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Month: February 2023

Bachelor recap: Naked greed for Kat, an early exit for Jess

February 28, 2023 /
Aly, Brooklyn, Gabi, Kaity, Jess and Kat on a group date in Estonia with Zach and a witch.
PHOTO CREDIT: All photos except screen grabs Craig Sjodin/ABC

Naked bodies at a nude sauna in Estonia weren’t the only things exposed on Monday’s episode of “The Bachelor.”

The shallowness of some of Zach Shallcross’s supposed “connections” was also revealed when Jess Girod went home early.

Sure, Jess sounded like a broken record when she kept repeating that she was the only one left without a one-on-one date (actually, Greer hadn’t had one either, but Greer was out of commission with COVID-19), but Jess had a point.

Zach basically told her that one-on-ones aren’t important, but that’s nonsense: they are.

It’s not unprecedented for a woman to make final four without a one-on-one — Corinne Olympios did it on Nick Viall’s season — but it’s pretty rare, as is getting to hometowns when you’re the last person to get an individual date.

So Jess had reason for concern. What was really interesting was watching Zach keep reassuring Jess that he was “confident about us” as she cried and expressed her fears, and then watching him tune out when she wouldn’t stop talking about wanting a one-on-one.

And suddenly it was “I’m not feeling that confident” from Zach.

Zach ran out of patience with Jess Girod’s desire for a one-on-one date.

“I’m not begging for you, I’m not doing that,” Jess told Zach tearfully before he walked her out.

After, as a van took her away, Jess asked, “If it’s someone I wanna marry wouldn’t I want to feel like he wants to take me on a date? So for him to be shocked that I’m, like, hurt is crazy to me.”

Yes, us too, Jess.

Zach cried after Jess left and was supposedly so broken up that he ended the group date after-party without giving out a rose. Why all the emotion for someone he’d only ever gone on group dates with? Who knows?

Speaking of dates, Charity finally got her one-on-one after it was cancelled in London, England, when Zach got COVID.

(And speaking of COVID, I have questions. If Greer only talked to Zach through a video screen, whom did she get COVID from? And if she had it, how come none of the other women did?)

But not so fast! Zach had been locked away in his room and Kat had to make up for lost time! So she whisked Zach into the hallway before he and Charity could set off to coo at and kiss him.

“Call me greedy, but I don’t care,” she told Zach.

OK, you’re greedy. And she very much cared when she was called out for stepping on Charity’s moment.

Gabi noted that Zach had lip gloss on his lips when he came back into the hotel suite “which I don’t think he applied himself.”

After Kat burbled about how much she had missed Zach, Aly told her, “If that would have happened before my date it would have messed me up in the head.”

Brooklyn was more blunt and I’m here for it. She described Kat’s steal as tactless and selfish, and then Kat started complaining about “offensive words” being used and I’m sorry, but get over yourself. More on all this later.

Zach and Charity Lawson take a carriage ride through Tallinn, Estonia.

Back to Charity’s date. It wasn’t a princess date, but she and Zach tooled around picturesque Tallinn in a horse-drawn carriage.

Not quite as romantic: entering the “wife-carrying” race they, ahem, just happened to stumble on, which involved Zach running an obstacle course while carrying Charity on his back — with her face in his ass.

The friendly Estonian who invited them to enter the race told them it was a really popular sport and I was pretty skeptical but, unless Google is punking me, there are even wife-carrying world championships held in Finland, which Estonia has won a bunch of times. Go figure.

Charity also got to partake in more dignified local customs like drinking booze that made her gag, sampling sweet almonds — what is Zach’s obsession with tossing food into the women’s mouths? — and marzipan.

That was all just the appetizer for the confessional main course.

The women have regularly revealed past relationship trauma on the dinner portion of the one-on-ones and Charity was no different.

She told Zach she had been emotionally abused, cheated on and manipulated in her previous relationship and it was still clearly very hard for Charity to talk about.

Points to Zach for holding her hand and comforting her. Points taken away for him comparing his experiences to hers, saying he too had lost himself in his previous relationship.

First off, I hope he’s not still talking about Rachel Recchia. Secondly, I don’t think that not being able to remember your favourite music is in the same ball park as emotional manipulation. Third, isn’t that kind of comparison of dissimilar situations exactly what Zach got mad at Greer for?

Alas, Charity got the date rose and said she was “100 per cent falling for Zach.” I foresee heartbreak in her future.

The group date was next. There always seems to be at least one “woo woo” date when “The Bachelor” visits a foreign country and this was it.

Zach, Kaity, Brooklyn, Jess, Kat, Gabi and Aly with an Estonian witch.

Brooklyn, Kaity, Kat, Gabi, Aly and Jess met up with Zach and an Estonian grand witch whom the show didn’t even bother to name with a chyron. And, of course, she was there to help them find love and to cleanse negative energy, a hard chore as Brooklyn continued to glower at Kat.

“There’s not enough sage in the world to cleanse Kat,” said Brooklyn after Zach wafted burning clumps of sage over the women. “If she was sage herself still wouldn’t help.”

Also of note, during an exercise in which Zach stared into the women’s eyes through a candle flame, the candle went out when it was Jess’s turn. As the witch said, “Oops.”

Since we already know how the group date ended, let’s turn our attention back to the Brooklyn and Kat feud.

Kat continued to insist she was justified in stealing Zach before Charity’s date because all bets were off once he got COVID. But as Ariel very sensibly pointed out, “I don’t think respect ever shifts, though.”

Kat’s retort to Brooklyn, who accused her of being classless and disrespectful, was that it was up to Charity to call Kat out, not Brooklyn. But when Charity tried to have a post-one-on-one conversation about it, Kat declined because she didn’t want to ruin the group date.

“You have your head up your ass,” Brooklyn said, and I couldn’t agree more. Also, “if the shoe fits then light that bitch up.”

Here’s my issue: of course certain women are going to steal time when they can; it’s part of the game. And I also realize we’re only seeing the edit of Kat’s reactions, so maybe she abjectly apologized to Charity and we missed it.

Where Kat lost me is when she made herself the victim. Boo hoo, Brooklyn is saying mean things to me. If you do something that you know is going to piss people off, own it and accept the consequences.

OK, moving on to Ariel’s one-on-one date.

Speaking of being disrespectful, how ridiculous that the producers sent Zach and Ariel to a nude sauna just so they could titter over the fact there were naked people there (while keeping their bathing suits on). Their guide Laura explained that traditional saunas are sacred in Estonia, but there was nothing reverent about the way in which Zach and Ariel approached the experience.

Ariel and Zach are joined by nude people at the nude sauna. Wow, imagine that.

They laughed and joked through the pre-sauna relaxation ritual and, once in the sauna, sniggered at the sight of two middle-aged bodies. It was pretty rude.

During the meal portion of the date, Ariel was set up as the potential dark horse of the season. “I feel like she could be my best friend,” Zach said, which in his lexicon equates to wife.

But then he had to go and do exactly what he did to Charity: when Ariel told him that she’d had many heartbreaks and had “kind of stopped loving myself” through them, Zach responded that he had similar experiences. “My fear is losing myself,” he said. I’m sorry dude, but it’s not all about you, even if you are the Bachelor.

Ariel is lovely. I’m not loving Zach much after this episode.

Next up was the rose ceremony and I really am grateful we’re getting a rose ceremony at the end of every episode.

Kat was the locus of the cocktail party drama. When Charity tried once again to talk to her about the pre-date steal, Brooklyn interrupted and Kat walked out to go and sniffle all by herself about how she kept getting “pushed down.”

What? You thought Kat Izzo wasn’t going to get a rose from Zach?

And wouldn’t you know that was the moment Zach came to find her? Would she tattle on Brooklyn? She did not, but Zach told Kat something felt “a little off” between them on the witch date, which set up the false narrative that Kat might get sent home.

She didn’t, of course. Aly got dispatched while Gabi, Kaity and Brooklyn also got roses.

So seven women are going into next week’s adventures in Budapest, vying for the coveted hometown dates. That includes Greer, who will make her post-COVID return. Not that it’s going to help her much.

Who’s that pulling away in a van in the promo? And who’s got Zach crying?

You can watch Monday at 8 p.m. on Citytv and you can comment here, visit my Facebook page or follow me on Twitter @realityeo

Watchable on CBC, Apple, Disney Feb. 27 to March 5, 2023

February 27, 2023 /

SHOW OF THE WEEK: Plan B (Feb. 27, 9 p.m., CBC/CBC Gem)

Karine Vanasse as Evelyn and Patrick J. Adams as Philip in “Plan B.”
PHOTO CREDIT: Panagiotis Pantazidis/Courtesy of CBC

If the path to true love never runs smooth, the path after one finds that love can be just as rocky, if not more so, as anyone in a long-term relationship knows.

That’s the crux of this drama, a remake of a French-language version that ran for three seasons in Quebec.

We first meet Philip (Patrick J. Adams) and Evelyn (Karine Vanasse) in the first blush of passion after they’re introduced by Evelyn’s brother — and Philip’s business partner — Patrick (Francois Arnaud, “Blindspot”).

Six years later, they’re living together in a house that’s a construction zone, and Evelyn has sidelined her aspirations of being a professional cellist to act as a paralegal for Philip and Patrick’s fledgling law firm, which is trying to land a major contract. Philip is concerned with building a successful life; Evelyn feels unseen and unheard, so she leaves.

When pleading can’t win her back, a drunken Philip takes drastic measures, calling the phone number for Plan B, a service that promises second chances. Next thing you know, he’s being whisked two days into the past by a pair of solemn-faced identical twins in a white van that drives backwards.

So yes, this is a time travel drama, but the supernatural element is not the main point of the show, at least not in the three episodes made available for review.

Philip figures that by going back in time to just before the tense morning that precipitated Evelyn’s departure he can save the relationship. And it seems to work at first but, as any sci-fi aficionado knows, you can’t change future events without consequences. So getting Evelyn to stay has unexpected repercussions, not just on the relationship but on the business and on Philip’s alcoholic brother, Andy (Joshua Close).

That leads to another trip into the past and yet more unforeseen consequences, and it remains to be seen what Philip will salvage out of the growing mess by the end of the first six episodes.

“We plan, God laughs,” the old Yiddish saying goes. And it becomes clear that Philip’s desire to control and fix everything is at the root of his problems.

“Plan B” invites viewers to reflect on the unpredictability of life; on the difficulty of really knowing even the people we’re closest to; and the tendency of human beings to assume a level of control over their circumstances that’s really just an illusion.

Adams and Vanasse are both highly skilled actors (you can read my Toronto Star interview with them here). Toronto-born Adams is probably best known for “Suits,” but I also very much enjoyed him in “The Right Stuff,” in which he played astronaut John Glenn. Quebec actor Vanasse is known for American series “Revenge” and the movie “Polytechnique” but, for me, will forever be intertwined with the Ontario-made detective drama “Cardinal.”

Although Philip and Evelyn are not always sympathetic, Adams and Vanasse make them relatable.

We in English Canada don’t value our homemade TV shows the way Quebecers do, so I’ll be interested to see how this is received amid all the American stuff dominating our schedules.

CBC Gem also has the documentary “Geographies of Solitude” (March 3), about a naturalist and environmentalist who is the only full-time resident of Sable Island in the Northwest Atlantic Ocean; and acclaimed lesbian love story “Carol” (March 3), directed by Todd Haynes, and starring Cate Blanchett and Rooney Mara.

The Reluctant Traveler (Now on Apple TV+)

Eugene Levy in Tokyo with sumo wrestlers Kensho Sawada and Yoshinori Tashiro
in “The Reluctant Traveler.” PHOTO CREDIT: Apple TV+

(I couldn’t review “The Reluctant Traveler” in last week’s post due to an embargo, so here’s what I wrote about it before I remembered that there was an embargo.)

When you think of Hollywood stars — and Eugene Levy, despite his Canadian roots, is arguably a star — you imagine something of a jet-set lifestyle, of flying all over the world in a comfort the rest of us can only dream of.

Levy, known for everything from “SCTV” to “Schitt’s Creek,” from the “American Pie” films to Christopher Guest mockumentaries like “Best in Show,” has undoubtedly experienced a taste of that, but he also describes himself as a genuinely reluctant traveller: someone who doesn’t really like anything that takes him out of his comfort zone.

And yet, here he is as the host and star of “The Reluctant Traveler,” an eight-part series in which Levy visits eight countries and sometimes ventures out of that self-described zone.

To be sure, this isn’t an extreme travel show. The man is 76 years old after all; 75 when he was shooting the series. 

The things that make Levy uncomfortable can be as simple as going horseback riding in Utah or taking a night hike through the Costa Rican jungle (I’m with him on that one, spiders and snakes, no thanks!). But he also experiences luxuries few of us can hope to replicate without a TV show budget behind us: stays in sumptuous hotels and meals at exclusive restaurants. 

What makes “The Reluctant Traveler” stand out from other travel shows is simply the presence of Eugene Levy. Despite his insistence that he is uncomfortable playing himself on camera (you can read what Levy had to say about the show in my Toronto Star story here), the man is funny when he’s being himself. 

“No cars for old men,” he jokes when he has to climb into a very low sports car in Tokyo.

“The sheep ran as soon as they saw me. Did they see a movie they didn’t particularly care for?” he quips as he helps guide Milo corral critters on a Navajo homestead in Utah.

“This is the last time I have five vodkas with a Finn,” he declares before climbing into a frozen Finnish lake, albeit in a flotation suit.

Somebody on Twitter suggested this series was a ripoff of the Ricky Gervais creation “An Idiot Abroad”; someone at a media Q&A thought it was meant to be like “Travel Man,” hosted by British comedian Richard Ayoade.

My impression is that it’s not meant to be an imitation of anything, but that executive producer David Brindley, as he told the Television Critics Association, saw potential during a phone call in which Levy tried to explain why he was the worst choice for a travel show host and ran with it. 

Speaking personally, although I’m not a reluctant traveller, I felt a kinship seeing some of the things that make Eugene Levy uncomfortable, like heights (although, for the record, I did not close my eyes at the start of my one and only helicopter ride like he did).

Watching an episode set in Venice made me want to fulfil my long held intention of visiting that city; ditto with the one set in Tokyo, a city I merely took a train into and flew out of during a long ago trip to Japan.

There’s a little something for everyone here: beautiful natural views, lively urban sights, gorgeous hotels, enticing food and attractions on which we get perspectives that the average tourist might not experience.

The most affecting part — and what seemed to touch Levy the most deeply — are the human connections he makes. Whether or not we get a second season of “The Reluctant Traveler,” I suspect those are the memories that he’ll savour when he looks back on the experience. 

Short Takes

Hoarders Canada (March 4, 8 p.m., Makeful)

Once you get over the shock and awe of a home so full of stuff that the occupant is essentially unable to live in the house, you see the pain and suffering of the mental disorder behind the hoarding. At least that was my impression based on the two episodes made available for review of this Canadian version of the popular American reality show. Both the episodes deal with just one case, that of Rosella, or Roz, a former public health nurse in Winnipeg whose house is so full that she has nowhere to sit, sleeps on half of a double bed and cooks on a couple of hot plates because her stove is under a mountain of stuff. Oh and she has to turn the water on and off each time she uses her leaking toilet, which seems like a tall order for an 80-year-old, not to mention the tripping and fire hazards, and the poor air quality from mould. But as the cleanup begins, with the help of Roz’s daughters and granddaughters, psychologist Murray Anderson and organizer Kim Diamond, there are times it seems like Roz is beyond help. Then Anderson finds an item amid all the junk that enables him to breach her defensiveness and get her to open up about the emotional toll of her hoarding. What it comes down to for viewers is that humanity, in its many variations, is a fascinating subject for other humans and hoarding certainly fits into that.

Odds and Ends

Grogu and Din Djarin (Pedro Pascal) in Season 3 of “The Mandalorian.”
PHOTO CREDIT: ©2023 Lucasfilm Ltd. & TM

I have not yet seen the new episodes of hit “Star Wars” spinoff “The Mandalorian” (March 1, Disney+) but, judging from the trailer, Din Djarin, a.k.a. Mando, is getting introspective about his Mandalorianness and returning to Mandalore to “be forgiven for my transgressions.” And Grogu, a.k.a. Baby Yoda, is right there by his side, which is as it should be. Plus, you know, there’s danger out there in the universe to be handled. Particularly exciting for Canadian fans is that Captain Carson Teva, Paul Sun-Hyung Lee of “Kim’s Convenience,” is back.

Reviews are embargoed for “Daisy Jones & the Six” (March 1, Prime Video), based on the bestselling book about the rise and fall of a world famous 1970s rock band. I think it’s fair to say the series is highly anticipated given the success of the book. Riley Keough (“The Girlfriend Experience”), granddaughter of Elvis Presley and daughter of the recently deceased Lisa Marie Presley, plays Daisy. Sam Claflin (“Peaky Blinders,” “The Hunger Games: Catching Fire”) is Billy Dunne.

The biggest deal on Netflix this week is “Chris Rock: Selective Outrage” (March 4, 10 p.m.), a live-streamed standup special by the comedian. Of course, the big question for everyone is whether Rock will address “the Slap,” when Will Smith struck him during last year’s Oscars for making a joke about Jada Pinkett Smith’s hair. Netflix also has the U.K. quiz show “Cheat” (March 1), in which contestants are encouraged to do exactly that; Season 2 of “Framed! A Sicilian Murder Mystery” (March 2); Season 2 of love triangle drama “Sex/Life” (March 2); true crime series “Monique Olivier: Accessory to Evil” (March 2); Season 2 of Gigi Hadid and Tan France’s “Next in Fashion” (March 3); and South Korean drama “Divorce Attorney Shin” (March 4).

Paramount+ has a treat for fans of Hugh Dillon, the Canadian star of its drama “Mayor of Kingstown.” “Durham County,” a TV show that put the rock star on the map as an actor, debuts on the streamer Feb. 28. It stars Dillon as a homicide detective matching wits with a neighbour and possible serial killer in the first season. It’s worth noting that all three seasons are also on CBC Gem, where you can watch free if you don’t mind some ads.

Crave’s main release this week is the documentary “The Grizzlie Truth” (Feb. 27), which looks at why the Vancouver Grizzlies basketball team only lasted six seasons in Canada before relocating to Memphis.

Speaking of treats, here’s one for BritBox subscribers. The first two seasons of “Staged,” the pandemic comedy in which David Tennant and Michael Sheen played themselves trying to work over Zoom, comes to the streamer March 1. Fair warning: the first season is much better than the second. There’s also a third season, which I have not yet seen, coming to BritBox on March 28.

Fans of HGTV Canada stars Scott McGillivray and Bryan Baeumler will want to know that they’re teaming up for Renovation Resort (March 5, 10 p.m., HGTV), a competition series in which teams of designers and contractors are tasked with renovating cabins at a resort owned by McGillivray.

NOTE: The listings here are in Eastern Standard Time and I’ve verified the times where possible, but it’s always best to check listings for your own area. The selection of programs reviewed reflects what I’m given access to by networks and streamers, whether reviews are embargoed, how many shows I have time to watch and my own personal taste. The Odds and Ends section includes shows that I have not watched.

Bachelor recap: Pip, pip, oh no, as Zach gets COVID in London

February 21, 2023 /
Jess, Brooklyn, Mercedes, Kat, Kaity, Aly, Kylee and Ariel, next to a royal guard, on a Zach-less group date. PHOTO CREDIT: All photos but screen grabs Craig Sjodin/ABC

Forget Brexit, how about a vexit?

Two of the women who joined Bachelor Zach Shallcross in London, England, on this week’s episode got sent away during a virtual rose ceremony, the franchise’s first. There was to be no union, European or otherwise, for Mercedes and Kylee after Zach handed out his roses over a video screen.

Why virtual? Zach got COVID . . . or so we were told.

One does wonder why, if he tested positive just two days after he and Gabi were snogging — yes, snogging, not snugging, Kat — all over London she didn’t have to isolate as well.

Be that as it may, Gabi got the only in-person quality time with Zach all week, unless you count Kaity talking to him through the door of his hotel room.

And Gabi got the Cinderella date to boot, upgraded to queen for a day since they were in the U.K.

Zach and Gabi Elnicki sample scents made for famous folks at Floris.

It began with a visit to Floris, perfumer to the royal family and other mucky-mucks — apparently the scent created for Winston Churchill smelled “old man-y” according to Zach. Is that better or worse than smelling like “Sour Patch Kids” or “Christmas with a little bit of weed,” which is how Gabi described some of the scents they sampled as they created their own bespoke perfume, which they named, um, Zabi.

Zach and Gabi get a visit from some royally pedigreed corgis.

Next up, Grant Harrold, former butler to King Charles III, treated Zach and Gabi to a royal afternoon that included sipping the queen’s cocktail (Dubonnet and gin, Google tells me), trying on tiaras and hats, cavorting with corgis apparently descended from the royal bloodline, enjoying high tea and playing dress-up with what I presume were designer gowns.

This allowed Gabi to reveal that she had struggled with body image issues, but Zach’s reactions to the dresses she tried on were making her feel “the most special I’ve ever felt in my life.”

She chose a frothy, blue confection to wear to dinner, which Zach declared “insane.”

Gabi picks a dress to wear to dinner on her one-on-one.

The real fun came when Gabi returned to the women’s hotel suite, laden with bags of swag, including Jimmy Choo sandals.

You didn’t need Edward from Floris to tell you the scent in the room was envy with a top note of tears.

That was especially true for first impression rose winner Greer, who felt that the fact she loves tea entitled her to a one-on-one in London.

She cried enough tears to fill a teapot and I’m talking about a big-ass Brown Betty.

Now, I know Greer isn’t a fan favourite because of tweets she wrote in 2016 defending blackface, but I confess to being a bit puzzled at the seeming trend to consign first impression rose winners on “The Bachelor” to group date hell.

Nice touch by the producers, though, setting up Greer’s meltdown in front of the door to Gabi’s room. Gabi had to get Greer and Charity, who was comforting Greer, to move as she swished past with her bags of loot. Way to rub “dirt in the wound,” to use Greer’s words.

Gabi’s dream date wasn’t over since she still had dinner with Zach ahead of her. I’m not sure what venerable old building they were in, just that it had lots of wood, mullioned windows and candlelight, but Zach assured Gabi he knew things wouldn’t always be this “extravagant.”

Zach and Gabi enjoy a swanky pretend dinner.

“Who’s the person you want to wake up every morning and do life with?” Zach said.

“I had the experience last season where I thought I knew someone and then learned I didn’t. That was devastating to me. I want that long-lasting love.”

Oooh, another dig at Rachel Recchia!

“I think it’s the little things that make somebody feel so loved,” replied Gabi.

Like, say, Zach making her feel beautiful just by looking at her.

Zach told Gabi she was so beautiful it was insane, which appears to be the word of the week. And he was sorry she hadn’t always felt that way. And she was beautiful inside and out …

And just hurry up already, give her the rose and then you can go dance and kiss to UB40 — yes “Red Red Wine” UB40 — performing “(I Can’t Help) Falling in Love With You.”

So the next day was the group date with Brooklyn, Kat, Aly, Kaity, Ariel, Kylee, Jess, Mercedes and Greer, which is when the wheels came off the double decker bus.

Instead of Zach, host Jesse Palmer showed up with a card, clearly not in Zach’s handwriting, saying he was “a little under the weather” but to enjoy the date and he’d see them soon.

Enjoy? Ha!

Kylee grumbled, “You weren’t too sick to stay up all night with Gabi. You’re not gonna be too sick to go on a one-on-one with Charity tomorrow.”

From left clockwise, Aly, Brooklyn, Greer, Kat, Ariel, Mercedes, Kaity, Kylee and Jess pose on the bus.

“Today sucks,” complained Kaity after they had piled onto a double decker bus for a tour of the city. Ariel said the bagpiper playing “Amazing Grace” in the cold “sounded like a funeral.” And it rained, although one wonders why they didn’t just move inside the bus, you know, to the other level, as in double decker?

Guzzling pints in the Grapes pub did wonders for their moods, though. (Fun fact, it’s one of the oldest pubs in London, according to its website. Charles Dickens used to hang there and actor Ian McKellen is one of the leaseholders.)

Mercedes follows the well-worn path of other annoying tourists in London.

They were feeling perky enough to squish into an old red phone booth — “Who farted?” — eat fish and chips (Mercedes smelling hers first was kind of priceless), and tease a fellow dressed as a royal guard with annoying questions and twerking. Was he really a royal guard? Unclear. He did appear to be standing in front of the Indonesian embassy, but would a royal guard be caught on camera contemptuously raising his eyebrow as the women walked away?

Anyway, the ladies had their game faces and fanciest duds on as they awaited Zach at the after-party only to have a gentleman in a bow tie and dinner jacket deliver a “message from Zachary.”

Yup, still sick, not coming.

If the women were concerned for Zach’s health at this stage, we didn’t see it.

Kat and Kaity cried. Kylee wondered “what is even the point?” Brooklyn said that “selfishly I feel stood up.” Greer doubled down and said she’d been stood up twice.

They consoled themselves by all taking a petal from the discarded date rose.

It was pretty obvious by this point that Charity wasn’t going to get her one-on-one the next day, which she described as “like a toy dangling in my face” that she really wanted. “I don’t know why this happened,” she said.

Well, because Zach got diagnosed with COVID-19, according to Jesse.

It was Zach’s worst nightmare, Jesse said, apparently not because he had a disease that can sometimes be lethal, but because he was losing “quality time” with the women. Priorities, am I right?

Greer managed to muster up, “I just hope he’s OK.”

Kaity, who’s a nurse, was ostensibly so concerned about Zach being all alone in his room with his mind racing — and maybe, I don’t know, feeling sick? — that she took a gift basket to Zach’s room, which was obviously all about making Zach feel better and not about solidifying her position as a front-runner.

Nurse Kaity brings Zach a gift basket because souvenirs are what COVID patients really want.

After a cursory “how are you doing?” she launched into monologue about how not knowing when she’d see Zach again “has taken a toll on me because I’m here for you,” and “I’m just scared that momentum is gonna fall flat” and “I see a future with you.”

Hell of a door-side manner, that Kaity.

Zach assured her he was excited she was there and he saw “something with you,” which sounds a little vague to me, but Kaity was happy enough to leave him the hell alone.

The answer to Jesse’s earlier question — “How do we move forward?” — was the answer many of us came up with during the pandemic: do it on video.

So Zach held a video cocktail party, speaking to the women individually from the screen of a tablet.

I won’t bore you with the inanities of the various chats, except to say that Charity was gifted with a replica of Big Ben that some production lackey obviously bought and hid behind a pillow in the room where Zach held virtual court.

Greer talks up her chances with Charity and Brooklyn before her disaster of a chat.

Greer’s turn came and wow, awkward. First she sat too far away from the tablet; then she said she was glad she couldn’t see herself onscreen because she’d probably just look at herself instead of Zach. And when she tried to commiserate by comparing Zach missing dates because of COVID to her missing her sales goal because of COVID, Zach seemed to take offence.

Finding his future wife “means a lot more to me than the end of a sales quarter,” he chided Greer.

If I were Greer I would figure I was going home too, but when Zach virtually handed out his roses — looking solemn on a large screen as the women picked them up from a basket on a table — Greer got the last one. Go figure.

Kaity, Charity, Aly, Kat, Brooklyn, Jess and Ariel also got roses, so nine women are moving on to wherever they end up next week.

The end-of-episode promo previewed the rest of the season rather than the next episode and it looks like there might be some non-fantasy suite hanky panky in Zach’s future, although these things can be deceiving.

You can watch Monday at 8 p.m. on Citytv and you can comment here, visit my Facebook page or follow me on Twitter @realityeo

Watchable on Netflix, AMC+, Apple Feb. 20 to 26, 2023

February 20, 2023 /

No show of the week this week, thanks to a light week for new releases (ones I was interested in, at least) and embargoes.

Short Takes

Father Alex Murdaugh, left, mother Maggie Murdaugh, right, son Paul Murdaugh and girlfriend Morgan Doughty in “Murdaugh Murders: A Southern Scandal.” PHOTO CREDIT: Courtesy of Netflix © 2023

Murdaugh Murders: A Southern Scandal (Feb. 22, Netflix)

It feels to me like true crime series have been on a downward trajectory since early entries like “Making a Murderer” and “The Jinx.” This show set in the Lowcountry of South Carolina doesn’t quite meet that high standard, but neither is it bait-and-switch nonsense like “The Vanishing at the Cecil Hotel.” It starts out as the story of the death of teenager Mallory Beach in 2019, who was killed when Paul Murdaugh, scion of a family of big-shot lawyers in Hampton County, drunkenly drove a boat into a bridge piling in the Beaufort River. As the other people who were in the boat tell it, in very detailed interviews about the crash and its aftermath, the powerful Murdaughs did everything possible to keep it from being pinned on Paul. He was eventually charged with boating under the influence and the Murdaugh family’s fortunes seemed to spiral from there. Paul’s charges still hadn’t gone to trial when Paul and his mother, Maggie, were shot to death on one of the Murdaughs’ vast properties in 2021. The doc explores that case, which is still before the courts (I’m not giving spoilers, but you can easily google who was charged), as well as two other deaths rumoured to be linked to the Murdaughs. And there’s more: drug addiction, theft, insurance fraud, money laundering, even a staged shooting. As in many of these types of series, you won’t get definitive answers on everything, but there’s food for thought about the harms that can arise when privilege is allowed to run amok.

Netflix also has Season 3 of teen mystery series “Outer Banks” (Feb. 23); Season 2 of kids’ comedy “That Girl Lay Lay” (Feb. 23); and Season 5 of docuseries “Formula 1: Drive to Survive” (Feb. 24).

Black Snow (Feb. 23, AMC+)

This Australian series has some of the hallmarks of your typical murder mystery: a dead teenage girl, a troubled lead detective, a small town guarding its secrets. What makes it different is that the series weaves the Australian history of “blackbirding” — luring or forcing Pacific Islanders to the country to do hard labour for low wages — into the criminal case. Isabel Baker (Talijah Blackman-Corowa) was murdered in 1994 after leaving her high school prom in her small town in Queensland. The opening of a time capsule 25 years later, in which Isabel placed a letter accusing members of the community of being “predators” who might kill her, leads to the reopening of the cold case, led by detective James Cormack (Travis Fimmel, “Vikings”) from Brisbane. Isabel comes from a South Sea Islander family whose great-great-grandfather was kidnapped in Vanuatu and brought to Queensland to work in the sugar cane fields (the series title comes from the black ash from the sugar factory that sometimes falls like snow). As Cormack investigates, sometimes butting heads with and sometimes teaming up with Hazel (Jemmason Power), Isabel’s sister, various potential suspects are revealed: Isabel’s white best friend Chloe and her father, Steve, who owns the town’s sugar plantation and exploits his migrant workers; her white boyfriend Anton, who was cheating on her with fellow student Tasha; nerdy outsider Hector, who was obsessed with Isabel; Tasha’s brother Billy, who did Steve’s dirty work; Ezekiel, a migrant worker in the country illegally, even her own father, Pastor Joe, who disapproved of her relationship with Anton. As he investigates, Cormack becomes convinced Isabel’s murder is tied to the disappearance of two of Ezekiel’s cousins, who were also in Australia illegally. The plot can meander when it pulls its focus from Isabel’s slaying, and some loose ends are left untied, but it’s compelling enough to watch all six episodes. Fimmel brings typical intensity to his role as Cormack while Power and Blackman-Corowa, both newcomers to acting and both of South Sea Islander heritage, give depth to Hazel and Isabel. It’s particularly welcome that we get to see Isabel, in numerous flashbacks to 1994, as a fully realized person and not just a murder victim.

Eugene Levy in Tokyo with sumo wrestlers Kensho Sawada and Yoshinori Tashiro
in “The Reluctant Traveler.” PHOTO CREDIT: APPLE TV PLUS

The Reluctant Traveler (Feb. 24, Apple TV+)

This would have been my show of the week except that Apple TV+ has decided to embargo reviews until Feb. 23 and strictly embargo them to boot. So I can’t tell you what I think of the show; I can only tell you what to expect. Canadian actor and comedian Eugene Levy, known for everything from “SCTV” to “Schitt’s Creek,” from the “American Pie” films to Christopher Guest mockumentaries like “Best in Show,” is the host and star here as he travels to eight countries experiencing everything from dog-sledding in Finland to hiking the jungle at night in Costa Rica to plying the canals of Venice to feeding rhinos in South Africa to stargazing on Navajo territory in Utah. The twist is that Levy is a self-described reluctant traveller who says he usually doesn’t like venturing out of his comfort zone (you can read what Levy had to say about the show in my Toronto Star story here).

Apple also has the “thriller” series “Liaison” (Feb. 24), starring Eva Green and Vincent Cassel. She plays a British intelligence agent; he plays a French defence contractor in a plot that has something to do with Syrian hackers and cyber-attacks on the U.K. Quite honestly, I got interrupted three-quarters of the way through the first episode and had no interest in finishing it, so make of that what you will.

Push (Feb. 24, 8:30 p.m., CBC/CBC Gem)

This docuseries shot in Alberta showcases a group of friends known as the “Wheelie Peeps” since they all use wheelchairs or other mobility devices. The ringleader is vibrant Benveet “Bean” Gill, founder of the ReYu Recovery Centre for people with spinal cord injuries, who as the series opens is marking her 10th rebirthday: the anniversary of her paralysis. We’re also introduced, among others, to Brian, who’s celebrating his first relationship anniversary with Victoria; Natasha, who’s about to give birth; and Brittney and Ricardo, who organize a protest when the Alberta government cuts funding for catheter tubes, forcing them and other people with lower body paralysis to “pay to pee.” The series is clearly meant to present its subjects as people living their lives who just happen to be disabled. As Bean says, “We’re just a bunch of people on wheels figuring things out.”

Odds and Ends

Christoph Waltz as Regus Patoff in “The Consultant.” PHOTO CREDIT: Amazon Studios

Prime Video’s main release this week is “The Consultant” (Feb. 24), a comedy (a dark one I presume) starring Oscar winner Christoph Waltz as a consultant brought into a struggling gaming company who seems to have a murderous way of doing business. Prime also has the movie “Die Hart” (Feb. 24), in which Kevin Hart stars as a fictional Kevin Hart who wants to be an action star.

Fans of the British-French crime dramedy “Death in Paradise” are no doubt stoked about the spinoff series “Beyond Paradise” (Feb. 23, BritBox), in which detective Humphrey Goodman (Kris Marshall, “Sanditon,” “Love Actually”) has left the island of Saint Marie to solve crimes in Devon, with Martha (Sally Bretton) by his side.

NOTE: The listings here are in Eastern Standard Time and I’ve verified the times where possible, but it’s always best to check listings for your own area. The selection of programs reviewed reflects what I’m given access to by networks and streamers, whether reviews are embargoed, how many shows I have time to watch and my own personal taste. The Odds and Ends section includes shows that I have not watched.

Bachelor recap: Instagram claims its first victim of the season

February 14, 2023 /
Zach Shallcross with dates Jess, Gabi, Kaity, Aly, Charity, Greer, Kylie, Anastasia, Ariel, Genevie, Davia and Mercedes before the trouble began. PHOTO CREDIT: All photos but screen grabs Craig Sjodin/ABC

The first rule of Fight Club is you do not talk about Fight Club. Also Instagram, you never, ever, ever, ever talk about Instagram.

Anastasia found that out on Monday’s episode of “The Bachelor” when she became the second woman to be dispatched so Zach Shallcross can maintain a drama-free zone. (Looks like his luck might run out on that point next week.)

Anastasia’s first sin was getting aggressive on what was supposed to be a chill beach group date after Zach and his harem decamped to the Bahamas – which host Jesse Palmer, the new spokesman for the Bahamas tourism board, tells us is “one of the most beautiful and one of the most romantic places in the entire world.”

And by aggressive, I don’t mean physical, although Anastasia suggested that Kylee was ready to put up her dukes after the two got into a verbal tussle over time with Zach.

Anastasia Keramidas learned that it isn’t always better in the Bahamas.

Basically, Anastasia scooped Zach up for some alone time on the beach during said group date; Kylee got jealous and tried to interrupt; Anastasia asked for more time with Zach; Kylee said, “Please just let me have him, I don’t like to fight but”; Anastasia replied, “I’m definitely not gonna fight you” and then proceeded to tell everyone who would listen that Kylee had been spoiling for fisticuffs.

I mean it feels ridiculous even writing all that out.

Kylee got her revenge at the afterparty when she told Zach that Anastasia had been overheard talking about how many Instagram followers she was going to gain being on “The Bachelor.”

Alert! Alert! Alert! Somebody is not here for the right reasons!

Zach checked the story with Charity, who seems like a pretty straight arrow and had indeed heard Anastasia say that the 14 women who were still around would get at least 50,000 Instagram followers apiece, which doesn’t seem like enough to get excited about, but fine.

Anastasia got a stay of execution at the afterparty, but Zach sent her packing on rose ceremony night right at the beginning of the cocktail party, despite Anastasia protesting her innocence.

This does not seem like a big deal — despite how much it made Kylee cry, go figure — because Anastasia never seemed like more than group date fodder.

What seems more concerning is how many women Zach is getting “excited” about, his new favourite word. I know it’s only Week 4, but he does realize he can only pick one, right?

Let’s see: Zach was excited about Kat after a “very exciting” one-on-one date; he was excited about Kylee; he was excited about Kaity; he was excited about Brooklyn; after chatting with Gabi, he said he was “excited about all the connections I have.” He was also excited about Ariel but, judging from those smooches and the way they were blowing on those conch shells, I think it was a given.

“You didn’t play conch in your school band?” Zach asked, although it came out sounding like “cock.”

“I didn’t, I was a virgin,” Ariel replied.

Ba dump bum.

So what excited Zach about Kat, his first one-on-one of the episode?

First a digression: Kat getting the date card and tactlessly blurting out that she and Zach would be in the water and it would be “very intimate” made Greer cry. And who could blame her? She got the first impression rose, but now Zach seems to have forgotten who she is. My guess is she’s not going to make final four.

Kat Izzo and Zach get “intimate” with sunscreen on a catamaran.

But back to Kat. Zach said Kat looks like a model and “I’m like, I never dated a model.” Also, she has SPFing skills, judging from the time they spent smoothing sunscreen on each other. And she enjoys awkward dancing.

But oh no, what if Kat’s dinnertime confession drove Zach away? Are you ready? She had . . . an unhappy upbringing and left home at one point because of her bad relationship with her mom. That’s it?

Look, I don’t mean to minimize Kat’s obvious pain over this, but when is this show going to stop acting like everybody who didn’t have a perfect childhood needs to be ashamed of it? Sometimes parents suck, it’s not the kids’ fault.

Obviously Zach didn’t banish Kat over this and you’ve got to give the guy credit for being both emotionally intelligent and articulate. “I want to love my person for who they are, not for what they came from,” he said.

Kat got the date rose and copious smooches, but then Zach said that kissing Kat was “like two meteors just perfectly colliding and creating a star,” which makes zero sense. Cue the fireworks.

So we’ve already discussed the group date which, besides Anastasia’s and Kylee’s dust-up, was notable for Gabi’s shellfish allergy.

Since a lot of what was being consumed on the beach was shellfish, Gabi worried that she wouldn’t get noticed by Zach since she couldn’t participate in activities like conch fritter tossing. “I literally can’t kiss Zach because he had shellfish,” she said tearily.

Where is Shanae with a bowl full of shrimp when you need her?

Speaking of conch, the group date rose went to Ariel.

Brooklyn Willie gets the action date on “The Bachelor.”

Zach’s second one-on-one was with Brooklyn and it was a pretty standard driving ATVs and smooching on the beach outing.

Zach said he wanted Brooklyn to open up and he got his wish at dinner, when she told a harrowing story about being in an emotionally and physically abusive relationship for six years with a man just like her father. (Apparently ABC warned viewers that discretion was advised before Brooklyn’s story, although I didn’t see the warning here in Canada.)

“I was a shell of the person I was,” Brooklyn said. “I woke up one day and I was like, no, this can’t define me. I truly believe if I wouldn’t have just woke up and got out I can literally guarantee I would not be sitting here right now.”

Zach told Brooklyn how sorry he was she had gone through that. “You are so fucking tough,” he said. And I think she would have to be to escape the abuse and rebuild her self-esteem the way she apparently has.

After Zach handed over the rose they danced and kissed as an apparently nameless man sang and played guitar.

Then it was rose ceremony time.

Once he’d sent Anastasia home, Zach wasted no time doling out kisses to favourites like Charity and Kat.

Kylee Russell chats up Zach on the group date, before the deluge of tears.

Kylee cried a lot after Anastasia left, initially because she said she didn’t want to be the cause of someone going home — although what did she think was going to happen after she told Zach about the Instagram stuff? — but really because she was afraid she would be collateral damage in the drama.

She wasn’t the only one getting teary. Davia could sense her connection with Zach dwindling. She made a valiant effort to rekindle, but when Zach talked about their “fast, hot connection” in the past tense and gave her a kiss that seemed more polite than passionate, it was clear it was time for Davia to join the “Bachelor in Paradise” talent roster.

Despite Kylee’s carrying on — at one point she told Mercedes she was going to self-eliminate because she couldn’t handle the rose ceremony — she got her damn rose. So did Charity, Kaity, Gabi, Jess, Mercedes, Aly and Greer, leaving Davia and Genevie to go home.

Next week, the chosen 11 head to London with Zach, where Jesse shares “some really bad news” that leaves everybody crying and Jesse saying, “The million dollar question now is what are we gonna do?”

You can watch Monday at 8 p.m. on Citytv and you can comment here, visit my Facebook page or follow me on Twitter @realityeo

Watchable on Crave, CBC, Prime Video Feb. 13 to 19, 2023

February 13, 2023 /

SHOW OF THE WEEK: Star Trek: Picard (Feb. 16, 9 p.m., CTV Sci-Fi Channel/Crave)

Jonathan Frakes as Will Riker and Patrick Stewart as Jean-Luc Picard in “Star Trek: Picard.”
PHOTO CREDIT: Trae Paatton/Paramount+/CBS Studios Inc.

Jean-Luc himself, Patrick Stewart, says the third season of “Star Trek: Picard” is not a “Star Trek: The Next Generation” reunion, which may be so, but adding characters from that beloved show to this “Trek” spinoff gives it a much needed reset.

I watched the first two seasons of this series built around the greatest starship captain ever (sorry, Captain Kirk) mainly out of loyalty to the franchise — I started watching “The Original Series” as a kid in the 1960s — but I’m not going to pretend they were indispensable additions to the canon.

What made Captain Picard so memorable as a character came in relation to the “Next Generation” crew members who served with him on the USS Enterprise-D. Although there were appearances by “Next Gen” originals like Will Riker and Deanna Troi in the first two seasons of “Picard,” he was mainly surrounded by new characters who never really gelled.

Is anybody going to be reminiscing decades from now about Picard’s adventures with Agnes or Rios or Tallinn? Unlikely.

So, yes, it’s good news that Picard is back with Riker (Jonathan Frakes), Beverly Crusher (Gates McFadden), Geordi La Forge (LeVar Burton), Worf (Michael Dorn), Troi (Marina Sirtis) and a facsimile of Data (Brent Spiner) on yet another mission to save Starfleet and the galaxy.

“Voyager” vet Seven of Nine (Jeri Ryan) is also still around and central to the plot.

The bad news is that some of the first two seasons’ sins — hamfisted exposition, clunky dialogue and occasionally gimmicky plotting — persist.

Season 3 opens with Picard getting an encrypted distress call from Crusher, whom he hasn’t spoken to in more than two decades. She and a mysterious passenger (if I tell you anything about him, I think CBS will send someone to my door with a Klingon bat’leth) are under attack just outside Federation space.

Picard enlists a game Riker to ride to Beverly’s rescue, which they do with the help of Seven and a not so game Captain Shaw (Todd Stashwick), the new commander of Will’s old ship the Titan and the season’s best new character. (Sidney La Forge, daughter of Geordi, played by Ashlei Sharpe Chestnut, is no slouch either, while Burton’s real-life daughter Mica plays a small role as Geordi’s daughter Alandra.)

There’s also a new baddie, Vadic, a scenery-chewing Amanda Plummer.

Meanwhile, Raffi (Michelle Hurd) — the only character remaining from Picard’s seasons 1 and 2 crew — is on the planet M’talas Prime trying to figure out who stole deadly weapons from the Daystrom Station, a subplot that doesn’t really get interesting until she teams up with Worf who, in an overstretched gag, is now a meditating, chamomile tea-drinking pacifist.

The first four episodes of Season 3 are devoted to Picard, Riker et al on the Titan extricating themselves from what appears to be a hopeless situation involving Vadic’s relentless pursuit of Crusher’s passenger, a powerful new weapon, a saboteur on board and the deadly energy of the nebula in which the Titan becomes trapped. It’s a lot, but it can’t really be no-win since we know there are six more episodes to go.

This also provides time for Picard, Riker and Crusher to revisit their relationships; for Shaw to earn both our antipathy and our admiration; for Picard to get to know a significant new character with links to his past; and for the Titan crew and its new additions to display typical “Star Trek” can-do, we’re all in this together initiative.

The plot threads really start to come together in episodes 5 and 6 (the only other episodes provided to critics) and we finally get to see most of the returned “Next Generation” characters together in the same room.

There are also Easter eggs and callbacks to shows like “Voyager,” “Deep Space Nine” and even “The Original Series” that I don’t want to spoil by spelling them out.

Bottom line: if you were a “Next Generation” fan you will overlook the series’ flaws for the pleasure of seeing the crew members reunite, even if it’s not a reunion per se.

Short Takes

Coaches Luke Willson, Jen Kish, Waneek Horn-Miller, Donovan Bailey, Gilmore Junio
and Clara Hughes on “Canada’s Ultimate Challenge.” PHOTO CREDIT: CBC

Canada’s Ultimate Challenge (Feb. 16, 8 p.m., CBC/CBC Gem)

CBC has jumped into the physical competition series game with this show that’s a bit like “The Amazing Race” on steroids — if you stripped out everything on that show but the physical challenges and turned them up to 11. I’m not an aficionado of series like “American Ninja Warrior,” but I was gripped watching the competitors on “Canada’s Ultimate Challenge” tough it out in the first episode — especially when one member of each team had to traverse dangling obstacles underneath a 100-metre-high suspension bridge in Squamish, B.C., not just once but twice. There are six teams of four, each coached by a former athlete — including Olympians Donovan Bailey, Clara Hughes, Jen Kish, Gilmore Junio and Waneek Horn-Miller, and former Super Bowl champion Luke Willson — and competing to win a trip to the Paris Olympics. Over eight weeks, they travel across the country with landmarks like the Whistler Olympic Park ski jumps turned into obstacle courses, racking up points until teams start getting eliminated and only one remains.

CBC and CBC Gem also have Season 2 of the far less arduous but also entertaining competition series “Best in Miniature” (Feb. 19, 7 p.m.) and the doc “Apocalypse B” (Feb. 17, 8 p.m., on “The Nature of Things”) about radical ideas for how to turn down the heat on the planet and potentially curtail the effects of climate change.

A Spy Among Friends (Feb. 17, Prime Video)

This is a miniseries that demands your concentration so if you’re tempted to google the names of the real-life people it portrays, best to hit pause when you do so, otherwise you’ll lose the thread of the intricate plot. It tells the story of Kim Philby (Guy Pearce), a notorious British MI6 agent and Soviet spy who defected to Moscow after he was exposed in 1963. The story is set primarily in ’63 after Philby has fled to Russia. Nicholas Elliott (Damian Lewis), Philby’s former friend and fellow MI6 agent, is under suspicion since he was tasked with bringing Philby back to London from Beirut when he got away. MI5 agent Lily Thomas (Anna Maxwell Martin, “Line of Duty,” “The Bletchley Circle”) is in charge of questioning Elliott, who is also under surveillance by the CIA. Got all that? Good, because there’s more. The series also flashes back to Elliott’s and Philby’s pasts, including their efforts against the Nazis during the Second World War and their once close friendship. It’s a series built on conversations punctuated by bursts of action. Luckily, the actors doing the talking are excellent ones. Both Pearce and Lewis are Emmy winners for good reason, and Maxwell Martin more than holds her own.

Prime also has a double dose of Cara Delevingne. The English actor plays herself in “Planet Sex With Cara Delevingne” (Feb. 14), in which she travels the world on erotic adventures; and she stars as a fairy opposite Orlando Bloom in the long delayed second season of fantasy series “Carnival Row” (Feb. 17) .

Thunder Bay (Feb. 17, Crave)

In this four-part docuseries, Anishinaabe journalist Ryan McMahon investigates the deaths of Indigenous people in the city of Thunder Bay and links them to the city’s history of anti-Indigenous racism. If you pay attention to the news, you’ll have already heard of cases like the Seven Fallen Feathers — seven Indigenous teenagers who died in unexplained circumstances in Thunder Bay — and Barbara Kentner, an Indigenous woman who died after a white man threw a trailer hitch at her from a moving car and then laughed about it. (Brayden Bushby was sentenced to eight years in jail for manslaughter in the case.) Here’s a sobering thought revealed in the series: a third of all Indigenous hate crimes in Canada are reported in Thunder Bay. Indigenous people interviewed by McMahon in the first episode says it’s routine to have things thrown at them, whether physical objects or “go back to the rez” type insults. The series, based on McMahon’s Canadaland podcast of the same name, explores that racism along with theories about the unexplained deaths and the role police have played in failing to investigate them properly. It’s ugly, shameful stuff.

Crave also has the streaming debut of “The Woman King” (Feb. 17), in which Oscar winner Viola Davis plays the leader of the women warriors who protected the Kingdom of Dahomey in Africa in the 1800s.

Odds and Ends

Billy Crudup as Jack Billings in “Hello Tomorrow!” PHOTO CREDIT: Apple TV+

One of the week’s most intriguing debuts is “Hello Tomorrow!” (Feb. 17, Apple TV+), a comedy drama in which Billy Crudup stars as a salesman who hawks real estate on the moon with evangelical flair. It’s one of 10 new shows I recommended after attending the Television Critics Association press tour last month but which I haven’t reviewed because of an embargo. Apple also has a new season of surfing series “Make or Break” (Feb. 17) and the movie “Sharper” starring Julianne Moore (Feb. 17).

The most interesting Netflix release this week is “African Queens” (Feb. 15), a series that is part drama, part documentary that tells the story of female rulers in Africa, beginning with Njinga, a warrior princess in Ndongo in present-day Angola. The series is executive produced by Jada Pinkett Smith. Netflix also has “Perfect Match” (Feb. 14), a dating series that puts together alumni of various Netflix reality shows; “Full Swing” (Feb. 15), a docuseries about professional golfers; and Season 3 of sitcom “The Upshaws” (Feb. 16).

Disney+ offers the documentary “j-Hope in the Box” (Feb. 17), in which the member of Korean supergroup BTS is profiled as he creates his first solo album.

The PBS Masterpiece Channel, available on Prime Video in Canada, has popular Norwegian series “Acquitted” (Feb. 17), about a businessman who returns to his hometown 20 years after he was acquitted of murdering his high school girlfriend.

NOTE: The listings here are in Eastern Standard Time and I’ve verified the times where possible, but it’s always best to check listings for your own area. The selection of programs reviewed reflects what I’m given access to by networks and streamers, whether reviews are embargoed, how many shows I have time to watch and my own personal taste. The Odds and Ends section includes shows that I have not watched.

Bachelor recap: Fantasy suite night at the museum

February 7, 2023 /
Bachelor Zach Shallcross and his dates before the wheels fell off the pool party.
PHOTO CREDIT: All photos but screen grabs Craig Sjodin/ABC

There were two questions to be answered after Monday’s episode of “The Bachelor”: Is Christina Mandrell a mean girl or a misunderstood girl? And did Zach Shallcross and Kaity Biggar jump each other’s bones during their night at the Natural History Museum?

Well, OK, maybe three questions: If the episode’s musical performer is a cousin of the host does that make them a nepo baby? A nepo cuz, at least?

The episode was bookended by some (manufactured) drama and also saw a couple of women crash and burn — luckily not on the skydiving date — but only one of them decided to burn someone else on her way out. More on that later.

First things first: the “Bachelor” producers apparently have so little faith in their ability to keep viewers interested this season that they opened the episode with both gratuitous shower footage of Zach and a FaceTime call with Sean Lowe, although it’s beyond me why you’d want to keep reminding everyone that your show is 1 for 26 (maybe soon 27) when it comes to your stars actually using the platform to find their spouses. (OK, maybe 24 and a half if you count Jason Mesnick and Arie Luyendyk Jr.)

Next it was time for host Jesse Palmer to stoke the hopes of the 17 women who were still around and immediately crush 16 of them by handing out the first one-on-one date card.

ER nurse Kaity was the recipient and got decked out in a slinky green dress so she could . . . walk around a museum looking at dinosaur skeletons and animal dioramas?

The other women, as much as they were all “so happy for you, Kaity,” couldn’t help but notice Zach’s hand resting on her knee when he came to the mansion to pick her up. Little did they know worse was yet to come.

Zach Shallcross and Kaity Biggar commune in the shadow of a dino.

Kaity herself described the museum date as the only romantic thing she had ever done in her life. And I know she’s only 27, but what?

When she told Zach that after seven years of a toxic, on-and-off relationship she just wanted to feel safe and to find “a good man to treat me right,” you kind of wanted to hug her.

This show makes a fetish out of vulnerability, but some of these women truly are vulnerable as hell.

The mood lifted when Zach — who kept whispering as if he was afraid of waking up the fossils — gave Kaity the date rose, then invited her to spend the night with him in a tent next to the elephant display. There were his and hers animal pyjamas and two camp cots, which they pushed together before zipping up the tent.

I guess what happened in the museum stays in the museum, for now anyway, but the other women were rattled when Kaity came home the next morning, still in her PJs, and talked about how romantic the date was.

“Did you get any sleep?” asked Gabi.

“Nope,” Kaity said.

That was the point, of course, to stress out the other contestants thinking Zach got intimate with Kaity. Why else would you put an overnight date in the third episode?

It was back to business as usual, however, with a football group date, the fifth instalment of the so-called “Bachelor Bowl.” It was the Shall-Crushers against the Ball-Zachs and, honestly, the latter should have won for the name alone.

Ariel, Christina, Kylee and Kat of the Ball-Zachs prepare to kick off Bachelor Bowl V.

Despite an ambulance being called when Anastasia took a dive, there were no injuries unless you count Gabi’s pride when she peed her pants a little on national TV.

The Ball-Zachs did indeed win and got to enjoy an after-party with Zach while the Shall-Crushers slinked back to the mansion. Only two things of note happened.

Bailey, one of the women who first met Zach on “After the Final Rose,” decided she needed “validation” from him, but as soon as she told him things were feeling “weird” to her and “regressing a little bit,” he rapidly agreed.

“I’m just not confident there is a future between us,” Zach told her.

“I do feel, like, if we had more time together, like, we could get there,” Bailey responded.

Like, you’re on “The Bachelor,” sweetie. Even the women he really, really likes don’t get enough time.

Bailey’s departure upset the other women and was the beginning of the end for Christina.

Bailey says goodbye to the other women while Christina makes a sad(?) face in the background.

She had already been annoying her teammates by bringing up her one-on-one date. Sin No. 2 was to describe Bailey’s departure as “sad” but “inevitable.” Strike 3 came after Charity got the group date rose. As the other women told Charity how well-deserved it was, Christina blurted out that she was confused as well as mad that it didn’t go to her, punctuated with a “duh,” all of which appeared to make Charity cry.

Christina defended her faux pas as her “trying to be 100,” but Brooklyn and Kat countered that Christina was making things all about her.

Finally Brooklyn shut down the argument with a line that will live in “Bachelor” infamy — or at least in the highlights reel at “Women Tell All” — “Have you ever considered just literally shutting the fuck up?”

So was Christina deliberately trying to intimidate, and being manipulative and calculating, as Brooklyn said?

I don’t think so. She clearly sucked at reading a room, particularly one of exhausted and emotional fellow contestants, and it seems she never heard the expression “If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all.”

Christina’s final reckoning was still to come. First there was a second one-on-one date to dispense with. If you were surprised it went to health-care strategist Aly, well, join the club.

She put on the wedding jumpsuit that the producers sent over and met Zach, dressed in a groom-like charcoal suit and white, open-necked shirt, next to a wedding bower — and I’m sorry, but these faux wedding dates are as boring as the football ones.

Zach to Aly Jacobs: “Will you jump out of this really scary plane with me?”

At least it wasn’t one of those stupid fake wedding shoots; Aly and Zach got dressed up to parachute out of a plane, because that worked so well for Rachel Kirkconnell on Matt’s season.

But you know, Zach is looking for his best friend — which is becoming the overused, meaningless phrase of the season — and, uh, best friends jump out of planes together?

Zach and Aly emerged unscathed to have dinner at the cool-looking Bradbury Building in downtown L.A. True confessions were on the menu.

Aly told Zach that she liked to be in control of everything to avoid the hurt of her past relationships and that she never put herself first in a relationship before, but she wanted to find “a safe space where I could put myself first but still be fully invested in you.”

Zach seemed down with that or at least down with getting to know the real Aly — it is only Week 3, people — and handed over the date rose.

Griffen Palmer gets to enjoy performing on “The Bachelor,” i.e. having the Bach and his date ignore you.

Then he had a surprise: Griffen Palmer was playing a song called “Second Chances.” Who dat? Why Jesse Palmer’s country singer cousin from Pickering. Look out folks, the Canadians are taking over.

Speaking of Jesse, he showed up at the mansion the next day to announce there would be no rose ceremony cocktail party . . . but there would be a pool party so run and put on those skimpy bikinis girls!

It was all fun and games and clandestine smooches until Brianna, a.k.a. America’s first impression rose winner, decided to tell Zach she was leaving.

No surprise here. It seemed obvious to me from Night 1 there was nothing cooking between Zach and Brianna, which I guess is what happens when you let “America” hand out the roses instead of the Bachelor. Yeah, great idea, Mike Fleiss.

But Brianna had a parting gift for Christina. She told Zach that their “connection didn’t get off the ground because of hard things I’ve been going through in the house” and that she felt intimidated by Christina, who made her cry several times.

Brianna Thorbourne has her exit interview with Zach.

So where is the footage of this intimidation? The only thing we saw, in Week 2, were receipts of Christina giving Brianna a back-handed compliment on the first night, which Brianna interpreted as hurtful.

Look, it’s always tricky when a white woman is accused of making a Black woman feel unsafe, but this reeked of production stoking Brianna’s insecurities and then manipulating her to throw Christina under the bus.

Whatever the case, Zach really wasn’t kidding when he told Brianna he didn’t like drama.

Christina defended herself as best she could, telling Zach her “outgoing and happy and loud” personality was rubbing people the wrong way, but she thought her conflicts with a couple of the other women had been settled and it would be a mistake to believe Brianna’s accusations.

And then she went and cried on the stairs.

Quite honestly, I figured Zach would go through the motions of debating whether to keep Christina and she’d get the final rose, and then we’d have a few more weeks of her pissing off Brooklyn and Kat and Kylee.

But nope, Christina was banished as Zach gave roses to Jess, Gabi, Ariel, Genevie — who showed up at the rose ceremony with a cast on her arm? what?!? — Greer, Kat, Kylee, Davia, Anastasia, Brooklyn and Mercedes.

So who’s gonna be the centre of the drama now? Don’t worry, looks like somebody is getting outed as a social media clout chaser next week.

Sorry, Zach, if you didn’t like drama you should have stayed home.

You can watch Monday at 8 p.m. on Citytv and you can comment here, visit my Facebook page or follow me on Twitter @realityeo

Edited because a reader — yay, I have readers! — emailed to point out that Jason Mesnick wasn’t the only one who married his runner-up.

Watchable on Disney, Acorn, Crave Feb. 6 to 12, 2023

February 6, 2023 /

Show of the Week: Kindred (Feb. 8, Disney+)

Micah Stock as Kevin and Mallori Johnson as Dana in “Kindred.” PHOTO CREDIT: Tina Rowden/FX

This miniseries opens with what I can only imagine would seem like twin terrors for Black Americans: a young Black woman is lying in the middle of a room in obvious pain, her back striped with the marks of a whipping, and then, once she’s bathed the wounds and dressed, white police officers come pounding on her door.

The woman is Dana (Mallori Johnson, “WeCrashed”) and, when the show jumps back two days, we learn that she has just moved to Los Angeles from Brooklyn with aspirations of becoming a TV writer.

But she hasn’t even unpacked all the boxes in the house she bought after selling her late grandmother’s brownstone when she finds herself being sent back in time some 200 years to a Maryland plantation. The trips continue, lasting seconds, minutes and hours in the present day (2016) but hours, days and weeks in the past.

And Kevin (Micah Stock, “The Right Stuff”), the white waiter whom Dana has just had sex with, accidentally gets sent back with her where they pose as slave and slave owner to fend off the suspicions of plantation owner Thomas Whelin (Ryan Kwanten) and his wife Margaret (Gayle Rankin).

Those are the broad strokes of this time travel drama based on the 1979 novel by Octavia E. Butler.

Without getting too spoilery, Dana comes to learn that her travel is tied to the Whelins’ son Rufus (David Alexander Kaplan): whenever Rufus is in danger Dana comes back to save him. Likewise, whenever Dana feels her own life is in danger she returns to her own time, but she has no control over when she comes and goes.

She also encounters a relative of hers (Sheria Irving), thought long dead in the present but who has similarly travelled back in time and become trapped.

But Dana’s attempt to confide about these alarming episodes to her aunt Denise (Eisa Davis) in the present day is interpreted as a sign of mental illness; her almost cartoonishly nosy white neighbours (Louis Cancelmi and Brooke Bloom) keep intrusively demanding to know what’s going on when they hear Dana screaming each time she returns to the present; and Kevin’s sister (Elizabeth Stanley) sends the police to Dana’s door when her brother disappears.

From what I have read, Butler’s book was meant to explore how a modern Black woman would experience slavery and there is certainly some sense of that in this adaptation — as well as a sense of Kevin’s disgust at the dehumanizing of the enslaved by the Whelins and other white people he encounters.

(Some reviewers have taken issue with the romance between Dana and Kevin, who is Dana’s husband in the book but a virtual stranger to her in the series. I, however, can imagine how people trapped in a foreign, hostile situation would gravitate to, and draw comfort from, each other.)

But I had a hard time buying Kwanten, an Australian actor known mainly for his role in “True Blood,” as a fearsome slave owner, at least up until the very end when he perpetrates violence on Dana and threatens the life of Kevin. Not that I’m suggesting “12 Years a Slave”-style brutality would have been preferable, but Dana seems to experience a fair amount of latitude on the plantation, at least until she doesn’t.

Johnson is sympathetic as an alternately confused, angry, terrified and guilt-ridden 20-something woman, the latter since the slaves she encounters can’t escape their reality the way that she can.

Despite the flaws in this adaptation — developed by playwright Branden Jacobs-Jenkins (“An Octoroon”) — you’ll likely be invested enough in what happens to Dana and Kevin to watch all eight episodes.

The bad news is that the cliff-hangers in the final episode might never get a resolution. FX declined to renew the show for a second season, although Jacobs-Jenkins is said to be shopping it around.

Short Takes

James Nesbitt and Victoria Smurfit in Season 2 of “Bloodlands.” PHOTO CREDIT: Steffan Hill/AcornTV

Bloodlands (Feb. 6, Acorn)

I don’t want to spoil anything for anybody, but if you watched Season 1 of this Northern Irish drama you already know that Detective Chief Inspector Tom Brannick (Northern Irish actor James Nesbitt of “Murphy’s Law” and “The Missing”) is not a good cop. Season 2 ties into Tom’s past sins when a crooked accountant is murdered and found to have connections to a trove of gold that was bound for the IRA but disappeared along with the two men in charge of it, whose skeletal remains turned up at the end of last season. Tom leads the official investigation into the murder while also pursuing a clandestine operation to find the gold with the help of the accountant’s widow, Olivia (Victoria Smurfit, “Ballykissangel,” “Once Upon a Time”). How long can Tom keep all those balls in the air without his clever underlings, Niamh McGovern (Charlene McKenna) and Billy “Birdy” Bird (Chris Walley, “The Young Offenders”), catching on? Also in the mix is the gold’s American gangster owner (Jonjo O’Neill, “The Fall,” “Bad Sisters”), who turns up in Dunfolan demanding its return. It can be taxing to connect all the dots in this series, but it moves along smartly and compellingly, with some emotional payoff in the latter episodes of the season. The final episode leaves some big questions unanswered, but it seems there’s still a chance for a third season, so we’ll see.

Acorn also has Season 2 of “The Madame Blanc Mysteries” (Feb. 6), the very light but pleasant series about crime-solving antiques dealer Jean White (Sally Lindsay) and her compatriots in the French village of Sainte Victoire.

Mohammad Saud and Salik Rehman treat a black kite in their makeshift animal hospital.
PHOTO CREDIT: Courtesy of HBO

All That Breathes (Feb. 7, 9 p.m., HBO/Crave)

Beauty can exist in very unlikely places. This documentary finds it in garbage-strewn streets in Delhi, India, where brothers Mohammad Saud and Nadeem Shehzad, and their co-worker Salik Rehman, rescue and treat injured black kites and other birds. The brothers, who were filmed over three years by doc maker Shaunak Sen, do this at great cost — financial, physical, emotional — and also at the expense of their long-suffering wives and children. Their devotion is writ large in one scene in particular, in which Saud and Salik swim through very cold water to rescue a single kite on a far shore; Nadeem has to wade in himself when they become so exhausted on the way back they feel unable to keep going. The brothers initially treat the birds in a dingy and sometimes flooded basement before an international grant enables them to open a hospital for their Wildlife Rescue organization. Adding to the tension of caring for the thousands of birds — injured by pollution and other human-made causes — is the political unrest and violence taking place in Delhi during filming. Saud, Nadeem and Salik persevere, seemingly unable to stop even if they wanted to. “Delhi is a gaping wound and we’re a tiny Band-Aid on it,” Nadeem says. He adds that “one shouldn’t differentiate between all that breathes” hence the title. Indeed, Sen’s camera frequently documents the creatures that share Delhi with its human population, from rats swarming a garbage-covered lot to monkeys, boars, dogs, goats, cows, horses, even invertebrates swarming a murky puddle. As Nadeem says, “Life itself is kinship.” This doc is up for a Best Documentary Oscar and won the Golden Eye prize at last year’s Cannes Film Festival.

Lea Thompson and Stacey Farber in “The Spencer Sisters.” PHOTO CREDIT: Bell Media

The Spencer Sisters (Feb. 10, 9 p.m., CTV/CTV.ca)

Despite all the sexy, serialized TV out there sucking up buzz and awards, the procedural isn’t going anywhere anytime soon, particularly the mystery procedural. So you can’t fault CTV for getting in on the action with this new series, particularly when the cast includes Lea Thompson, a legend for the “Back to the Future” films, and Stacey Farber, no slouch herself thanks to “Degrassi” and other credits. Here they play a mother and daughter who stumble into a partnership solving crimes. Victoria (Thompson) is a rich and famous mystery writer whose star is waning; Darby (Farber) is an ex-cop forced to move back in with Mom despite the huge chip on her shoulder over Victoria putting career ahead of family in earlier years. I have some quibbles — for example, how perfunctorily the blow-up of Darby’s police career is handled in the first episode — but if you’re looking for something light that won’t overtax your grey matter you could do worse than this. Thompson and Farber certainly seemed to have a hoot making the show together (you can read my Toronto Star interview with them here).

From left, Lolly Adefope, Mathew Baynton, Jim Howick, Ben Willbond, Laurence Rickard, Yani Xander, Simon Farnaby and Martha Howe-Douglas in “Ghosts.” PHOTO CREDIT: Courtesy of CBC Gem

Ghosts (Feb. 10, CBC Gem)

No, sorry folks, I don’t mean the American remake that has become a hit for CBS. I continue to prefer this British original version about Alison (Charlotte Ritchie) and the spirts she learns to co-exist with on the country estate she inherited from a distant relative. This fourth season, based on the two episodes I screened, perhaps doesn’t have as many laugh-out-loud moments as past seasons, but it continues to find sweetness and relatability in the relationship between Alison and the ghosts, and between the spectres themselves. There’s an endearing plot, for instance, in which ever cheerful Georgian lady Kitty (Lolly Adefope) teaches the by-the-books Captain (Ben Willbond) how to stop and smell the roses or, in his case, count the ants. Meanwhile, romantic poet Thomas (Mathew Baynton) develops a fan club among the plague victims in the basement and tries to kick his infatuation with Alison cold turkey; cave man Robin (Laurence Rickard) recognizes an acquaintance in a TV segment; witch-burning victim Mary (Katy Wix) finally reveals some details about her past; and Alison and husband Mike (Kiell Smith-Bynoe) soft-launch a B&B at Button House.

CBC Gem also has the CBC Kids preschool series “Mittens & Pants” (Feb. 6), about best friends Mittens the kitten and Pants the puppy, and their other animal friends.

Odds and Ends

Martin Mull and Gina Rodriguez in “Not Dead Yet.” PHOTO CREDIT: Eric McCandless/ABC

In keeping with the topic of TV characters who see dead people, ABC is launching sitcom “Not Dead Yet” (Feb. 8, 9:30 p.m., CTV2), in which Gina Rodriguez (“Jane the Virgin”) plays a down-on-her-luck journalist who gets hired at her old paper as an obituary writer and gets an assist from the dead people she writes about, who hang around until she gives them a proper send-off. Also starring Hannah Simone, Lauren Ash, Josh Banday and Rick Glassman, it tends to a schmaltzy “you go girl” tone, but it has its moments. CTV also has Season 2 of reality series “Auntie Jillian” (Feb. 11, 8 p.m.), starring YouTube personality Jillian Danford, husband Warren and grown-up kids Myles and Milan.

I would image the big release for many people on Netflix this week is Season 4 of “You” (Feb. 9), its drama about a serial killer (Penn Badgley). The streamer also has Season 6 of time travel romance “Outlander” (Feb. 6); the doc “Bill Russell: Legend” (Feb. 8) about the civil rights icon; and Season 3 of reality after-show “Love Is Blind: After the Altar” (Feb. 10).

W and StackTV are going all in on romcoms with “The Love Club” (Feb. 10, 8 p.m.), four original movies that will debut on subsequent Fridays about four friends who form a club to keep each other out of romantic crises. Each film follows a different woman on her quest to find love. How much you want to bet they all succeed?

Prime Video’s releases include another romantic film — it is almost Valentine’s Day after all — “Somebody I Used to Know” (Feb. 10), starring Dave Franco and Allison Brie; and the series “One Night Only” (Feb. 10), featuring Francophone comedians PA Méthot, Dominic Paquet, Rachid Badouri and Mariana Mazza.

Paramount+ has the docuseries “Boys in Blue” (Feb. 10), about a high school football team coached by members of the Minneapolis Police Department in the post-George Floyd era.

NOTE: The listings here are in Eastern Standard Time and I’ve verified the times where possible, but it’s always best to check listings for your own area. The selection of programs reviewed reflects what I’m given access to by networks and streamers, whether reviews are embargoed, how many shows I have time to watch and my own personal taste. The Odds and Ends section includes shows that I have not watched.

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