she Celine’s enemy? Um, because Maria supposedly got upset seeing Celine and Matia together, and because she kissed Joey even though she told Celine she wasn’t going to do that in Paradise. First off, thank goodness that happened before Tessa arrived. Secondly, I suspect kissing Joey had a lot to do with guidance from the producers.

Whatever the case, several people made jokes at Maria’s expense, including Sam and Ana, Matia and, of course, Celine and Tessa, who said they’d “both been personally victimized by this season’s most emotional nemesis, Maria.”

I’m sorry, personally victimized? What?

When it was Maria’s turn she told Tessa she was going to make a joke about Joey “and I just wanted to let you know so you don’t think I’m flirting with him.”

Maria’s “joke” for Joey was: “If you’re not allowed to keep your friends in this bubble, what are you gonna do outside of it?”

No, it was not funny and it wasn’t actually a joke, but it raised something I’ve wondered myself: will jealousy get the better of Tessa if she’s in a long-distance relationship with Joey outside Paradise?

A question for another day (and, obviously, one that’s already been answered in the real world since this was all filmed a while ago).

Chelsea Vaughn brought the house down pretending to be Garrett Aida at the Paradise Roast.

Luckily, Connor and Chelsea took the stage with some jibes that were less mean-spirited and actually funny. Chelsea brought her fellow contestants to their feet with her impression of Garrett in a bathrobe and sunglasses.

Not surprisingly, the judges — bartender Kevin Wendt, host Sharleen Joynt and drag queen Priyanka — voted Chelsea the roast MVP and she won . . . yeah, a “romantic date.” You didn’t think she was going to win cash or something, did you?

Honestly, it’s fine because, now that we’ve gotten past the fake plot line about Chelsea being interested in Josh and Austin in Tessa, Chelsea and Austin are officially the best couple on the beach.

Since this whole exercise is supposedly about people finding love it was good to see them get some alone time to drink Champagne and eat chocolate-covered strawberries and dance to a live performance by Lindsay Ell (yeah, we’re back to the country music, sigh). And Austin asked Chelsea to be his girlfriend, which was adorable.

Austin Tinsley and Chelsea Vaughn, probably the only couple who stand a chance outside Paradise.

They also told each other the next day they were falling in love with each other, so yay them.

You know who else professed to be falling in love? Joey and Tessa. By Tessa’s own admission they had only been together “a couple of days,” which makes the whole Knee-Gate thing seem even more ridiculous.

And sure, people can fall in love in days, but colour me skeptical about the long-term prospects for this one, although who knows?

Meanwhile, Joey had a talk with Maria about Knee-Gate and he totally got why she had touched his knee. “You and I have always had such a flirtatious relationship in our friendship that it’s something you would do without even thinking about doing it, which I totally understand.”

He assured Maria that nothing would get in the way of their friendship, and it would be up to him and Tessa to discuss boundaries in his physical contact with other women. Then Joey and Maria shared a hug.

His assessment of the whole mess? The “stupid drama” should have been “left in last night,” he said in his in-the-moment interview.

So it’s probably a good thing he didn’t see what happened between Maria, Tessa and Celine later.

When Tessa said that she didn’t get Maria’s “joke” about Joey, Maria explained that seeing as Joey was an attractive male model and bartender who interacted with lots of women, “if you have issues with someone who’s been a friend of his for seven years” — I see we’ve added a year to the friendship — “touching his knee you’re gonna have a lot of issues.”

Celine jumped in, saying that if Maria was friends with Joey, seeing how close he had gotten to Tessa “would have been an opportunity for you to just give them their space and respect that.”

Tessa and Celine tag-teamed again, telling Maria she had a problem with constructive criticism. Maria, Tessa, said didn’t seem to understand the issue.

Well, the issue from where I sit is that a woman who’s known a guy for years touched his knee and the woman he’s been dating for what — two days, three? — got mad about it and wanted to keep banging on about it, although I realize we’re only seeing the edited versions of these conversations.

Should Maria have put on rags and paraded through Paradise while people threw things at her and yelled “Shame!” like she was Cersei bloody Lannister in “Game of Thrones”? I mean seriously. This whole argument was probably inflamed by producer interference, but it seemed to get out of hand.

Maria left the conversation, saying in her ITM she felt bullied. And Lisa, who seemed to be Maria’s only ally, told Josh to go find Maria and comfort her.

That led to a conversation the next day in which Josh suggested he and Maria both leave Paradise to explore their connection in the outside world. Maria seemed skeptical that would actually happen, though, and given that Josh was living in Vancouver and she was in Toronto I can see her point.

Maria Garcia-Sanchez, seen with host Sharleen Joynt, decided to leave Paradise.

When the rose ceremony came, Maria announced that she had been feeling alienated and uncomfortable and sad, and it was time for her to go.

Josh left too and Joey seemed just as skeptical as Maria that he’d make a go of their relationship, saying, “All right, man, see you next year, Season 3.”

(While we’re on the subject: since Citytv has announced that “Bachelor in Paradise Canada” is taking a hiatus next year, colour me doubtful we’ll ever get a Season 3.)

The only other drama at the rose ceremony involved whether Ana would give her rose to Juan Pablo Osorio or Edward Naranjo. She did seem genuinely torn. She had sexual chemistry with Juan but questioned if an emotional connection would follow, whereas Edward was the comfortable but less passionate choice.

I guessed last week she’d go with the safe option, but I clearly underestimated the appeal of a dancing vagina because Ana chose Juan.

Also, there were a couple of red herrings in last week’s promo to be cleared up. It looked like Meagan was going to get her heart broken, but she and Garrett were still a thing by episode’s end, albeit not quite speaking the same language.

And while Connor did indeed tell Lisa, “If it’s not a hell yes it’s a hell no,” he and Lisa appeared to be in a good place. Apparently humour is her love language, because she seemed to be more into Connor after seeing him perform at the roast.

At the very least, she agreed she would want to date him after Paradise.

“I’m not trying to fucking marry you right now,” Connor clarified.

So will these two crazy kids make a go of it in the real world? Who knows?

In the short term, with two new women hitting the beach next week, it seems someone else will turn Connor’s head. And the new arrivals cause another rift between Cole and Sam, with Cole sniping, “Every time I look or talk or touch another human being you freak the fuck out.” And it seems Celine is also left in the lurch with Matia departing the beach, which must be a real bummer if they went to the boom boom room as they planned.

You can watch next Sunday at at 8 p.m. on Citytv. And you can comment here, visit my Facebook page or follow me on Twitter @realityeo

NOTE: I have edited this because I became privy to some new information about Knee-Gate. I’m not going to tell you what or from who, but it seemed fitting to make some adjustments.

Bachelor in Paradise Canada: ‘too many pickles’ on the beach

June 20, 2023 / Debra Yeo

It was not so happy trails for for a number of players on Monday’s “Bachelor in Paradise Canada.”
PHOTO CREDIT: All photos Citytv

Here’s the thing about pickles: they can taste pretty sour. And on Monday’s “Bachelor in Paradise Canada,” several relationship “pickles” were souring the summer camp vibe on the beach.

The central one involved “Big Brother Canada” alum Sam Picco and ex-“Survivor” contestant Cole Medders. They have been a thing since the first episode, although there’s always been a sense that Sam was more emotionally involved than Cole, especially since Cole kept pursuing Lisa Mancini on the side.

And on Monday, Cole got pretty pissy when Sam tried to bring up the subject of love.

“What if I said I was falling in love with you?” she asked. “Have you ever loved somebody?” she persisted when Cole didn’t answer.

“I don’t really like these conversations. I don’t want to explore that stuff,” was Cole’s response.

Dating show contestants like to talk about people putting walls up — Cole was practically putting up a Hoover Dam.

Cole told Sam bluntly, “I am not falling in love,” and OK, fine. I’m guessing they had known each other about two weeks by the time this episode was shot. And there was a context for Cole’s skittishness. In his in-the-moment interview he explained that he had opened up on TV before and got screwed over — presumably talking about his relationship with Jessica Johnston on “Survivor” — “so I am not doing that again.”

But all the same, he was kind of a dick in the way he talked to Sam about it. In his ITM, he said he couldn’t keep leading Sam on, making her think they might have a post-Paradise future, and that they might not even be compatible.

If you think that meant Cole was now free to explore his supposed passion for Lisa, think again.

Cole Medders had no time for Lisa Mancini on Monday’s “Bachelor in Paradise Canada.”

Lisa and Cole had been avoiding each other ever since Cole and Sam went to the boom boom room, so Lisa tried to clear the air after Cole pointedly ignored her at the bar.

Cole coldly said in his ITM that part of him wanted to talk to Lisa and be friends, but the other part was “I just don’t care at this point.” So when Lisa approached him, Cole sullenly lied that everything was OK between them and then dismissed her while he continued brooding alone on a bean-bag bed.

Neither Lisa nor Sam was happy the next day. The roomies had compared notes the night before and seemed to be in agreement that Cole was manipulating and bamboozling both of them. Hold that thought.

Lisa was also feeling uncomfortable about her relationship with Connor Brennan. Bottom line: “I don’t know how I feel about Connor.” Yes, she liked him and liked spending time with him, but something was missing, she said more than once.

She was in a . . . wait for it . . . pickle.

Joey, who has essentially become this season’s narrator, said that although Connor and Lisa looked cute together — I totally agree — “girls usually don’t want the cute guy.” Sad face emoji.

OK, back to Sam and Cole.

While Cole was off moping, Sam told Joey and Tessa that she and Cole were done, a point she emphasized in several teary ITMs in which she said she didn’t have anything more to give to Cole. Until she did, that is.

Cole Medders and Sam Picco kissed and made up. Surprise, surprise.

A date card mysteriously appeared for Sam and, duh, she took Cole. All that was required was an hour of horseback riding at Glen Oro Farm in Hawkestone, Ont., an apology from Cole and some kissing, and suddenly all was right with Sam and Cole again, or as right as it could be.

Just as suddenly, Lisa was the villain. Lisa, Sam said, was a “bad person” who wanted to hurt her and Cole was just being genuine. And sorry, but I call bullshit, whether Sam actually believed that or was being told to say it by the producers.

We all watched the footage of Cole sucking face ad nauseam with Lisa. I draw your attention to Episode 5 in which Cole told Lisa, “I really fucking see something here, something that could, like, work in the real world too.” Which sounds an awful lot like “you guys could have a future outside of here,” which is what Sam said she had been told Cole said to Lisa.

Also, it doesn’t sound at all like “As she kept pushing I was, like, ‘Well, we can always talk outside of this later,'” which is what Cole told Sam he said to Lisa.

Look, I get it: a dude might tell a white lie when he’s put on the spot. From the way Cole’s leg jiggled as Sam told him what Lisa had told her, he seemed a little nervous about it.

And yes, I try not to take any of this too seriously: I don’t know any of these people or who they are in the real world, but never once have I had the impression that Lisa is a mean girl who would deliberately try to hurt Sam or anyone else.

So yeah, sorry Sam, I’m still Team Lisa.

Moving on to the night’s other big pickle or double pickles, as it were.

Juan Pablo Osorio, a Colombian-born fitness coach from Toronto, joined the cast. And if you didn’t know he would take Ana Cruz on his date, a Paradise returnee with Colombian heritage, you haven’t been paying attention.

Sure, Ana had been coupled up with American “Bachelorette” alum Edward Naranjo, but she was attracted to Juan’s “perfect smile” and his tattoos.

As Edward said, it was Mexico, his heritage, vs. Colombia.

Juan Pablo Osorio and Ana Cruz on their date, before they got up close and smoochy.

At least Ana hugged Edward goodbye before she and Juan went go-karting, which is more than Austin got when Chelsea went off with Josh last week.

But whereas that date was a production stunt, Ana seemed to be genuinely into Juan, or at least into kissing him. As she put it, “when I kiss Juan my vagina is dancing.”

She still liked Edward, however, even if his kisses didn’t make her lady parts salsa.

“I’m in a pickle. I have two pickles,” she lamented in her ITM. “Do I go for the pickle that’s brand new? Do I risk it or do I go for the pickle that I’ve already established a connection with? There’s too many pickles in Paradise.”

Amen sister!

Ana was still dancing the next day, presumably both her va-jay-jay and the rest of her body: in a salsa dance-off, she shook it with both Juan and Edward and then she had a smooching session with Juan. And, of course, Edward was sitting where he could see them. I can practically hear the producer guiding him to the right chair.

I suspect she will choose the more familiar pickle in the next rose ceremony, whenever that is, but who knows?

And finally we close with the silliest dispute of the episode. What is it with women who couple up with Joey and jealousy?

During a game of “Truth or Dare,” Tessa noticed that Maria kept touching Joey’s right leg. Tessa said “caressing.” To me, it looked more like resting her hand on it repeatedly.

Tessa Tookes had a message for the other women: hands off Joey Kirchner.

Sure, I get it; if another woman was touching my husband’s leg I’d probably be staring daggers at her too. But then Tessa kept going on and on to Meagan and other people about how Maria was crossing boundaries and not showing respect and only cared about herself to the point that the leg-touching molehill became a mountain.

Joey was very understanding of Tessa’s annoyance and agreed he would keep Maria’s handsyness in check.

And Maria was also conciliatory when Tessa confronted her, saying that’s how she had always been with Joey in the six years they had known each other, but she was happy that Tessa and Joey were together.

“I honestly had no idea I was doing it,” Maria said. “I totally, like, respect your relationship and I would never want to get in between.” But also, Maria said, she is a touchy person and it was hard to turn that off.

Things just disintegrated from there with Maria and Tessa talking over each other and Maria finally walking away in anger, and heading straight over to Connor and Lisa to complain.

Sorry Tessa, but I’m with Lisa here: the leg touch is “a non-issue.” And I would love to put leg-gate behind us for good. But it looks like Tessa and Maria are going to take swipes at each other next week in a “Paradise roast” presided over by drag artist Priyanka.

Also, Connor tells Lisa, “if it’s not a hell yes, it’s a hell no.” Celine puts Matia on the spot, Josh puts Maria on the spot, Meagan appears to be heartbroken and we might even get a rose ceremony.

You can watch next week, but note that “Paradise” is shifting for the rest of the season to Sundays at 8 p.m. on Citytv. And you can comment here, visit my Facebook page or follow me on Twitter @realityeo

Bachelor in Paradise Canada: a bum steer for Austin and Chelsea

June 13, 2023 / Debra Yeo

The cast of “Bachelor in Paradise Canada” raises a toast. ALL PHOTOS CITYTV

How do you create interest in a “reality” TV dating show when you’re six episodes in and your core cast is stable, aside from playing some silly kissing games?

You make it look like your most solid couple is in danger of breaking up.

That was the main “plot” in Monday’s episode of “Bachelor in Paradise Canada.”

You’ll recall that last week Vancouver filmmaker Josh Guvi walked back onto the beach. My impression from seeing him in the first season of “Paradise” is that he’s a stand-up dude, which made it suspicious that he would choose Brooklyn model Chelsea to take on his date despite being told by Lisa that she was off limits because of her relationship with Austin.

A more natural choice would have been Maria since she and Josh had been in communication since meeting the previous season and still seemed to be interested in each other.

Josh Guvi and Maria Garcia-Sanchez get reacquainted in Paradise.

Now, can I prove that Chelsea approached Josh for a chat and that Josh then asked her out — right in front of Austin — at the behest of producers? Of course not, but you can draw your own conclusions.

Chelsea said she and Josh had “a lot in common” and that he was everything she was looking for on paper without enumerating what those things were.

Maybe they got into an in-depth conversation about that stuff while they were massaging each other’s asses during their “butt facials” (I googled it, these are actually a thing), but probably not.

The main purpose of the activity was obviously to annoy Austin when Josh and Chelsea returned from the date and told everyone at the bar about their mutual butt fondling.

Mind you, Austin didn’t spend all his time fretting while they were gone. You’ll recall that he had described Tessa as his “type” when she joined the cast last week so, on the theory that he had to test his connection with Chelsea, Austin approached Tessa for a talk and a smooch.

It was less shakeup than fake-out, however, since it didn’t sway Austin’s focus from Chelsea or Tessa’s from Joey.

Joey Kirchner and Tessa Tookes were still into each other on “Bachelor in Paradise.”

As Tessa put it, “I feel actually not super weirded out by the fact that he just kissed Maria and I just kissed Austin. I know in my heart Joey’s connection with me is much stronger and more meaningful and something he wants to pursue.”

Sure, which makes the fact that Joey went to Maria to hash out once and for all whether they were more than friends seem like just another production trick.

But back to Austin and Chelsea.

They didn’t kiss and make up, so to speak, right away. Austin was pissed after hearing that Chelsea smooched Josh. As he put it, “Like what the fuck? I’m coming in with 12 days of me being vulnerable and being the best version of myself that I could be towards you and he just needs a butt facial to do that shit?”

This seems like an accurate summary to me, but Chelsea took issue with Austin’s language and said he was giving “controlling vibes.” She also claimed she wanted more time to talk to Josh and might kiss him again.

Austin seemed genuinely hurt, so perhaps he was not in the loop on the scheme, or just taken aback the fake connection went a little farther than expected.

It was Chelsea’s turn to get annoyed when Austin said he had made out with Tessa multiple times (I think he was exaggerating there), so Chelsea twisted the knife, saying about Josh, “His tongue was in my mouth, if you want clarification.”

Listen, I didn’t need to know that, never mind Austin.

Austin Tinsley and Chelsea Vaughn, still Canadian Paradise’s No. 1 couple.

Both Austin and Chelsea dutifully said in their in-the-moment interviews that they were questioning whether their relationship was salvageable. Chelsea was still (claiming to be?) pissed at Austin the next day for being insecure and petty, and Austin apologized for making her feel rough and not giving her space.

And then — what do you know? — after Josh belatedly realized that he’d been massaging Chelsea’s bum the day after it had been in the boom boom room with Austin, he told her he didn’t want to mess things up between the two of them. Also, he had kissed Maria and found “the passion” he was looking for.

And conveniently, Chelsea suddenly realized that she didn’t want to lose Austin. It only took an hour of screen time for her to get to that place, about an hour longer than everyone watching.

At the cocktail party, Austin and Chelsea were back to kissing and snuggling and laughing. Austin even let the L-word slip in a roundabout way when he said, “I know Joey (is) falling in love too.”

So faux crisis averted: Austin and Chelsea are still Paradise’s No. 1 couple.

Josh’s part in the disruption narrative wasn’t done though.

Even though his rose was clearly bound for Maria, he claimed to be torn after Nithisha laid some very deep kisses on him. As Paige said, they were “sucking face.”

Nithisha gave it her best shot, but the fix was in for Maria.

You know who didn’t kiss for once? Cole and Lisa. They decided they were going to give their bonds with Sam and Connor a chance, and step away from each other.

Now, if you’ve been watching these last six weeks, you’ll have noticed that Sam seems to be more into Cole than he into her, and ditto with Connor and Lisa, or at least it’s been edited that way.

But Cole and Sam decided to take their connection to the next level by visiting the boom boom room. And according to Joey, whose room was nearby, there was “some boom boom for sure.”

Lisa Mancini, centre right, with Paige Allen, has given up on Cole Medders for now.

That didn’t sit well with Lisa, who wouldn’t even speak to Cole the next night when they were both sitting at the bar, and said his actions had pushed her closer to Connor.

There was one genuine surprise among all the predictable couplings: Matia and Celine. The former had disengaged from Maria after not feeling a spark; the latter had been dumped by Joey, and she and Matia had been hanging out as friends ever since.

But they started kissing and then laughing about it, and I have to say it was pretty sweet. It was also fun hearing the gasps at the rose ceremony when Matia gave Celine a kiss after handing over his rose. Who’d have thunk they’d become one of the more adorable couples in Paradise?

As for the rest of the roses, they went as expected: Joey’s to Tessa; Garrett’s to Meagan; Edward’s to Ana; Cole’s to Sam; Austin’s to Chelsea; Connor’s to Lisa and, yes, Josh’s to Maria.

That left Nithisha and Paige as the odd women out. Nithisha exited expressing confidence she would find her person. “Party Paige,” who earlier thanked her cast mates for making Paradise “one of the best fucking times of my life,” left drinking champagne.

Next week, various cast members find themselves in “pickles,” including Ana and Lisa, who says she doesn’t know how she feels about Connor. Tessa and Maria are beefing over Joey. New arrival Juan Pablo hits the beach (no, not that Juan Pablo). And Cole tells Sam he’s not falling in love.

You can watch next Monday at 8 p.m. on Citytv. And you can comment here, visit my Facebook page or follow me on Twitter @realityeo

Bachelor in Paradise Canada: ‘wild Joey’ runs free on the beach

June 6, 2023 / Debra Yeo

Joey Kirchner went on Date No. 3 with Tessa Tookes. ALL PHOTOS CITYTV

There was a “dumpster fire” on the beach, a shit show, a storm brewing, it was “orgy island” and wild horses were running loose on Monday’s “Bachelor in Paradise Canada.” Choose your metaphor.

Basically, it was another episode full of wayward lips although the show at least made it past first base, so to speak, when Austin and Chelsea went to the boom boom room, more on that later.

This was Episode 5 and I don’t think I’ve seen a group of people less likely to commit on a “Bachelor” show. And we can’t blame age, since the youngest cast members have already come and gone. Some of these folks are pushing or past 30.

Exhibit A was Joey, who decided to bust up his pairing with Celine by kissing both Paige and Sam. In the case of Sam, he did it where Celine could see them; heck, where everybody could see them: right at the bar.

When Cole, Sam’s No. 1, showed up, it turned into a smooching quartet, with Sam bizarrely demanding that Cole kiss Lisa while Sam continued swapping spit with Joey — hence bartender Kevin Wendt’s “orgy island” comment.

The so-called weirdness might have ended there except that Joey and Sam kept kissing — Joey described them as “two wild horses” — and Celine wouldn’t let it pass.

As much as everyone’s all “you have to kiss everybody in Paradise” this season, Celine was genuinely hurt, not least because she considered Sam a friend.

At first, Sam appeared utterly remorseless, telling Celine she did it because it felt right and “my core relationship feels so fluid that I just feel like I can do whatever the fuck I want.” Sam, who usually has plenty to say about Lisa trying to “steal” her man, didn’t apologize until the next day.

Celine Paquette and Joey Kirchner before Joey went rogue.

At least Joey — who admitted in his in-the-moment interview that he was being a “shitty, fucking dude” — finally told Celine outright that it wasn’t going to happen for them.

You know who else it wasn’t happening for? Maria and Matia, not that we didn’t know that almost from the get-go.

Since the men now had the roses and the power, Matia felt comfortable confessing that he didn’t feel a true connection with Maria, who complained somewhat comically to Lisa and Sam, “Stupid hockey player, like I literally only date doctors.”

None of those on the beach that I can see.

But the women of Paradise weren’t done with Matia. Paige took a run at him.

She had rejected Joey despite his kissing abilities because she didn’t want to bust up him and Celine, and she had no time for Connor since he lacked “big dick energy” — yeah, I played it back a couple of times and I’m pretty sure that’s what she said.

But Matia? “Love the tats, love the bod.”

Matia wasn’t loving Paige, however, and since he didn’t have to grovel for a rose told her so right away. Whereas Maria’s answer to Matia’s rejection was tears and self-blame, Paige’s was to go on the attack.

“Don’t have your wall so fucking high. You’re a heartbreaker,” Paige protested. When Matia countered that he doesn’t lead girls on (well, unless he needs a rose), Paige called him jaded. Also, “I’m calling you on your bullshit and you don’t like to hear it.”

And then she ranted in her ITM: “Get him the fuck out of the show, get him the fuck out of here. Like why is he here?”

“Good luck, Matia!” she screeched as Matia walked away, and Austin and Chelsea doubled over in laughter.

Pssst, Paige, pretty sure he’s not the one going home.

Also seemingly on the chopping block was Nithisha.

Garrett Aida seemed to finally choose Meagan Morris over Nithisha Ketheeswaran.

It looked like Garrett, her only romantic interest, was in her rearview, given all the canoodling he was doing with Meagan. And Sam tried to seal the deal by pulling Garrett aside to tell him that Nithisha was being “strategic.” There’s that word again.

The thing is: “Bachelor in Paradise” is essentially a game, especially the way it’s being played this season. The rules say you have to be coupled up or you go home, so are you trying to tell me that nobody else on the entire beach is thinking about strategy when they cosy up to somebody to get a rose?

That’s absurd.

Also absurd was Garrett declaring, “I need to know for myself what the truth is because I demand loyalty.” Like the loyalty he showed when he was two-timing Nithisha with Meagan, you mean?

This whole Nithisha plot seems like something manufactured by production to ensure there’s a villain arc.

And I don’t want to get too woke here, but it’s not exactly a good look that a group of mostly white woman are talking crap about the sole remaining South Asian cast member.

Nithisha is no shrinking violet, however, and defended herself to both the other women and Garrett, which then got spun around in Garrett’s ITM to Nithisha being manipulative. Make of that what you will.

And on the subject of romantic triangles, could Cole please choose between Sam and Lisa already?

On the one hand he told Lisa he could picture being with her in the “real world.” But then he told Sam she was “still my person” and he needed to break things off with Lisa. Except in his ITM he said he might not be telling Sam the truth. And THIS IS EXHAUSTING! JUST PICK!

Even if he does choose Sam though, that guarantees nothing.

Chelsea Vaughn and Austin Tinsley: together today, maybe not tomorrow.

Just look at Austin and Chelsea, who’ve been a seemingly committed couple almost since day one. They became the first to visit the boom boom room. (No, we didn’t see it, this isn’t Playa Escondida in Mexico.)

What great timing then for Austin to decide he was interested in new arrival Tessa Tookes. You put out for your “Paradise” boyfriend and he wants to take a helicopter ride with another woman.

Austin had to stay grounded, however, since Tessa, a Week 2 cast-off from Clayton Echard’s “Bachelor” season, chose Joey to accompany her in the whirlybird.

This was Joey’s third date so he is now officially the Bachelor of Paradise.

Joey, Tessa said, “just has this je ne sais quoi and he’s just really hot.”

For his part, Joey kept describing Tessa, a musician living in Brooklyn, as “cool.” He claimed she was the only woman he had genuinely felt anything for in Paradise.

Make of that what you will since, if the promo is to be believed, Tessa will be making out with Austin next week. (Also, a mea culpa here. I forgot a cardinal rule of promos, which is that they are meant to be misleading, so last week I said incorrectly that Austin would go on the helicopter date with Tessa.)

Josh Guvi is back. Does this mean a reprieve for Maria Garcia-Sanchez?

There was one more new arrival before episode’s end, although we have to wait till next week to see who he takes on his date: Josh Guvi, a Vancouver filmmaker and returning “Bachelor In Paradise Canada” cast member who apparently is Chelsea’s type.

He’s also Maria’s and, after feeling some sparks with her last season, kept in touch with her after the show. But does the fact we see Maria teary-eyed in the promo (again) and apparently kissing Joey (again) mean she’s SOL when it comes to Josh?

And will Sam and Cole really make it to the boom boom room and will that mean the end of his flirtation with Lisa?

You can find out next Monday at 8 p.m. on Citytv. And you can comment here, visit my Facebook page or follow me on Twitter @realityeo

Bachelor in Paradise Canada: Babes on the beach, dogs too

May 30, 2023 / Debra Yeo

There was a second rose ceremony on “Bachelor in Paradise Canada.” Three men went home, one of them voluntarily. PHOTO CREDIT: All photos Citytv

Welcome to the Lisa-naissance.

Striking a blow for quirky girls everywhere who like to talk to squirrels, Lisa Mancini was continuing to burn up the beach on Monday’s “Bachelor in Paradise Canada.”

In the words of her friend Joey Kirchner, another Canadian cutie who’s looking to play the field, “She’s coming through just putting that tongue wherever she wants to blow it. It’s fantastic.”

In Lisa’s own words, “The Lisa Renaissance is in full effect.” Also, “the makeout bandit strikes again.”

Be mad about it if you want. Somebody on the Canadian production staff got the “more drama” memo.

Lisa was kissing all the boys and only one of them was crying in his red wine.

Well, OK, she only kissed two boys Monday: American “Paradise” alum Connor Brennan and newbie Jake Ondrus.

Jake Ondrus, centre, with Austin, Sam, Chelsea and Joey, turned Lisa’s head.

As an aside, whatever the women are seeing in Jake is not translating all that well through the TV screen. He does seem like a pretty chill guy, mind you. Lisa said he was spiritual. They talked about the “magic of the universe.” What do I know? I’m just a cynical TV critic.

Lisa said Jake was “a serious candidate,” although she was also still interested in Connor.

She definitely wasn’t feeling Quartney, who was blaming Lisa for the fact he hadn’t made connections with any other women. Here’s a question: if you keep banging your head against the same wall, is it the wall’s fault?

Also, you think any of the other women wanted to connect with Quartney after seeing how intense he got with Lisa after one date? And not a “date” date, a Paradise date.

Quartney tried, though, and got shut down by Nithisha and Meagan, which prompted him to throw his plastic wine glass and stomp off — well, inasmuch as one can stomp on sand — saying, “I’m done with y’all.”

Kevin Wendt, bartender and good egg, talked Quartney down, telling him to take a breath before doing anything crazy.

Also, his departure would obviously play better if he waited to make a speech at the rose ceremony. That’s not Kevin saying that; that’s me.

Edward Naranjo makes his pitch for Nithisha Ketheeswaran’s rose.

The next evening, with a rose ceremony looming, the focus shifted to Nithisha. Seeing as how Garrett was getting closer to Meagan — they had a private dancing and smooching party, y’all — Nithisha was taking applications for a friendship rose. The candidates included her former kissing partner, Edward; new guy Godfrey and an increasingly desperate Quartney.

Ding, ding, ding. Nithisha is the winner of the villain edit. I’m not sure what the difference is between Lisa not being sure who to give her rose to and Nithisha not being sure who to give her rose to. But Nithisha gave hers to Edward after supposedly telling other people he wasn’t there for the right reasons, so that made her decision “strategic.” I guess that’s a bad thing?

Like, wouldn’t you want to be strategic playing a game like “Bachelor in Paradise”?

The rose ceremony did happen — I guess we’re getting one every two episodes now. And Quartney got his close-up, telling host Sharleen Joynt and his fellow contestants that since he hadn’t found his person he was going to leave rather than potentially (read: almost certainly) not get a rose.

From there it went pretty much like clockwork, with Celine giving a rose to Joey; Chelsea to Austin; Meagan to Garrett; Sam to Cole; and Maria to Matia (oh honey, he is so not into you).

And then Lisa hemmed and hawed between Jake and Connor. She might have been confused. I wasn’t. Connor is third in the opening credits and they aren’t alphabetical. I believe he is what the folks on “Game of Roses” call a protected player.

Jake might have felt he was more exciting for Lisa than Connor; not so the producers.

Anyway, Nithisha gave the final rose to Edward, paving the way for the next day’s fallout.

Connor told Lisa that Jake was a “jackass” and “not a genuine person.”

First off, Connor was pissed that Lisa had been (allegedly) undecided about him and Jake. “At this point, I’m not all in on Lisa,” he said in his in-the-moment interview.

Also, Sam and Maria gave Nithisha a talking to. “You say one thing and then the next afternoon you change,” accused Maria. “We just feel like you wanted to play a strategic game and it wasn’t a heartfelt game,” added Sam.

Nithisha insisted she was there for love. Where she lost me, however, was when she called Godfrey “Godwin” and, after being corrected by Maria, retorted, “I’ll call him whatever I want to, OK.” Uh, OK, but that’s his name?

Anyway, a couple of new women had come to the resort: 31-year-old fan Paige Allen and “Paradise Canada” returnee Ana Cruz, 27.

Paige, who described herself as “a blond bombshell,” “party Paige,” but also “your worst nightmare,” got a little catty with a bikini-and-cowboy-boots-clad Sam, saying, “I was gonna wear my cowboy boots with my outfit, I thought it would look too much like a stripper.” Meow.

However she eventually fits in on the beach, Paige perfectly fit the narrative of tension between Lisa and Connor since Paige took Connor on her date. I would have definitely picked the guy who admired my skeleton tattoo, if I had one, over the guy who said his type was “fake asses, fake boobs.” Hello Matia.

If Connor had any designs on doing some retaliatory smooching with Paige, it must have gone by the wayside when they found out they were babysitting for Kevin and Astrid Wendt (formerly Loch). Kevin and Astrid went on the actual date, leaving their baby August and dogs Ace and Bean with Connor and Paige.

Kevin and Astrid Wendt trust August, Ace and Bean to Connor and Paige.

I’ll admit it was cute. Connor took out his ukulele and made up a song for the babe and the pooches.

Meanwhile, back at the beach, Lisa wasn’t exactly pining for Connor. She and Cole spent more alone time together, during which they established they were both very attracted to each other but were afraid of hurting Connor and Sam. So they didn’t kiss. They just nuzzled a lot. I guess rubbing someone’s butt and kissing their neck doesn’t count as making out.

When Connor came back from his date and told Lisa that he didn’t kiss Paige, Lisa decided not to tell Connor about her interlude with Cole, even though she was planning to spend more time with Cole that night.

The only other development was that Ana took Edward on a canoe date, on which they bonded over their shared Latino heritage, their interest in cooking and their closeness to their moms. Also kissing.

Nithisha is clearly going to have to get her next rose from someone else.

Next week: Cole and Lisa break their no-kissing rule; Paige makes a play for Matia; Austin goes on a helicopter date with new arrival Tessa; Joey smooches Sam; and Josh Guvi makes his return.

You can watch Monday at 8 p.m. on Citytv. And you can comment here, visit my Facebook page or follow me on Twitter @realityeo

Bachelor in Paradise Canada: Follow the bouncing lips

May 23, 2023 / Debra Yeo

Joey Kirchner and Celine Paquette are hell-bent for leather in the first
“Bachelor in Paradise Derby.” PHOTO CREDIT: All photos Citytv

I don’t blame you if, after watching Monday’s episode of “Bachelor in Paradise Canada,” you feel as if you were being bounced around on one of the inflatable horses in the Bachelor in Paradise Derby.

To quote the eminently quotable Joey as he prepared to bounce to victory: “Hold on tight, honey, we’re about to go.”

And go the cast did: bouncing back and forth between kissing partners.

Austin and Chelsea seem like the only safe bet on the beach so far, although I would have said that last season about Brendan and Illeana, so I reserve the right to be skeptical.

Let’s start with ex-“Survivor” contestant Cole Medders, one of the hottest commodities on the beach.

He gave Sam his rose last week despite being pursued by both Celine, who’s now with Joey, and Rianna, who’s now gone. So he and Sam are solid now, right? Right?

If by solid you mean they both kissed other people — more than once — this episode, then sure, like a rock.

It started with Cole smooching Lisa and not feeling particularly guilty about it. He ‘fessed up to Sam right away, who lied and said it didn’t bother her. But I’m thinking Sam calling Lisa “toxic” in her in-the-moment interview is a dead giveaway that she was pissed.

(And did I mention Sam and Lisa were roommates at the Christie’s Mill Inn and Spa in Port Severn, Ont.? So awkward?)

Lisa Mancini is “trying to live Paradise as it should be lived,” lips first.

Sam claimed it was about Lisa feeling threatened by Sam and wanting to make her feel like shit. Me, I don’t think it has anything to do with Sam.

“This is my year in Paradise, so I’m living it the way I want to live it, to the fullest,” Lisa said.

You know who didn’t pretend to be OK with Lisa kissing Cole? Quartney.

“I’m disgusted. I do not like a girl who’s making out with multiple dudes. This is not OK,” Quartney huffed in his ITM.

Dude, do you know what you signed up for? I know you were on “Bachelorette” and not “Bachelor in Paradise,” but tell me you’ve at least watched the show.

“You’re making me sound slutty,” Lisa complained to Quartney, who didn’t seem apologetic about that.

“Why can’t you just see something with me? Like, can we not just try this?” Quartney pleaded. “We keep getting distracted because of you.”

Pssst, Quartney, maybe it’s you and your possessiveness that are the issue.

As Connor, Lisa’s other sometime kissing partner, put it the next day, “You don’t own her . . . We’re in Paradise to explore connections with people and part of that is kissing people.”

Yes, and that’s something that Sam seemed to get . . . when it was her kissing someone else.

She perked up considerably when newcomer Jake Ondrus, a 22-year-old personal trainer and holistic nutritionist, asked her on a date. To be fair, she wasn’t the only one eyeballing him. Jake was practically giving “Bachelor” vibes as he sat on a couch surrounded by eager women.

Sam Picco and new arrival Jake Ondrus were digging each other’s energy.

Sam said they went “really deep really fast,” which apparently had something to do with Jake talking about “mind, body, soul connection” and Sam saying she was an “empath” and a “manifester.”

On their date, they manifested sexy time on a Harley Davidson, dressing up in leathers, including hot pants and a bikini top for Sam and, eventually, no shirt for Jake. And as they straddled the bike for a photo shoot, face to face, there was inevitably some kissing, quite a lot of it actually.

So was Sam really thinking about Cole “constantly” on her date, even when she kissed Jake “20 times”? Unknown.

Was Cole thinking about Sam when he kissed Lisa again?

Cole defended himself to Sam by pointing out that she was on a date — a kissing cousin of the infamous “We were on a break” defence from “Friends” perhaps?

He insisted he was excited to build on his relationship with Sam, but I can’t blame Sam for being uncertain where she stands with Cole.

A couple more couples were on the chopping block.

Raise your hand if you’re surprised that Meagan dumped Matia. No takers? I thought not.

Meagan wanted Matia to be “open” with her. Matia wanted her to be patient with his reluctance to be fully himself, which is presumably someone besides a “cabana douche babe.” Meagan was out of patience. She decided to hang with Garrett instead, who had allegedly soured on Nithisha for kissing Edward and not telling him.

Garrett Aida and Meagan Morris coupled up — for now anyway.

Garrett even got teary-eyed in front of Meagan talking about his parents’ divorce, so openness wasn’t an issue there. And it was Meagan with whom he partnered on a bouncy horse for the Paradise Derby.

Still, their newfound connection didn’t nullify Garrett’s desire to smooch Nithisha, but I guess that’s a triangle for another day.

Matia had to find a new place to park his lips and that turned out to be Maria.

The notoriously kissing-shy Maria found the “fire” she’d been missing with other people after smooching with Matia. Too bad for her Matia wasn’t feeling the connection back, but with a rose on the line he was willing to fake it.

Maria had already friend-zoned Connor earlier in the episode, giving Lisa her permission to pursue the American “Paradise” alum. I confess I’m shipping Lisa and Connor, but Lisa wasn’t exactly all in.

Sure, she kissed Connor and said she felt like “a schoolgirl with a crush,” but she chose Jake as her derby partner.

“I know I’m not the tallest, hottest guy here. I’m different,” lamented Connor. “I just want to be wanted like everybody wants.”

Damn it, somebody want Connor already.

Joey Kirchner shows that real men snuggle goats.

So, about the derby, which was basically an extended promotion for the BetRivers online casino. There was also a petting zoo with cute bunnies, goats, donkeys, alpacas and even a camel. And everybody wore foam “cowboy leprechaun hats,” in Austin’s words.

There was a race on those inflatable horses and, despite a photo finish with Cole and Sam, Joey and Celine won. I mean, did you think the cowboy was going to lose?

Their “very special prize” was basically a date in a suite — not a fantasy suite, mind you — and a serenade by Canadian singer Tyler Shaw who, mercifully, did not sing anything country.

But despite the candles, the wine and the dancing, Joey and Celine weren’t taking things to the next level, so to speak.

Celine said things were still “surface” between her and Joey; Joey said he was hesitant to push forward with Celine.

Chances are they’ll make it through the next rose ceremony, whenever that is. Beyond that, who knows?

There are other important questions to be answered, like, is there a boom boom room this season or does everybody have to sneak into the sauna like last season?

Next week, Ana Cruz is back along with a new blond contestant who describes herself as “your worst nightmare”; Lisa is in a triangle with Connor and Jake; Maria has words with Nithisha; and it looks like Quartney, who has decided that none of the women are there for the “right reasons,” not just Lisa, will finally take his marbles and go home.

You can watch Monday at 8 p.m. on Citytv. And you can comment here, visit my Facebook page or follow me on Twitter @realityeo

Bachelor in Paradise Canada: Triangles on the beach

May 16, 2023 / Debra Yeo

The “Bachelor in Paradise Canada” cast ahead of Tuesday’s rose ceremony. Three of the women were gone by episode’s end. PHOTO CREDIT: All photos Citytv

Welcome to “Bachelor in Paradise Canada,” Spin the Bottle edition.

I jest, of course. The bottles are either behind the bar with Kevin Wendt or set up on tables during dates for prime product placement. And nobody on the beach was actually playing a teenage kissing game. But there were some serious wandering lips on Monday’s episode.

Take Joey Kirchner, for instance, returning conquering Canadian hero.

It seems he was more hot for the red Ferrari on last week’s date than for fan Shaz Gafoor, even though he kissed her and not the car. “My rose is going to the Ferrari,” Joey joked.

And yes, Joey smooched Shaz again before the rose ceremony, but next thing you know he was on a beach bed with Celine who, after being disappointed by Cole, was vibing wth Joey’s “Alberta charm.”

Celine Paquette and Joey Kirchner get acquainted on Tuesday.

“Joey’s looking like Tim McGraw up in here,” she said. Well, sure, Tim’s still got the abs, I guess.

It wasn’t long before Joey and Celine were using their lips for something besides talking.

Joey ended up giving his rose to Celine and cutting Shaz loose — she wasn’t mad about it — since Shaz was “the horse whisperer,” but Celine was “the horse you’re riding.”

Except Joey was back in the saddle the next day with — wait for it! — Maria.

Somewhere, Vay Paquette — the woman who coupled up with Joey and got insanely jealous of his “friend” Maria last season — is yelling, “I told you so!”

Joey had already admitted during the “Paradise bonfire” that he’d had past dalliances with both Maria and Nithisha. So that’s what Nithisha meant by going out with friends “and stuff.” Hell, the Bachelor Nation hookups at Stagecoach have nothing on this gang.

Maria herself described her connection to Joey as “a really complicated relationship.” But at least she was willing to kiss him — her first kiss in Paradise, no less — which is more than she was willing to do with either Quartney or Connor initially.

Speaking of those two rivals for Lisa Mancini’s affections, both still seemed to be in play in Tuesday’s episode.

American “Bachelorette” alum Quartney had spotted Lisa kissing better known “Bachelorette” alum Connor Brennan the day after Lisa and Quartney’s supposedly “incredible” date.

Was a pissed off Quartney going to withhold his rose from Lisa Mancini? Nah.

Quartney brought it up at the bonfire — more on that event later — and made his displeasure known to Lisa the next day. He even intimated that he might be “done” with Lisa and his rose was up for grabs.

Well, first off, Lisa is one of the season’s stars so you really think the producers would let her go home in the second episode? Secondly, Quartney’s backup plan was apparently Maria, but that fizzled pretty quickly when Maria dodged his kiss. So back to Plan A then?

As for Connor, he took Lisa for a walk, under Quartney’s watchful eye. But despite Lisa’s admiration for “handsome, charming, quirky, funny” Connor, she refused to make out with him.

Lisa was taken, so Connor Brennan tried his charm on Maria Garcia-Sanchez.

So Connor’s Plan B was . . . yep, Maria. Despite how “easy and fun and effortless” things were with Lisa, he found Maria “wildly attractive.” And she accepted his rose at the rose ceremony despite not smooching him beforehand.

The next day, however, the kissing-adverse Maria laid one on Connor — before pulling away and giggling, which seems to be her MO. “You’re very cute, Connor,” she said: not exactly a ringing endorsement, especially since Maria said in her ITM interview she was still in her head about Joey.

So let’s run down the other triangles and, in Cole’s case, quadrangles.

It wasn’t bad enough that ex-“Survivor” player Cole Medders was already torn between fan contestants Sam and Celine. Ex-“Bachelor” alum Rianna decided to make an 11th hour play for Cole.

I think in the game of football that’s called a Hail Mary, except in Rianna’s case it was more like a “no chance in hell.”

It was too little too late for Rianna Hockaday and Cole Medders.

Not that Cole didn’t like Rianna — he said she was “very much my type of person” — and when they kissed they were “in sync,” according to Rianna. But was that really enough to sway Cole from giving his rose to Sam? Nah.

For one thing, I suspect former “Big Brother Canada” contestant Sam is someone the producers want to keep around, partly for entertainment value, partly because there’s some drama brewing between her and Lisa.

Questioned by special guest Demi Burnett at that bonfire I keep mentioning as to whether anyone in Paradise was giving off “toxic vibes,” Sam chose Lisa, saying she gave “backhanded compliments.”

OK, sure Sam.

So let’s talk about the bonfire and “Hurricane Demi,” whose arrival coincided with a storm in Paradise — or that’s how it was edited.

Some umbrellas and cushions blew around; a Muskoka chair caught fire; Demi’s top blew apart: “My titties are flailing,” she said.

But the “Bachelor in Paradise” alum’s arrival and the bonfire she presided over with host Sharleen Joynt were less hurricane than tempest in a teapot. Let’s move on.

We haven’t really talked about the rose ceremony yet, which came in the middle of the episode. We already know where Joey’s, Quartney’s, Connor’s and Cole’s roses went. Austin’s went to Chelsea Vaughn, no surprise there. Matia’s went to Meagan. And Garrett’s went to Nithisha.

Fans Shaz and Linda Charlie joined Rianna on the boat to nowhere. Sorry ladies. I’m pretty sure, unlike last season’s “Bachelor in Paradise” U.S., nobody’s being brought back to the beach and, even if they were, I’m afraid it wouldn’t be any of you.

With the power of the rose switching to the women, it was time to bring some new men to the resort. And along came “Big Brother Canada” alum Godfrey Mangwiza and U.S. “Bachelorette” alum Edward Naranjo (Michelle’s season), with date cards in hand naturally.

Nithisha Ketheeswaran was feeling it with “Bachelorette” alum Edward Naranjo.

They chose Lisa and Nithisha, respectively, to go on an ASMR date, which stands for autonomous sensory meridian response. Basically the women were in one sound booth, the men in another, and they whispered and made sound effects into microphones shaped like ears that travelled into the headphones of their dates.

Godfrey said ASMR is “on the line between sexy and weird,” which sounds about right. But whereas Godfrey found Lisa’s sound effects “cute,” Edward found sexual chemistry in Nithisha’s.

So no new competition for Quartney then, but Garrett, who knows Edward from Michelle’s season? Well, hmmm, Nithisha was already vibing with Edward over the fact he seemed to like camping and hiking as much as she did. When they sat down for drinks and he whispered, “I would really love to feel your lips” into her ear in Spanish, it was “Garrett who?”

Yes, there was mucho smooching, although Nithisha failed to volunteer that information when she met up with Garrett later. In fact, she said she didn’t feel “a spark” with Edward, that she was thinking of Garrett the whole time and she was almost certain Garrett was the “right one” for her.

Girl, what?

The truth about the smooch was outed when Joey asked Edward at the bar, in front of Garrett, if he had kissed Nithisha. Her response to Garrett when he confronted her: “If you’d asked me I would have said yeah.” Oh dear.

I feel for her, I do.

Nobody should be getting all that possessive at this stage of the game, but Nithisha probably should have ‘fessed up about the kiss to Garrett on her own. But where would be the fun in that for the producers, I guess?

Next week, cute animals! And holy hell, is that Lisa kissing Cole? Also, a new guy named Jake walks in and seems to have the women’s hearts aflutter.

You can watch Monday at 8 p.m. on Citytv. And you can comment here, visit my Facebook page or follow me on Twitter @realityeo

Bachelor in Paradise Canada: Joey and Lisa return as stars

May 9, 2023 / Debra Yeo

Joey Kirchner makes his entrance on the “Bachelor in Paradise Canada” Season 2 premiere. PHOTO CREDIT: All photos Citytv

I know we just finished with the coronation of King Charles III in England, but is it too early to crown a king and queen of the lake?

That was a rhetorical question. “Bachelor in Canada Paradise” finally premiered its second season on Monday with a couple of Canadians as the undisputed stars.

Yes, fan favourites Joey Kirchner and Lisa Mancini are back and they’re ready to play. (And they’ve got a nicer spot to play in, now that production has moved to the Christie’s Mill Inn and Spa in Port Severn, Ont.)

Joey strutted in, pecs and biceps popping, running his fingers through his now longish hair, like the reality TV star he has become. And Lisa, the show’s unofficial narrator, was her usual funny self and managed not to fall off her platform shoes or cry during the first episode, unlike last season.

Also, it seems doubtful that Lisa will get friend-zoned this year. Several men professed to be into her blue eyes, her cosplaying skills, and her appreciation for the video game “Overwatch” and Nintendo 64’s. But when Lisa got the episode’s first date card she chose Dallas dude and fellow “super nerd” Quartney Nixon from Katie Thurston’s “Bachelorette” season for some smooching and fireworks-watching.

Joey also got a date card and picked one of the “Bachelor Nation” fan contestants, Toronto model Shaz Gafoor, for a spin in a bright red Ferrari and some kissing. (Hold up, Joey got to drive a luxury car and Lisa got, um, a picnic with booze and snacks for her date?)

One question still to be answered: when you take the cowboy out of Alberta is he still a cowboy?

Joey stripped down to his Speedo. Looks like someone has been working out.

Joey turned up in cowboy boots, which he accessorized with a cowboy hat and a pair of black Speedos (the pink ones have been retired in a frame, as seen in the opening credits). But Texas nurse Rianna (Clayton Echard’s season) and Salt Lake City tech CEO Garrett (Michelle Young’s season) were skeptical of his cowboy bona fides.

I doubt Joey would care. And neither would the women, it seems, almost all of whom were angling to be his date, especially Winnipeg flight attendant Celine, who showed up in cowboy boots of her own, and Stouffville fan Nithisha, who said she and Joey had hung out with friends in Toronto.

Nithisha, it seems, gets around. She had also, ahem, hung out with Connor “The Cat” Brennan of “Bachelorette” and American “Paradise” fame after sliding into his DMs.

“Did you hook up?” a producer asked.

“Possibly,” said Nithisha. So yes, then.

But Connor wasn’t interested in rekindling anything of a romantic nature, saying he didn’t feel “a magic spark” with Nithisha.

Squirrel-loving St. Catharines “mermaid” Lisa Mancini was the belle of the beach.

He was sparking — for now anyway — with Lisa, saying that Quartney was too strait-laced for her and she needed someone who could “match her level of weirdness.”

And don’t feel sorry for Nithisha getting friend-zoned. Before she started drooling over Joey she was smooching it up with Garrett.

The thing is: nobody is particularly serious about anybody at this point. There is no joined-at-the-hip Brendan and Illeana situation going on so far — and it’s not like that worked out particularly well last season.

So let’s see, we had Lisa kissing both Quartney and Connor; California “Bachelorette” alum Austin (Katie’s season) laying lips on both Brooklyn model Chelsea (Matt’s season and “Paradise”) and Yellowknife fan Linda; and then there was Cole Medders.

The ex-“Survivor” player and professional rock climber was the hottest thing on the beach next to Joey and soon found himself in a lust triangle with Celine and Sam, who bonded with Cole over their ADHD. They also have past reality TV experience in common since Sam, a Newfoundlander, was on “Big Brother Canada.”

Sam could very well become a new “Paradise” fan favourite. She gives good quip in her ITMs. But it looks like there’s a rocky road ahead for her and Cole.

The episode’s other hook-up involved Matia, a cocky former pro hockey player from Toronto whom Lisa pegged as a “cabana douche babe” and “f-boy,” with Vancouver fan Meagan. But Meagan deduced her heart was going to get hurt, a good guess since the season promo appeared to show Matia kissing Maria.

Remember her? The Colombian-born clothing designer who was the target of Vay’s wrath in Season 1 for being friends with Joey?

Oh well, it’s “Paradise.” Best not to take it seriously, not at this stage anyway.

The episode ended with one of those tired “a storm is coming” cliches and Demi Burnett, ex of “The Bachelor” and two rounds of “Bachelor in Paradise,” showing up at the resort, apparently with a date card in hand.

Look, I thought “Hurricane Demi” was a spent force after her second go-round on U.S. “Paradise,” so I’m not sure what she’ll add by stirring the pot, as she claimed, on this side of the border. I guess we’ll see.

You can watch Monday at 8 p.m. on Citytv. And you can comment here, visit my Facebook page or follow me on Twitter @realityeo

Tag: Bachelor in Paradise Canada (Page 1 of 2)

Bachelor in Paradise Canada brings sparkling end to season

Bachelor in Paradise Canada: couples implode on the beach

Bachelor in Paradise Canada: ‘stupid drama’ Knee-Gate puts Maria and Josh on their heels

Bachelor in Paradise Canada: ‘too many pickles’ on the beach

Bachelor in Paradise Canada: a bum steer for Austin and Chelsea

Bachelor in Paradise Canada: ‘wild Joey’ runs free on the beach

Bachelor in Paradise Canada: Babes on the beach, dogs too

Bachelor in Paradise Canada: Follow the bouncing lips

Bachelor in Paradise Canada: Triangles on the beach

Bachelor in Paradise Canada: Joey and Lisa return as stars

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